Not what made you think the church wasn't true, but how did you get what you needed to connect the dots?

Was it a book? Someone you are close to? The internet? Someone hurt you? Your own personality just let you outsmart them?

For me personally, it was both my personality and the internet.

Because, satire. Oh Satire, you sly yet kind thing. If it wasn't for my love of satire, I wouldn't have ever Googled 'why are mormons idiots'. That's really what I put into the searchbar, 1) To find a laugh, and 2) to understand anti-mormons better. But I ended up with a bunch of intellectuals and historians telling me a bunch of facts. (Well, actually there was this one Answers.com question that was all caps that was angrily bashing the religion, so I grinned at that.) At age 12, mind you, its only been two or three years now. So thanks, internet.

Through apologists. When I read their BS and realized they were not being excommunicated, I knew the church couldn't be true. If Moroni's promise were real, FAIR would not even exist.

By walking away from it.

I went semi-inactive in college, then totally inactive afterward. Once I was out of the indoctrination machine I realized I simply didn't believe any of it.

Funny how that works.

I quit attending due to circumstances out of my control, and after a while I didn't miss it much. I remember how downright bizarre the Facsimiles looked after about five years.

I started thinking it was strange how big doctrine changes only came because the U.S. government caused them to get rid of polygamy. And to allow blacks the priesthood. I started thinking how that doesn't seem like a church led by god.

The internet.

It started with the Deseret news "coverage" of the MMM rock cairn monument.

I was so TBM (although inactive at the time) I used to read desnews to get my news because it had a mormon tilt to it.

Coming from a rabid line of ultra-mad-cap TBM fanatics I knew every story from church history. You know the ones, the china chips in the plaster used on the Kirtland temple, the young JS refusing liquor during his leg mutilating surgery etc....the minutia of Mormonism. But MMM I had never heard of.

A few days later I searched the term "real mormon history" and was sleepless for a week.

For me it was the church itself. Growing up in SE Idaho, 4 years seminary, Eagle Scout, honorable mission, graduating Ricks, temple marriage etc. I was as tbm as anyone and staunch defender of the faith against anti Mormons and their lies. I had a lot of stuff on my shelf but I knew one day God would make it all right in my mind. He did...One Sunday just over 10 years ago, there was a story in our local paper about the Mormon church suing the Leonard Arrington family (after Leonard's death)to get certain sensitive documents and keep them from public eyes. That was a moment I will never forget, it had a physical nature to it, like a shock or slap in the face. My belief in the fraud of mormonism ceased in that exact moment.

The irony is that it was the church's actions and its attempt to keep something secret that apparently wasn't faith promoting from public view. In that moment everything came together in my mind and clicked, I no longer could believe in the fraud.

a big red flag was all the idiotic members parroting the words that the church is true.

Do any other churches do this ?

It does sound so fakey and canned. Any testimony meeting is just like that.

Little children who are barely old enough to speak are mouthing the same exact words as their elders.

Like lots of miniature robots. One by one, I know this to be true, the only word of God, JS the true prophet, as important as Moses or more, and sits at the right hand of Jesus at the throne of God.

Like, REALLY? Joseph Smith? Polygamist extraordinnaire? Gold digger? Charlatan?

Well maybe like the guy on the cross who was at side of Jesus when he was told "Tomorrow you'll wake up with me in paradise," kind of thing.

But not to become as God. He really had an overinflated ego of himself. Why so many fell for it is questionable. He really had a hold on his followers - without that control he wouldn't have been able to do diddly squat!

Like a Jim Jones or David Koresh ....

Gold fingah!

Those little 2-3 year olds have no clue what they're getting suckered into. Complete and utter brainwashing.

I decided I needed to take a time out. Once I stopped attending I was able to consider both sides of the argument instead of just the pro side. It didn't take long before I realized there were more cons than pros!

There is a much bigger issue here folks - when I found out the Jesus Christ story is as fallacious as the JS story religion went out the window for me.

It's not just Mormonism on trial - it's organized religion in general. It's all suspect especially if promises of an eterally blissful afterlife are being made in exchange for offerings.

If we all could make our planet and all living species our 'religion' imagine what we could be?

I never studied the scriptures (never read them all, actually) do never had a testimony. Just went through the paces until I stopped marching.

One day I realized the story of Noah was fake. It never happened and everything came crashing down.

Sorry for my bad English. I hope this does make any or at least a little sense for a native speaker.

