Amyjo, I never intended a grammar lesson...

You made a minor error in a post and I attempted to mine it for the humor in it.

http://exmormon.org/phorum/read.php?2,1631202

We've all made these spelling or context errors. Recently Tevai teased me because I used "tired" when I meant to use "tried", and my error created a humorous sentence, much as the one you made, with your 'jerk people off' sentence. "Correcting" you gave me the opportunity to stick it to Boyd K. Packer, who published his belief that mutual masturbation was a cause of homosexuality. It was a joke meant to be at the expense of Bro. Packer, not you.

It's not in my nature to mock people for sport. Including my reference to Jesus' sandals was inappropriate because it was not directed at you, but to the concept of a personal flesh and bone ghawd.

As for my use of 'ghawd', it's my personal construct, so that people, not just you, will realize that I do not take the concept of ghawd seriously. It's pronounced the same, but does not carry the same meaning.

Now, the point that really 'hurt'... You challenged my 'grammar' and colloquialisms, and implied that I lack respect for the English language!! But as I mentioned, I take this with a grain of salt because you believed I was 'attacking' you and all your beliefs, when all I was attempting to do was be funny, be silly... (I live for laughter.)

Frankly, there are few people who have a greater respect for language and the written word than me. I've read S.I. Hiyakawa, who did so much to make the work of Alfred Korzybski 'palatable' to the masses. Not a lot of people attempt to understand just what is going on when humans open their mouths and speak, or put their fingers on a keyboard and press keys... Everybody thinks they are competent when they attempt to communicate, but 90% are barely hobbyists when it comes to this skill.

Using words is the principle means we humans communicate. Non-verbal communications exists, but it's very primal.

Colloquialisms are important because they are informal constructs that exist outside 'formal' communication. You'll seldom find colloquialisms in textbooks, or in any attempts to communicate with precision. New colloquialisms are constantly springing into existence and older ones often become accepted as part of the formal language.

If we are going to use them, we need to use them correctly, just as we do with any of the language arts. I take language arts very seriously and believe myself to be expert in their use. If this strikes you as pretentious, frankly, I am pleased!

:D :D :D

Humor is often left circling above some heads desperately looking for an entrance. Circling, hour after hour. Looking.

Desperately. Suddenly feeling very vulnerable and useless.


What I think is important to remember here is that Adam was inspired of God to name the creatures of the earth and so the duckbilled platypus would have still been the "duckbilled" platypus even if he had been named first. I know this because I had a very strong feeling about it.

Jesus--I have this on good authority--is spending the eternities with John the Beloved. You don't have to read between the lines to get that. You are no one unless you are invited to one of their dinner parties.

I love language. I loved your post elderolddog. But, I do love all dogs.

u wot m8 ?

All I have to say as I throw roses at you for your excellent

post elderolddog is Bravo, Bravo, Bravo.

That calls for some of that Spanish Sangria.

Ah, my dear Saucie, you have made a minor faux pas! Imagine how awkward the following sentence reads: "I love the 4th of July, when I eat lots of American hot dogs and drink French champagne..."

You see, just as hot dogs do not require the modifier that they are American, and champagne is by strict definition always French, so, too, is there no need to say "Spanish sangria."

I trust that you will take this with the humor that is intended, but if you are still miffed, I'll be happy to discuss it with you over some Japanese sushi.

Yeah, I saw what I did and I knew you would say something....

Instead of Japanese sushi lets have Italian sushi.... eh?

Actually, Elderolddog, my use of the same term is also an appropriate use of the word phrase "jerking off" according to the dictionary definitions of the same.

There are two dictionary definitions of jerking off. Yours and mine. 1 and 2.

You automatically assumed yours was it at the expense of the other.

They are both appropriate, and mine was used accordingly as I decreed.

As a verb, the dictionary definition is thus follows: "1) The definition of a jerk-off is slang for something done which is obnoxious or annoying. (My use in reply to TheMaster.)

2) Jerk-off is defined as an offensive term that is something relating to masturbation."(Your definition, and seemingly only one.)


