My oldest TBM brother asked this of one of my younger exmo brothers at the funeral of our wonderful newly dead youngest sister.

TBMs seem to think no one has a brain to interpret facts on their own. They always look for an "example" or an "influence."

Over his lifetime, this TBM brother has insulted and discounted every one of the four younger exmo siblings at every turn. I am the most outspoken when he does this to me, so he assumes I've tainted the thinking of everyone else.

He came to the funeral after never showing a sliver of interest in our dear sister while she was alive. He expected to show up and have free food and lodging at my dead sister's home and to have her grieving husband entertain him with free tourist excursions during his funeral trip.

Why? Because families are forever and he is family. Also, since he's never traveled to the area, he expected to utilize the stay as a tourist extravaganza at my BIL's expense.

He spoke at the funeral and mentioned our dead sister only once in passing. His whole talk was hinting how he needed money and expected the family to honor him as their patriarch and return to Mormonism for the pleasure of seeing him in the afterlife. What an oaf.

I hope to never see him or any other TBM relative again.

Did I poison my sibs against the morg? No, I'd say the TBMs in the family did that without my help.

If you're like me, Cheryl, you do what you can to "poison" others against the LDS church, but the church itself does a far better job than any one of us could ever do.

Your brother sounds like a true oaf.

bingo

Your role was as a vaccine not a poison! ;o))

I have seen bishops and stake presidents go on witch hunts when someone resigns from TSCC. It seems to be slowly sinking in that there are tens of thousands of people online posting about Mormonism and many sources of the truth. The exmo down the street or the guy in high priests group that doesn't believe everything he is told probably had absolutely nothing to do with someone's disaffection. That and the fact that the Book of Mormon is one of the most effective tools for creating exmos.

I'd concur with your last sentence. It seems your brother is fully capable of turning people off from mormonism and mormons all by himself.

It's funny in their "he/she left because he/she was offended" it never occurs to them, that it implies themselves being rude and disrespectful in the first place.

"I am sorry if you were (unworthy and stupid enough) to be offended!"

+1

Wow, what an oaf of a brother. I am glad you are here and posting these experiences, which help others realize they are not the only ones involved, directly or indirectly, with a crazy religion.

I hope so.

Trust need...They don't need ANY help.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 12/10/2015 09:14AM by momto15kids.

My first thought on reading the title of the OP was, "OH, if only Cheryl had that has her super power! Bringing reason to masses in herculean proportions."

So funny to hear the TBMs who are masters of brainwashing and indoctrination accuse someone else of the same.

Your brother is a pretty close description of my brother. I won't be seeing him once my parents are gone either.

All the best to you, Super Cheryl.

My TBM brother said the same thing when his oldest son refused to go on a mission, and stopped going to church.

He blamed me for his son's apostasy.

His son, by the way, hadn't seen me in several years (they live in a different state). But I guess the apostasy cooties aren't limited by space or time...?

I have a feeling that my brother will be the exact same way when he finds out that I no longer believe in the myth.

I don't have too many other close siblings. Mostly step siblings that I contact every once in a while and then other steps that I have never met.
I am sorry you have a brother that tries to think for others. I am also sorry that he accuses you for thinking for the rest of your siblings. It is awful to think that the indoctrination runs that deep in some people that they turn on their own family.
I will pray to the god of sex drugs and rock and roll for your older brother.

Narcissists see mirrors where others see windows. They're so busy looking at themselves, they've no idea how they look to the rest of us.

You have the right idea, Cheryl. They're best left alone.

I needed a pick me up and got it. Thank you, RfMers!

Your brother sounds like a total, puffed-up toad.

Best wishes to you and your aspoustate, Cheryl.

Tom in Paris

Wow. This sounds sort of similar to my experience when I attended my TBM father's funeral in SLC.

I ran into my former bishop growing up. We had gone on scouting campouts and spent a lot of time together back in the late 1970s and early 80s. It was great to see him again only he could not say two words to me. Apparently he found out that I was an apostate. The shunning was obvious and awkward.

I suppose that they don't want to be influenced by me and become in-league with satan. Plus this guy did say a vaguely condescending thing to my exmo younger brother. My younger brother is a Lt Col in the US Army and has done 4 tours in Iraq and Afghanistan. This stupid former bishop had zero right to attempt to belittle my brother. My brother let him know that he was out of the cult and was seriously thinking of kicking his ass.

I told my brother that this guy wasn't worth the litigation and my brother calmed down. We all agreed that cults suck and we wish our Dad hadn't been taken advantaged of by so many of the cult members in his life.

The good news is that most of my family is now out of the cult. With my father's passing there is little pressure left to keep everyone towing the line.

Hi Cheryl. I always enjoy your posts. Most of us who left the church can relate to the condescension that is hoisted on us by remaining TBMs. If anyone has a solution to remaining involved in family member's lives when they act like brutes, I would love to hear your ideas. Like you, I am ready to cut ties with my two sisters, because in their eyes, I am a traitor. It is so sad. I know how you feel.

Your stories are always recognizable to me, Cheryl. Isn't it just fucking peachy what we have to endure? Some people seem to think they just flew out of God's ass to inherit the universe. Why do we have to know them?

Yes, it was that damn Cheryl Hines Kennedy.:)



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 12/12/2015 09:13AM by heat27.