Bit the bullet today and went to Church. Wanted to sing some Christmas carols so thought why not, it's only an hour and won't be so bad!

I joked with people I knew and still friends with at Church - I'm here on an Undertaker style appreance. I show up a few times, then disappear again after the big day. Wrestling fans will get that reference.

Some observations;

Meeting started late as people generally running late. Even 10:30 is too early.
Chapel was only 1/3 full. In my active days it was always full. A friend I sat with remarked that a lot have left or are travelling, or moved wards.
Lot of people sitting looking at phone most of the time.
F&T meeting - lots of usual irrelevant remarks and drivel about how the church is a blessing and couldn't live without it.
One guy said the world will change with the Church, not the other way around. And that the many changes coming are a good thing and Rusty is inspired.
One lady spoke about not understanding ministering and wanted to serve more.
Hilarious moment - guy said that Santa was as real as Jesus Christ. Bishopric flinched at that.
Didn't take Sacrament as no longer a member, raised a few eyebrows around me!

Was it worth sitting through over an hour of Church to sing a couple of hymns? Sure...I caught up on emails in between singing haha. Will see what next week brings.

Tomrrow I'm attending a Christmas present wrapping activity in my old ward, the one I walked out of two years ago following numerous fights with certain members (and discovering the church was not true anyway!). Be interesting to see what happens there.

There are lots of places to sing carols and have parties.

“many changes coming are a good thing and Rusty is inspired”

Maybe the Danites will get back to work after the holidays.

OP, you are braver than I.

Nothing is worth the angst and hopelessness and disease germs that I would inhale, each time I went to Mormon cult meetings. I would literally have to crawl into a bed for 20 minutes, afterwards, to re-set my attitude to positive, again. I was fine during the work week and evenings with my children, and it wasn't until late Saturday that the depression would start to kick in. For my children and me, church was our most dreaded event. We needed to rest, from working so hard, not be beaten over the head for not working even harder for the cult, not giving the cult more money and attention. It sucked the life out of us. By the time we resigned, the Sunday depression was beginning to carry over into Monday and into my career.

Why take the risk of going back and having a relapse, just for the sake of curiosity or a few minutes of singing?

Every time I go into a Mormon ward house, I'm hit with flashbacks. All those buildings feel the same, smell the same. Mormonism reeks of despair. I was not strong enough to build up an immunity to it.

...there is no need to fear the Church now...for most of us. You could consider it similar to an Elks or Eagles Lodge, or even the VFW. I keep saying once out, now the fun begins! Roll up to your local Ward, go in, make yourself at home, pretend to care, eat the kids Cheerios, go into the Ward kitchen, make a BLT, and sit and eat, then watch some streaming films from the Ward Wi-Fi!