* YourDictionary definition and usage example. Copyright © 2015 by LoveToKnow Corp

Webster's Dictionary defines use of the same phrase as adjective same: "1) of or having to do with masturbation; and 2) obnoxious, stupid, contemptible, etc."

And the English Wiktionary defines it in noun and verb pretty much the same ie, an annoying and obnoxious person, or one who uses deception. And then alternative meaning, back to your definition of masturbation.

So I was right all along. And you were only half-right. My use of saying the OP author was baiting and jerking people off was very apropos as he was being obnoxious by baiting whoever answered that Jesus lives in either our hearts or in heaven.

Pointing out what you perceive as faux paus is fine; but at least admit when you're wrong. And your deliberate and intentional misspelling of God to ghawd as something you perceive as to be lightly taken because that's how you perceive divinity as non-existent is still disrespectful to the written language.

I don't believe my comment you called out had anywhere near as much to do with colloquialisms or with Jesus and homosexuality as you facetiously suggested. You turned the entire meaning of what I was conveying upside down to make a point that turns out was misinformed.

My advice is if you're going to clean up language, start with your own first.

Good heavens! I wasn't 'calling out' your comment I cited, I was mining it for comic gold. Whatever you intended, I simply used the 'masturbation' connection inherent in "...jerking people off..." to make a silly joke.

I really can't see how your jerk-off dictionary reference has any validity, since the sentence in question reads:

"You ask a question just so you could jerk people off in your response?"

Your sentence would have been a perfect construction, based on a popular colloquialism, 'jerk people around' But putting 'people' between 'jerk' and 'off' does not allow for an implication that you meant to say 'jerk-off'! You didn't write jerk-off, you wrote 'jerk people off' You can claim to have intended it, and that's fine, but it's not there! I try never to create sentences that require 'mind reading'. See what I mean about 90% of the world not being skilled in communicating?

I plead guilty to being silly, way too silly to be of any concern for the serious likes of you. And believe me, I am feeling very wrong about now. I shall now take back my accusation that you made a 'minor error' and amend it to being a dumb error. I'll happily retract this canard if you can find a dictionary entry that states that 'jerk people off' means to be annoying to people.

"....is still disrespectful to the written language"

Hoo boy......we have a whole generation of people "disrespecting the written language"...LOL.....isn't that just totes adorb?

I hope the language doesn't get offended by those that don't show it proper respect.

And EOD is correct....to "jerk people off" would be to masterbate them. People that are jerk offs are a-holes.

No fair - Amyjo got upset with me first. She took offense becaused I questioned her answer in a way she felt attacked her beliefs. I guess if she wants to feel that way, fine. Just remember I am The First.

I still want to know where the different religions claim the body of Jesus resides.

While I grant your primacy, I must insist that the original thread having closed, that you start your own thread so that when she unloads on you, I shan't be splattered with any residue.

Thanking you in advance, I remain your humble serpent...

The land of make belief. Leave the dead body alone.

Aj, one word: Miralax.

"olddog", you're too clever by just about half.

Poetic really. old dogs don't run with the pack any more, they just lay on the porch and bark at passersby.

"Your humble serpent" foflmao!

In B4 elderolddog starts licking his angus

Entertaining thread. Seems we can't communicate using language.

Ouch!

No ouch intended... :)

Licking his angus??? Well I rectum you're right.

One of the all time greats:

Rectum? It damn near killed'em!

Is it a "colloquialism" that the very religious seldom have a sense of humor?
Or is it simply an observation, validated in this case by a particular poster's response to this and other threads?

My love of language wants to know...

Oh, and elderolddog -- we had Sangria last night. Though Spanish, it went well with the American adaptation of the Mexican tostadas I made for dinner. An international melting pot in my mouth. You would have loved it ;-)

If you put pickles and chopped up kosher hot dogs on your Americanized tostadas, there is a special place in heaven for you.

I love you Hie.

I love you too BlueOrchid

I love the love fest. :)
I even love Amyjo. No, seriously, I do!

....very funny thread!!! Enjoyed it!!
More humor - always a little more -- it's good for what ever is bugging you!