Thank you to all who have shared their experiences, it has really helped me and my family. This started in my mind as a brief description of our experience (not so much now) but it mirrors so many others.

Member since 8 over 30 years ago, married with 4 children. Always had some doubts that prevented that "excitement" others feel in their religion. Heard and read various accounts of stories that didn't coincide with what I was taught earlier in life over years mainly on mainstream news sources.Did some research that proved stories to be correct such as JS polygamy/polyamory etc.

Didn't go on mission when younger, married wife over 12 years ago and two years after getting married got married again in temple. Glad we have photos to remember 1st wedding! She has similar background to me. Fast forward, attendance was semi with other obligations preventing all the time.

Fast forward - 3 wks ago last Friday my wife sent message saying she was really sad. Called to find out why and she began to explain that I was right and there was a lot more.She referenced CES letters that were in a post on FB from a friend originally posted by Taylorwordpres also known as Taylor6. I had never heard of this and told her I would look into. Needless to say I was shocked, not because it was all new, but a good portion of it was new. Two plus weeks later and I verified each account of what was written on separate sources including church's own sites/documents for a lot of it.

Then I found out more, unless I missed these in the CES Letters they were equally damaging... 5th Lecture supporting multiple 1st visions as told in CES Letters and differing versions of Diety that was in the D&C until 1920's. JS's arrest for fraud upon collecting money to treasure hunt with same seer stone used to translate and Adam/God Doctrine approved by JS and taught by BY (seriously can't believe this one actually was taught) My wife and I knew we couldn't go back in good conscience. We had to choose between three scenarios. I'll never forget this Easter, prior in the week she ordered 365 Day Christian Devotionals for our kids. While getting the Easter baskets ready I opened one and started to read. I immediately became extremely emotional with all the feelings coming out at once as I continued to read I was inspired and thought this is what it is about. Gospel of Jesus is supposed to be good news and make you feel this way, totally the opposite of what our former church made us feel.

Not certain if and when we will join a church again, but we do believe in God/Jesus and Holy Ghost (not certain which version now), but who knows that will come over time.

Our 3 choices:

1. Continue to go reluctantly knowing we would be sick to our stomach listening to that for our kids and ourselves also thinking how would they feel in 10 years if they knew we knew the truth and didn't tell them.

2. Leave quietly knowing one foot still in the door and open to all persuasion attempts and lack of closure.

3. Officially resign to let the healing process continue.

We chose option 3, signed letter this morning for ourselves and our children (hopefully know issues with signing for minors) and I dropped it off certified/registered this afternoon. I know there will still be some emotional times for LDS church has strong socio influence in the way everything is structured, but we are so excited for the future!

I am so grateful for my wife and her courage to share what she knew was true.

So question is how best to share with mainly believing extended family and maintain good relationships?

What an absolutely BEAUTIFUL post. I mean this in TOTAL sincerity. I have been wanting to post my story on here & just haven't found a way to do so , yet.

But what you said is crystal clear , brings peace , & is truthful.
Thank you.

Wow, what a way to introduce yourself! A wonderful story, welcome!

I'm sure many will want to share ways of telling the 'news' that has worked/not norked for them. All my family are nevermo's or jackmo's, so I can't help much.

There is a link on the main page to 'coming out' letter.

Your story made my day thanks for sharing here!

Welcome, Pr! The one piece of advice I can give you as a nevermo is don't feel that you need to explain or justify your choice to leave. If you do, you might get caught up in never-ending arguments.

One possible approach is not to announce anything and to simply let family members draw their own conclusions over time. This option might be more viable if you live at some distance from your famlies.

Another would be to take control of the announcement. Shoot out a mass email and say something like, "We love all of you and honor and respect the fact that you are faithful members of the Mormon church. We have no desire to disturb that. However we as a family have become uncomfortable with certain aspects of church history and have made the personal decision to remove our names from church records. This does not mean that we are rejecting YOU, just that the Mormon church is no longer the best fit for our particular family. We wish all of you the best and hope that you can respect our right to make a choice in the same manner that you want your own religious choices to be accommodated."

If anyone wants details, you could send them links to the church essays and tell them that is a starting point. But I wouldn't do anything more than that unless you see some serious shelf-cracking.

In terms of possibly finding another church, I would recommend giving yourself at least a year off from any church activity. Then if you wish, go church-shopping. Do your research and come up with a list of area churches that seem appealing to you. Visit a variety of them. If you find one you like, feel free to attend for as long as you wish before joining. The mainstream Christian churches will not be in a rush to sign you up. They will give you the time and space to make up your own mind about that.

I would recommend the ELCA Lutherans, the United Methodist Church, the Presbyterian church, and the Episcopal church. Coming from Mormonism you want to be careful to avoid the more rigid, controlling denominations and sects.

Good luck and do let us know how things proceed.

Thank you for the suggestions and great ideas! Last few weeks were very difficult, but now seeing past that we have a lot to look forward too. I'm certain upon receipt of the letter in SLC the local Bishop will reach out, thinking of heading that off with an email early next week confirming our intention based on doctrinal issues. Can't start as a false church and then turn into a true church when the foundation wasn't real to begin with!

Thoughts?

A a family with four kids are out of the cult! What a great first post.

Congratulations !!!!!

As for writing a letter to the bishop or not it is completely up to you. If you don't want to be bothered, write to the Bishop and confirm it. If you want to try to get others to think, you can stay silent and argue with them when they come.

There is no right or wrong way. There is the easy way were you refuse to engage them. There is the loud and noisy way where you are obviously "decieved by lucifer" and mostly ignored. Do what you feel you need to do.

Reading that just gave my day a big boost. So happy for you. Made me remember last night watching rescued wild animals being set free again. Yay!

Wow, way to go! Good luck with everything.

Its a journey...too often it becomes a bit like jumping right into another marriage before the last one has even cooled off...though christianity might seem like a welcome port from the storm go slow...keep in mind its been 2000 years without a peep...there is little solid evidence of christ other than warm fuzzies...even joe cud invoke warm fuzzies...billions have been made by hucksters selling hope...and thats all they are selling...private jets and large cathedrals cost money...seems its just the high cost of selling hope to those needing something anything to hang onto...jmo...ymmv