I don't do this often. It's been years since I really tried to explain it. But a well meaning friend of mine posted an article on FB about Mormons resigning and asked for an explanation. And so many people simply don't understand.

Years ago I explained it to my wife. She's a nevermo but went to BYU as part of their ballroom team in the late 90's. I met her in Provo before I left Utah. She didn't understand either. She thought the Mormons were goofy but relatively harmless. It was only after explaining losing friends and family members and going through the social ostracization that she began to understand. Talking about the discovery that the whole anchor for your life was fake. She gets it now. Why is this so hard for others to understand?

Unless they've been a Mormon, JW, Scientologist, Hutterite, Amish or old order Mennonite they have no frame of reference. They are all cults and their entire MO is to exercise absolute control over their followers.
One of my dearest friend was raised in a very strict Mennonite family and is shunned by his sisters and brother to this day, 45 years after he married out of his faith to a lapsed Mormon.
We have some very deep and memorable discussions.

RB

Why? Because you have to experience it, or something like it, to understand it. Because so few people have ever had to stare into the abyss they're dangling over.

Nevermos probably tend to think of Mormonism as an odd but harmless offshoot of Christianity. As Lethbridge Reprobate said above, in order to get them to understand you have to compare it to very controlling faiths such as the JWs.

summer Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Nevermos probably tend to think of Mormonism as an
> odd but harmless offshoot of Christianity.

Definitely this. Most never-Mos know little or nothing about Mormonism unless they live in an area with a lot of Mormons.

Ironically, I believe it is also the very weirdness of some aspects of Mormonism that actually protects its reputation and image among never-Mos. For example, when Romney was running for Pres I had some discussions about him with my dad, who supported him, and a few other never-Mo family and friends, and sometimes the topic of Mormonism would arise. If I mentioned, say, the whole underwear thing, or that non-Mormon friends and family are excluded from Mormon temple weddings, the reaction among fellow never-Mos was always along the lines of "Yeah, right! THAT can't be true!" My dad even asked me, "Why do you hate Mormons and have to make stuff up about them?" (It was all stuff I'd learned on RfM or even in a few cases from TBM friends.) It was obvious to me that many never-Mos, if they do hear of some Mormon beliefs or practices, simply find them too odd to be credible.

This exactly. Even after growing up in a morridor state and marrying a man whose maternal side is all mormon, I didn't get it until they went after my daughter. When I started to research, I was stunned, and to be honest, almost hurt. I had friends that were mormon that were good to me and had not ever pushed (until my girl showed some interest). My husband's family were truly not pushy (still aren't. They are rare.) I had always thought of them as good people following God to the best of their ability as they had been taught. After all of the stuff we have been through, I am finally able to see that some of them are exactly that.

Some aren't.

I'm a little wiser, now. I can see the brainwashing for what it is. It is pretty stunning.

I went through various phases I suppose, from
1. spending most of my life never thinking about them at all really. If mormons ever came up, they were the people who dressed the same and bugged you during dinnertime (vs. JW who dressed differently and bugged you during dinnertime)

2. just some religion with it's own rules (just like other religions with their own rules)

3. moving to utah county, experiencing the isolation and judgment as an outsider, then.. far more important than that, hearing the devastating hurt and pain that the morg continues to cause in the lives of strangers and people I like. This is unforgivable to me and kills me to see people hurt like this.

I'm a nevermo, and I didn't get it until I read exmormon. Tell your nevermo friend to read some of the index stories, or the Thinking of Joining item. A real eye-opener...

It's probably true that you can't fully understand unless you've been Mormon. But likewise no one can explain it like someone who was Mormon.

As regards "Nevermos probably tend to think of Mormonism as an odd but harmless offshoot of Christianity" that's exactly the picture Edelman was hired to paint. I'd say he was worth the money.

Nevermo, and when I try to discuss what I've learned, I'm usually deemed a hater, idiot bigot or some other negative. I tell them to look it up themselves.

Most nevermos think of it as a mainstream Christian religion. I think one of the hardest aspects to grasp is the Orwellian nature of it, especially, the surveillance. I don't think I've ever mentioned the dead dunking, which I'm sure they'd think I invented. Dead dunking, if taken seriously, would be considered blasphemy of Jesus. It would be no less hateful than a cross in a jar of urine.

Now that I've mentioned crosses...

The rejection of the cross as a symbol of grace is the fundamental difference; the sacrifice is considered a completed gift of grace in Christianity. It cannot be added to or subtracted from by humans. All the "crazy" that comes from "earning" Mormon salvation, comes because grace is rejected. The Mormon hooey that "we worship a living Christ so don't focus on his death," is mere propaganda to increase control, and places salvation into the realm of human leadership. It removes the point of "For God gave his only begotten son..." Mormon men come along and say, "That's wasn't enough, God. We'll tell our members when they've done enough, not You."

And there goes agency. They harp and harp about how everyone has it, but only as long as you're "doing enough, their way, when they say. Apostates are said to have agency, but they are hounded (love bomb or shun) until death, and even after that.

I don't think that Christianity is any more valid than Mormonism, but the latter adds a human control to member behavior which negates the former, no matter claims to the contrary. Mormonism is the very definition of "wolves in sheeps' clothing," and most Christians don't understand Mormonism. Christians comprise the largest faith group in the US - 71% of citizens in 2014. I think it important that Christians learn the truths about TB Mormonism.

