I would have chosen the "F-Word" if it was allowed in the thread title.

Add this "way" to the too-numerous-to-count-ways the church shows who comes first in its youth missionary program.....the constant shuffling around of the missionaries to new areas and new companions. I realize this practice can have its plus sides, but picture a young, quiet, shy, and very obedient granddaughter of mine and you will realize one of the down-sides.

Here she is, half way into her mission across the Atlantic, very homesick and upset with her latest "assignment". I know in some ways I cannot even begin to know how she feels, but I do know this.......for her to even complain and express some of how she is feeling, lets me know that this is only the a tiny, tiny bit of how yucky she is really feeling, because she just would not share that this mission was anything but perfect under most circumstances. Usually, in her letters she goes on and on about how lucky she is to be doing the Lord's work, but this was noticbly missing.

So, you former missionaries out there, I have thought and will list after this, the reasons I can think of for the church to routinely move missionaries. Would greatly appreciate any additional insights you care to share.

1. To show that the LDS Church is in CONTROL and knows what is best for the missionary, saying, of course, that the Lord is guiding those in charge.

2. To prevent (hardy ha, ha) missionary liasons with the same sex or opposite sex both among missionaries as well as the area being served.

3. To weed out the leaders from the slackers and reward their efforts.

would have been disastrous for someone like me. I knew for many reasons I could never consider a mission (I'm 58, so that was long ago).

One of the posters here who I talk to off the board wrote a book about her mission (which she hasn't published) and allowed me to read it. One of the companions she had at the beginning of her mission was ABUSIVE. I don't know how she survived or why she stayed??? I can't remember what she told me when I asked.

MAYBE one of the reasons is they actually realize some people will be really difficult to get along with so the kids don't end up with a wacko the whole time they are on their missions.

Missions to me sound like a total recipe for disaster. My disabled brother went on one 30 years ago and he has never been the same.

Before my son left on his mission I was very clear with him that he was under no obligation to go. In fact, that in my opinion, he shouldn't go but instead stay in school and concentrate on his studies. He went anyways.

Whenever he would send an email home bitching about the conditions of his mission, I would email him back saying, "Nobody forced you to go on your mission...nobody is forcing you to stay."

Good for you. It must have been nice for your son to know that he had an out if he needed one.

From reading many of the posts here about missionary experiences, I think another thing I'd want to tell my son or daughter if they chose to go on a mission (thank goodness that never happened), is that THEY are in charge of their life, EVEN IF they are serving a mission, and if there is something they feel they should do or not do, then that is their decision, ESPECIALLY when it comes to their HEALTH or SAFETY.

I guess then it might be useful to talk about how to handle situations responsibly.

But I think the scariest thing about missions is how they isolate missionaries and strip them of their ability to think and act for themselves.

one of my companions tried to get abusive with me until I threatened to kick his ass from Buenos Aires to Sao Paolo and back. Things got real calm after that

One of my companions got her jollies jabbing me from behind in the ribs HARD! to see how high I would jump. I told her that if she did it one more time I'd turn around and smack her in the jaw, HARD! That ended it fast.

I think a lot of sister missionaries from Europe have psych issues. At least that was my experience. But one from Japan and one from USA also had psych issues. Since I went for my masters degree in Psychology after my mission, I had experiences that gave me lots of raw data for research. It also included a pretty wacky MP and wife who came into the mission as I was leaving.

Moving missionaries often prevents them from getting too attached and comfortable with the local people and culture. Missionaries are so young that if they spend enough time in one place, the people and places may convert the missionaries. I've seen this happen with two missionaries. One actually moved back to his favorite missionary city and never returned. Mormonism doesn't work so well when people love people more than the ideology of Mormonism.

I don't think there are any dark or ulterior reasons for missionary transfers. If an organization is going to have a two person companion system there will need to be transfers. After a few months together most missionaries are looking forward to a new companion. And for those that don't get along well together a new companion can be godsend.

As for moving to new areas, for missionaries who are "on the plan" and following the rules, moving is necessary to keep things interesting as well. On my mission missionaries were on average in an area for 4-6 months. That was enough time for me. After that amount of time in the ward it was nice to go to a new place and meet new people. Also, my mission, and I'm sure all missions, had areas that were considered better assignments than other areas and so transfers helped even out the assignments so that all missionaries served in both good areas and less desirable areas. And then finally, there were missionaries who didn't have the best social skills and so they had to be moved a lot so they wouldn't irritate the members in any particular ward for too long.

As for preventing inappropriate relationships, transfers were useful in preventing that too. But that is similar to the corporate world and other organizations. For example, I read somewhere that Wall Street firms require their employees to take a solid two week vacation every year as an anti-corruption measure. The theory being that the person covering the employee's job while they were gone would notice if anything shady had been going on.