I was bound to mormonism through religious emotions, spiritual experiences. My 'head' said: NO - right from the beginning of this fatal love affair. But as I had convinced myself that Christianity was 'true', then why should this JS story shouldn't be true also? It sounded equal crazy to me, so why not? It felt right/good to me. I was a kid and a teenager when I started to become 'religious'.

My luck was, that 'God' continued to talk to me and to give me spiritual experiences at places that definitely had nothing to do with the Mormon church, this allowed me (after a too long while) to walk away from Mormonism and it's strange believes.

Years later the internet showed me, what a big fraud this Mormon 'church' really was. This discovery made me very angry and opened my eyes for a closer look at Christianity with a similar disappointing result. I am still angry. Partly about my own stupidity and partly at those who knowingly 'lied' to me.

That was a wonderful comment, with just a few minor errors in grammar. You obviously understand your own experiences and express your feelings well.

Thank you for your kind comment.

Well done! Thank you for sharing your experience. =)

I peeked in it's journal.

The Book of Mormon showed me that the church was not true. The Book of Mormon promise that if you pray about the book then you will know it is true is not reliable. It did not work for me, and I noticed that it did not work for most of the people that missionaries give Books of Mormon to. So years later after a lot of foot-dragging and soul-searching, I left.

I sure wish I would have had all this internet stuff back then.

I never had a testimony and always had issues with the church. I found it non spiritual,noisy and uninspiring for starts. I never really got into Joseph Smith and didnt like the lack of emphasis on Jesus, including at Christmas and Easter. I never agreed with the church on social or political issues and that bothered me even as a child. There were too many petty ,Pharisee type rules.It happened gradually,but I was never cut out to be a Mormon.

For me it was the total sum of all the evidence. A house of cards. AND...having the realization that none of it had anything to truly do with Jesus, or God...who doesnt care about your underwear.

I prayed long and hard about it. The answer that it wasn't true was the exact opposite of the answer I was expecting.

I was sitting in primary one day (as a teacher) about 8 years ago and the things being taught the children just hit me like "I've heard this over and over again since I was a child" and it planted a seed of doubt. Then I googled 'temple garments' and found out that it wasn't JS's original idea and that got most of his ideas from the mason's and I don't think I believed after that. It was hard for me to learn and blew me away but I haven't looked back since and am happy that I had the fortitude to go thorough with what I thought wasn't true.

Never considered it a 'church". Always looked at it as a big rich social club. Seen so much favoritism, lies, power plays, I was always a misfit and "unworthy" to them.

The Mission Field totally de-converted me. It was actually a good thing that my family/ward over-idealized my expectations.

My mission turned out to be a high-pressure, abusive, arrogant, egotistic, wrongly-motivated experience. It was a male locker room fist-slapping, who-is-the-Big-Man here, piece of crap!


"Are we going to beat Zone Two, or not!"

"Elder, I need to report your numbers higher next week!"

"It's the unworthy Elder who loses his girl."

"You'll never rise above what you were in the mission field."

"You can't ask God to help you later in life, if you don't help Him now!"

"The harder you work, the hotter the wife."

"Suppose your family were watching you every day? Someday in Heaven they may do just THAT!"

"Polygamy was necessary because of all the husbands that were killed during the mobs."



I came home hating the church -- and hating myself.

I was brainwashed to think that anyone who was born into it had no way to leave. I had never met anyone who left except seeing bums and hobos on old 25th Street in Ogden when I was a kid. Once I went to college and grew up a bit I figured out that I could leave.

Yippee! I knew I would have to be ready to lose everyone I knew if necessary. I figured it would be worth it and it was.

You know you're right about being born into it, and not even presuming for a second it was a fake religion all along. That thought didn't enter my vocabulary either until much later.

I've lived in Ogden. It was pretty wild when I was there, in mid-70's. Don't know if it's changed much, but people were either really good Mormons, or the other extreme. Over conformists versus under conformists. A big polarity between "good" vs. "bad news" bears.

That's where living in the Bible Belt south helps.

There is no shortage of people willing to show you how the Book of Mormon is bunk. And there is no shortage of examples of how other people can live a good and successful life, without being LD$.

I was ALWAYS bothered by the Mark Hoffman affair, even as a teenager. If these men were "prophets", how could they have been so easily deceived?

I had indications the church had problems throughout my Mormon experience. I was always complaining why the leadership did this or didn't do that ---- especially when it came to some political issues passed in Utah by LDS inc.