I think people are may be overstating the acceptance of Mormonism in this country.

For the record, I don't personally give a shit about the persecution of mormonism, because frankly, it's just them reaping what they sow. However, I've known of 3 different churches in the Midwest (some of them those trendy 'megachurches' with over a thousand members) that do active anti-mormon, evangelical Ed Decker style proselytizing against Mormons, and claim that they worship the devil (a gross misunderstanding of Mormonisms ties to Masonry), practice Polygamy (a topic thoroughly understood by the members of this board), and I've even heard stupid shit that Mormons have horns, burn effigies, etc. etc.

Baptists, Born-Agains, and Evangelicals have concerted, religious-based programs and efforts to.. I don't know if persecute is the right word, but to inform (or misinform as the case may be) people about Mormonism and its evil ways. (This is opposed to the partisan, just-informing-so-you-can-make-your-own-decision kind of style this forum takes, which is completely different in tone and more accurate).

I've seen and heard this kind of stuff where I've lived, in the Midwest. I was kind of suprised how well Romney was able to galvanize the religious right in 2012 into accepting him; a lot of the people who are responsible for funding republican candidates are baptist, born again Jerry Falwell/Pat Robertson/700 club types who really don't like Mormons. I guess at the end of the day they're pretty disingenuous and it's all about the politics. Plus, as much as I dislike Romney, he was probably the superior candidate among the 2012 selection of republicans. (Gingrich? puke)



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 02/25/2016 12:50AM by midwestanon.

But the very idea of a Mormon in the White House - a Mormon puppet who is obliged to dance when the good old boys in SLC pull the strings (don't want to lose that TR now, Mitt) was horrifying to me.

Seriously - a TR-holding President. Scary.

Nevermos just don't understand that Mo-ism isn't *just* another Christian denomination. And with some of them, you just can't get through to explain.

I experienced just what you're talking about when I lived in the midwest.

I had a neighbor who confronted me in my front yard. She proceeded to tell me everything I believed. I was not prepared for her attack, and I was a bit put off by some of the things she was saying. Her tone was one of rage.

I calmly asked her where she was getting her information from. She said her minister had been teaching them all about mormons. I thought this was interesting since Me, hubby and our 3 kids were the ONLY mormons in a town of 10,000. The closest church was 30 miles away. That's also where the closest mormons were (except us).

I asked her if he knew any mormons, and she said no. I asked her where he'd gotten his information, she didn't know.

I told her that he had shades of things that were correct,but he was more wrong than he was right. I didn't think he did too bad considering he didn't have much information and didn't know any mormons. I then invited her, her minister, and the entire congregation to come to the mormon church and listen to our Christmas choir presentation. She seemed quite shocked at the idea, but said she'd ask him.

There were about 40 people who came to our Christmas choice presentation. I have to say that we did a beautiful job. There were only 20 people in the choir. We sang the series titled O Devine Redeemer. It was narration mixed with music and singing. It was 100% about Jesus. Nothing about mormonism. They loved it. People left there knowing they'd been wrong about a few things. I felt good about that. I truly believed in Christ at the time. I would say I was probably more Christian than Mormon. The presentation was successful in that it got at least one congregation off our backs. What they were doing wasn't right imo. They were way off the mark and had built up an unnecessary enmity between them and mormons in the area.

What was interesting was their complete lack of history in the area. It was very close to Kirtland. They knew zero about what had gone on there. They had no clue about the temple or the RLDS/COC. I'm sure they were quite shocked to learn that mormons had once lived there and they weren't always from Utah.



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 02/25/2016 02:46AM by madalice.

I would echo what the other nevermos have said: RfM is the best explanation of mormonism around. Get someone to hang around here for a week or so and they'll get it.

Unless of course they're mormons already...

Tom in Paris



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 02/25/2016 02:48AM by Soft Machine.

closing your eyes can give you an idea of what being blind is like, then again closing your eyes for a few minutes can not really give you any idea of what being blind is really like.

Count me among the nevermos without a clue before I married my TBM wife. Until three years ago, my knowledge of Mormons were limited to:
--Donnie & Marie
--Mitt Romney
--a Tom Berenger/Charlton Heston movie involving some rogue Danites conspiring to kill Brigham Young
--a western with Richard Widmark trying to save some Mormon settlers from Lamanites

Oh, and I think I politely slammed the door on some mishies; or maybe they were J-Dubs. DW gave me an earful once when I asked, what's the difference? "We're nothing like J-Dubs!"

And don't even suggest there are any parallels between Mormonism and Scientology.

Needless to say, the research I've done in an effort to better understand my wife, and to ward off conversion attempts, has been an eye-opening experience.

I have become my non-Mormon family's go-to guy for all things Mormon, and they have a hard time believing half of the stuff that I tell them about Mormonism; and even that is but a fraction of what I've learned because I don't want to them to think less of my wife. How messed up is that?

I hate it when I post something about Mormons on Facebook and some idiot who knows nothing about the church tries to chastise me for "stereotyping" or being "bigoted". The other day, I posted this interesting comic written by a returned missionary who wrote that he was gay. I wrote that I assumed he'd left the church and some guy came on and claimed I was stereotyping. My guess is that he knows next to nothing about homosexuals and the LDS church.