In sum, transfers are a definite positive side of a mission. If you have less desirable area or don't get along with your companion you're not stuck in that situation forever, but just have tough it out until the next transfer. Of course the entire mission is just a waste of time, but that's for different thread.

Thanks for your responses......interesting and informative. I feel I have more of an understanding of the atmosphere for mishies which will help me (hopefully) to relate better with my indoctrinated granddaughter. It really did pain me to read her homesick letter at this half-way mark. She was never this homesick even when she was out as a new missionary.

As par for the course, the church/cult is missing the mark in preparing and teaching the youth they are indoctrinating to go on missions. (pure child abuse, in my opinion, that they indoctrinate them to go at this age). The cult could be teaching those kids BEFORE HAND not only all about the culture where they will be serving, but about human relationships and skills aimed at getting along. So often these are not learned in Mormon homes where the emphasis that if you are learning about the church, everything else will magically fall in line and appear at your doorstop.

I'm reminded of the great essay, "All I Ever Really Needed to Know I Learned in Kindergarten" by Rober Fulghum. Hells bells, even if the church taught them this and followed the wisdom in this essay, what an improvement there would be for the lives of those young people! Here is the essay:

ALL I EVER REALLY NEEDED TO KNOW I LEARNED IN KINDERGARTEN
By Robert Fulghum

Most of what I really need to know about how to live, and what to do, and how to be, I learned in kindergarten. Wisdom was not at the top of the graduate school mountain, but there in the sandbox at nursery school.

These are the things I learned: Share everything. Play fair. Don't hit people. Put things back where you found them. Clean up your own mess. Don't take things that aren't yours. Say you're sorry when you hurt somebody. Wash your hands before you eat. Flush. Warm cookies and cold milk are good for you. Live a balanced life. Learn some and think some and draw and paint and sing and dance and play and work every day some.

Take a nap every afternoon. When you go out into the world, watch for traffic, hold hands and stick together. Be aware of wonder. Remember the little seed in the plastic cup. The roots go down and the plant goes up and nobody really knows how or why, but we are all like that.

Goldfish and hamsters and white mice and even the little seed in the plastic cup - they all die. So do we.

And then remember the book about Dick and Jane and the first word you learned, the biggest word of all LOOK. Everything you need to know is in there somewhere. The Golden Rule and love and basic sanitation, ecology and politics and sane living.

Think of what a better world it would be if we all - the whole world - had cookies and milk about 3 o'clock every afternoon and then lay down with blankets for a nap. Or if we had a basic policy in our nation and other nations to always put things back where we found them and cleaned up our own messes. And it is still true, no matter how old you are, when you go out into the world, it is best to hold hands and stick together.

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Instead, the church/cult does not, nor will it, follow this common sense wisdom in this essay dealing with the young missionaries. Instead, they tell them to hide their heads in the sand, to not even read or find out the daily news. A balanced life is not recommended in the least----rather those kids are abused into working long, long hours Critical thinking is not advocated in the least, just follow the leaders who, they say, will not lead you down the wrong path.

Missions are hell. It's like you are still in high school. There is always a group of the "it" kids, usually from Utah and Cali, boasting some mor-celebrity bloodlines. They get boxes of homemade snickerdoodles, which they don't share. They have extra money and keep themselves in good food, which they don't share. They come into the mission vested with power, and the missionary system recognizes them as such. They make life sad for everyone else.

The moving around is crazy. I was sent to the farthest point away from the mission home for my last two months. Back then, we payed our own way. My train ticket cost one month's worth of food money, and I needed to save the second month's for the trip back. Literally made tortillas out of water and flour, with a little sugar on them. Had that for eight weeks. Got even sicker than I had been already. The long train rides included overnights, moving through strange cities with who knows who sitting with you. I had my share of depression issues on my mission, but I really felt bad for the even more fragile I saw. If they were in a good situation, why couldn't the frickin MP just leave them alone? Oh, wait, I mean the Wholey frickin Ghost, who after all provides transfer instructions to the MP, right?

I had 4 companions that we're complete nightmares (for various reasons).

Believe me, at those times a quick transfer would have been greatly appreciated.

Mormon missions are outrageously abusive.

I was one of the "lucky" ones that went during the brief time that missions were 18 months.

It still seemed like an eternity.

Forcing a person to live with someone NOT of their choosing and with whom they do not get along is abusive and should be STOPPED.

Serving a mission, to this day, is the one thing that I cannot get over about Mormonism. It makes my blood boil just thinking about it. It feels like this thing that just lingers inside me! My mission president was the biggest ass kisser I'd ever met among the "grand" leaders of the church. He had served in Guatemala as a missionary, and was then called to serve as the mission president of the Guatemalan mission I was in. When he first arrived he told us that, although his Spanish was pretty rusty, he still had been able to maintain the native accent. HAHAHA Very very far from the truth, he sounded like some idiot trying to speak spanish with a Russian accent! One of my companions could do a damn good impression.