I have just recently joined and i gotta say that it is just great to read about other people going through the exact same things as me. I especially love reading about others mission experiences, and how awful they were and how they recovered from them. I live in Idaho surrounded by very active members, including my wife and family. I keep all of my opinions about TSCC to myself and i am scared to death about making them known to anyone. Thanks to everyone for sharing.

Welcome Jakedt11!!!

That sucks you are surrounded by a lot of TBMs. My wife and family are all TBM's for the most part, but I still let it fly that I no longer believe. I guess I like punishment.

Just remember, take things at your own pace. No need to rush into anything you don't want too. And enjoy learning about the church in a way that they will never tell you.

This is a great site. So many awesome people!

Welcome, jakedt11...

We are glad you found us...and glad you are here!!!

:)



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/07/2015 05:04PM by tevai.

Welcome to the group! Yes, it is refreshing and a relief to know you are not alone.

Fear is Mormonism's greatest weapon. I bet you'd be surprised to know how many people around you are only maintaining membership and obedience out of fear of losing their family, friends, job, good name, and support system. And it's depressing when you don't have anyone in whom you can confide.

I was scared to tell my mother what I knew about the church but it all worked out well in the end. Good luck to you for a happy future and hopefully without fear.

Thanks guys!! I think that its funny how all the TBMs in my life talk about how awful ex mormons are, or that they left because of some great "sin" they were committing. I really wish i was as brave as some of you were with leaving the TSCC early on. Our own intuition goes a long ways. When something doenst feel right, it usually isnt. I feel that that is one of the crazier things of TSCC, you really have to push yourself to believe or feel that you are doing right. And thats just not right.

Welcome. Idaho gal here too. I understand how you feel. I was scared to death to tell anyone. Isn't it telling though how controlling the church is when you are even scared to voice an opposing opinion. Can you imaging anything else in your life that is that way?

I hope you find this place helpful. I was addicted to it when I first found it. Everyone was so willing to just tell it how it is. I found it shocking at first but also so refreshing. It was okay to think about, read about, study about, and talk about ANYTHING I wanted and not feel guilty about it. WOW!

Congratulations on the first step in the rest of your life. It is terrific on the outside - even dealing with TBM relatives is better than being a TBM yourself.

Even though you may feel "alone" and surrounded by TBMs everywhere, I can almost guarantee you have at least one or two others in your ward that feel the same.

You can try to ferret them out by bringing up some of the subjects that have been in the papers lately, i.e. the Sunday School teacher who got released for teaching the "Church approved essay 'Blacks and The Priesthood'" or any of the other various essays.

You might also discuss the latest Dragon Moms or one of the interviews from "Mormonstories.org" or listen to one of the podcasts from infantsonthrones.com or watch one of the videos on youtube even if your wife isn't receptive, you could find a like minded person in priesthood or Sunday School just by bringing up one of the topics. At least you would have an ally and some one IRL to talk things over with.

Welcome!

If you have a question about anything, there are all types of experts who frequent this forum... Professors, scientists, IT, lawyers, musicians, artists, finance... If you have any question about doctrine, you will get immediate quotes, sources...

You're not alone. Many of us are BIC babies, fourth and fifth generation from pioneer Mormons... I suppose you could say we are pioneers of another sort, leaving Mormonism...

Maybe something will start questions rolling in your family and you will be able to lead some people out of zombiedom. =)

"If you have a question about anything, there are all types of experts who frequent this forum... Professors, scientists, IT, lawyers, musicians, artists, finance..."

...and some ignorant, uneducated farmboys. :-)

You are one of the bright crayons in the box. I have seen you make apologists cry for their Momma.

And Jake, you may find this of use :)

I must not fear.
Fear is the mind-killer.
Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.
I will face my fear.
I will permit it to pass over me and through me.
And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path.
Where the fear has gone there will be nothing.
Only I will remain.

Dune - great book - that snippet also sampled on a record by Eon - "Fear is the Mindkiller".

As I said, Randy, experts. Take a bow for the standing ovation...=)

Susan is also an expert in so many areas, including troll hunting, and verbal smack downs! Do the wave for Susan!

VVVVVVVVvvvvvvvVVVVVVVVVvvvvvvvvvvvvvVVVVVVVVVVVVVvvvvvvvv

Hey, where in Idaho do you live? I'm in Meridian, always good to hear about people close by learning the truth and acting on it.

I left a while back, my wife more recently has gotten completely out as well. Life has been tough with extended family, but it does improve...



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/07/2015 06:10PM by brucermalarky.

welcome to adulthood.

there are also plenty of former (and current) bishops, stake presidents, elders quorum presidents, relief society presidents, ward clerks, gospel doctrine teachers, etc roamimg this site also.

Rexburg here jakedt11, several blocks east of byu-I. I know what you mean by being surrounded. Hang in there, I've had people come to me and reveal that they feel the same way. People I would have thought were as tbm as anyone, the power of the church is to isolate and make you think you are the "only one". Don't fall for it.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/08/2015 12:10AM by orthus.

I think I've been hanging around here for about a dozen years, first because I felt isolated and scared, like you, and then because of all the great stuff there was to learn (and this continues - we frequently know about things long before the members do) and lastly, just because I like the people here.

This is a supportive and knowledgeable group.

Your post made my day. It's a perfect example of why RfM is here because it lets people know they're not alone.

I'm Idahoan 6th generation [now ex-] Mormon through my dad's side. Never thought I'd leave either, until after moving to New York and growing up some more, I was finally led to do the soul searching and work to find out for myself the veracity of Mormonism's claims.

It can be difficult when the rest of your family is still in the church. I've been pleasantly surprised to meet cousins at a family reunion, one a retired civil engineer, laughingly tell me that there's many other of our cousins who've left too, like he has and myself. He called being LDS a wonderful, rich heritage, but that and along with its rich folklore (BoM Americana,) that's how he left it in his memory. His mother and my aunt was a salt of the earth Mormon woman. She was as sincere and devout a LDS you'd ever want to know, and good hearted through and through. Her generation didn't have the same information and materials made instantly available to ourselves or perhaps she'd have left too, as a younger woman?

For critical thinkers, and doubting Thomases it isn't much of a mind bender once you learn of the fraud by Joe Smith. Leaving becomes very easy at that point. It was reinforced for me after learning of the true history by going back to church for a short interval, where it then became solidified that the church is not what it purports to be. People in my upstate NY ward were even fearful of speaking out or asking any questions concerning the truisms of the gospel doctrine because of being shamed and ostracised by their peers and families. When I saw that level of fear was widespread, it was even more damning to me than had I not seen that firsthand.

Celebrate your right as an American to value "freedom of religion." Freedom to choose what works or doesn't for you. No one has the right to deprive you of what is innately yours to begin with. Congrats to you on your decision. It's a bold move, and the first step of many to freedom.

That's how I felt too - it was so great to have everyone here supporting me and validating what I was learning about the church. I was also surrounded by Mormons so this was so valuable. I love how everyone here is so educated and intelligent. Anything you want to know about Mormonism - you can find someone who knows or has a link or can recommend a book. It's great.

Welcome to our group...Great people to journey with..

This is awesome! Thanks for all of the tips. I can already tell just by the experiences that I've read that this is going to be a bumpy ride, but I am grateful to finally see beyond the facade of it all. I live in Idaho Falls and am finishing my bachelors up in Rexburg. And thankfully I only have a semester left to put up with all of the bull crap that goes on there, then I can finally move on to a real university.