However, I never asked God if it was true. I finally did but asked not for a feeling but documentation or other support.

The very next day I found myself on Mormon Stories (JD Website) and felt impressed to study the history. I also found myself at Heart of the Matter website where Shawn covered church history very well also.

Didn't take very long for me to find myself laughing/crying at myself for being so stupid to fall for a Con!

I didn't have an a-ha! moment, but after reading the revelation in the Feb. 2003 Ensign, that God's love is in fact conditional, I gave up trying to believe. "We will always support you as long as you do what is right" was the line from my family, but I had assumed that if Jesus suffered and died for my unworthyness, then he would see that I was a good person who was trying. In my "dark night of the soul" I found out that God didn't care.

Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 03/22/2015 08:11PM by steve benson.

My 'BullShit' meter was pegged on 100 at age 13, as a deacon.

Years later, I visited a Christian bookstore and found 'The God Makers' book.

The rest, as they say,is history.

A few years ago I found this board and all of you iced the rotten Mormon Cake for me.

Thanks a zillion!

~Breedum

I prayed one day for God to help me improve my financial situation.

One day later, my boss offered me an extra shift every week: on Sunday.

I took it, and my financial situation improved...not only for the extra hours, but because my lack of attendance at church caused me to stop paying tithing, too. Eight extra hours/week + 10% raise = MUCH better financial situation.

When my HT started lovebombing me, figuring out why I wasn't going to church, I just said "Yeah, I work Sundays now".

He said "I'm sorry!"

I said, "I'm not. I prayed to God to help me improve my financial situation, and He gave me work on Sunday. The Lord works in mysterious ways. Sometimes, you've gotta lose the Thomas Monson Good Housekeeping Seal of Approval, if you want to take the gifts God gives you."

I stopped and listened to what came out of my own mouth. That was my first cue that the Mormon Church was full of sh!t.

A lot of the heavy lifting came from JD's interviews of several scholars on Mormon stories blog. The why do people leave the church discussion on youtube had me question a few things I never even heard about. I pretty much bought many of the white washed history stories mainly because I didn't bother to dig any deeper in church history.

The Grant Palmer interview encouraged me to read an Insider's View, Mormon origins book. From there I read other books and old church sources correlated to what the "antis" were saying. Only this time I took time to look up references and the quoted material. The unvarnished narratives and factual truth didn't live up to the church narratives. I had strong evidence that suggested I've be defrauded for a long time. I had to work out the emotions and psychology books and RFM helped a lot with that.

I was out of the church cold turkey.


Even earlier in life as a TBM I had ventured my way here to rfm for the purpose of looking up the 2nd token of the Melchizedek priesthood key because I could never commit the whole thing to memory exactly as it is regurgitated in the temple. I knew the "anti" would have it listed. I didn't linger long enough otherwise I would of left the church many years before finishing college.

After I learned of TSCC's involvement in Proposition 8, I Googled something like "criticisms of the Mormon Church," and this site was in the first page (might have even been the first one). I read post after post and link after link,and the members of RfM were all too happy to answer my zillion questions :) I was seriously on here for hours a day (I doubt I am the only one who did that. lol). I had no idea there was a community of exmos anywhere. I believed the BS that no one ever left the Morg. I realized that the things I was reading were not "anti-Mormon," and was surprised many things came from the "approved works."

That was 5 years ago.

So, thanks, guys!

Gradually went inactive. Wasn't getting anything out of Sacrament meeting. Didn't feel the spirit. I'd never been to the temple and I read a book with the transcript of the temple ceremony. (This was before YouTube) and at the end of the book I thought, "That's what you're supposed to be so worthy for"? I came away from reading the book feeling the temple ceremony had nothing to do with Jesus. The temple is a main part of Mormonism and I don't want anything to do with the temple.

For me, it was the ever-widening difference between the way that Jesus taught us to live our lives, and the way that TSCC was behaving.


Firing janitors who needed the job was a huge wake up call.

The 5 billion dollar mall sealed the deal.

TSCC does NOT behave in a way that a church that represents Jesus Christ should behave!

...your post indicates you are still a teen, is that correct?

You have Lori at 17 beat by a couple of years. She high-fives you!

I read the BOM Translation essay before I knew anything about essays on the church.
Seeing on the lds website JS rock in hat without the plates made me sick to my stomach.
Ever since then I have been disconnected emotionally.