"Dear Members:

Thank you for your steadfast work here in the Tijuana Mission District. We have successfully worked with Revolucion Ave. vendors to slow the illicit fireworks trade, the dirty postcard business, and to prevent abuse and hardship for the donkeys working on the streets as photographic icons. We hope you come and visit us here, especially in the off-season of cartel violence. We have good food, great attractions, and a wonderful atmosphere of compassion; especially in the red-light district."

http://www4.pictures.zimbio.com/gi/26th+Annual+Imagen+Awards+Gala+Arrivals+awGTtRClExol.jpg

http://tanamatales.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/12/IMG_4871.jpg

I didn't know there was an "off-season" for cartel violence.
Yikes!

He must have a connection to know when the off season is.

He sounds like a stooge.

...OK then. El Guapo wishes you a happy Cinco de Mayo.............

http://img.blu-raydefinition.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/BDDefinitionThreeAmigos13.jpg?1902c1

I guess the cartel "blocked" the uploading of the Three Amigos.

...no, that was the First Presidency blocking it.

http://d12vb6dvkz909q.cloudfront.net/uploads/galleries/2157/3-amigos-1.jpg

LOL. The plot thickens.

...No...the guacamole thickens.

This isnt even an "official" US holiday like July 4th...

I'm Mexican-American and EVEN I don't know what the damn holiday stands for, except for more beer commercials and dollar tacos at Chipotle.

I celebrate the 4th, not the 5th.

The best analogy for Cinco de Mayo was given to me by a coworker that is from Mexico.

It would be the same as if Mexico started celebrating July 24th in Mexico for all the Americans that were living there.

Most would have no clue what the significance of July 24th is.

I was told that Cinco de Mayo is a state holiday not a national holiday.

Their 'independence day' is September 15th.

Cinco de Mayo is to Mexicans what Kwanza is to American Blacks: a thoroughly contrived holiday designed by people who don't know anything to celebrate their ethnicity.

Blacks don't celebrate Kwanza.
Mexicans don't celebrate "Cinco de Quattro," as one currently prominent politician mis-spoke it.

Cinco de Mayo commemorates the Battle of Puebla - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Battle_of_Puebla. My understanding is that it was a regional holiday in Puebla.

I guess they missed mentioning the part about the cheap bar girls in Tijuana. My friends used to go down there and get laid, even a couple of LDS ones who later served missions. Being somewhat of an ascetic myself (actually forced upon me by strict LDS upbringing, not something I would have done willingly), I never went there, myself. It is a den of iniquity, as I understand, full of people who smoke and speak Spanish. "Stand ye, therefore, in holy places!"