Read the CES letter on a loud speaker on Temple Square's grounds on a day when downtown is super busy; perhaps a sale at the EVIL CULT Mall or something like that.

non-faith promoting firesides-- as in bonfire, beer and a tune.
LDS Inc hates it when people "study the gospel" in groups they can't control.

All I had to do to get ex'd was become inactive for 7 years. At about the 7 year mark I became engaged. I moved in with my fiancee about a week or two before our wedding. During that week or two a couple of men in suits that I'd never met showed up at my front door. They handed me a letter announcing a meeting they told me to show up for. It was what they refer to as a court of love. Apparently they gave me the big X at that meeting.

I resigned years ago, but this made me think that a wayward Mormon, who they would actually come after, should keep a resignation letter by the front door, in the glove compartment, in the wallet next to the condom, so that if they do show up...just hand it to them and say "and that's the end of that discussion" then close the door slowly with a wicked smile.
Oh and make sure the condom falls out in front of them.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 04/22/2016 10:21AM by lapsed.

Write a hit about the treasure seeking businessman Joseph Smith, the rock in the hat, the Kinderhook plates and his 34 wives. Then the destruction of the printing press and on to Brigham Young.

Dunno how much text can fit into one song but that should be sufficient.

Maybe use Runnells quote in the refrain: Explore your doubts. Resolve your doubts. Doubt is the beginning to knowledge and wisdom.

Oh, and if he gets X'd he must record.

Good idea. Maybe he could condense the CES letter into a song? That should do it.

He probably already is excommunicated..... he just doesn't know it.

The entire CES letter in a song. That would be a really long song. I would much rather break it down.

I have a couple of ideas. I'm a fan of blues so...

-The Rock in the Hat Boogie.

-Nauvoo mansion blues. A song about Emma kicking out your newest maid/mistress.

-How do I Repent From the Truth. This could be a pretty sick ballad.

-Spiritual Eyes

-Joseph's flaming sword ;)

-Abraham's Papayras.

-Translation, Revelation, Masturbation(oh my!)

Hmm I think the sheer informational density of the letter would be great for a "Hamilton"-style rap piece.

Or a Gilbert and Sullivan patter song.

Or a long story song like Alice's Restaurant...

Stand up in fast & testimony mtg & say "The church isn't true & f*ck you all."
THAT should pretty much do it reaLLy quick !!

Say that his song, " She's so high", was referring to Emma Smith being on drugs when she chose to marry Joseph.

He could set my long Joseph Smith poem to music. Since I've already taken care of the lyrics, all he has to do is come up with a catchy tune.

If he doesn't want to resign, all he has to do is let people know he has formally joined another church. The Holy Handbook of Antioch says that's grounds for excommunication.

A) pencil out a book
B) get a ghost writer to finish
C) book tour

Oh, the book is about how Mormonism fucks up lives

Does Tal Bachman want to be excommunicated?

I saw that thread of his the other day, but I thought it was more in the vein of wondering why he HADN'T been excommunicated, given that he was pretty public about his current nonmormon lifestyle.

This is my observation, not trying to bash Tal as I think many of us here share this feeling to some extent.....

I don't think he wants to be ex'd. I think he wants the attention he would get if the church tried to ex him.

I would feel the same way. I removed my name, but if they would have come after me to ex me, I think I would have liked the attention....gives one a chance to stand up to them, toy with them, allow others to see how they treat members that lose faith, etc.

If I started getting love bombed now, I think I would like it to some extent...at first at least. Feels good to speak and smile in their face while they stare, dumb founded.

I see the same in posts here....people ask why they aren't being love bombed and many kind of want it, some even say they miss it....there's a feeling in the experience that we like....a sort of validation perhaps?

If someone wants out, its easy to be ex'd or just resign. When one wonders, publicly, why the church isn't pursuing them for excommunication or to bring them back to the fold, I think there is a different end being sought.....and it can apply to any of us, not just Tal.

Start handing out the CES letter and other subversive materials at the COB.

...with a guitar and an amp, and sing a parody that he's written to the tune of "She's So High" titled "It's A Lie."

randyj Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> ...with a guitar and an amp, and sing a parody
> that he's written to the tune of "She's So High"
> titled "It's A Lie."


That is perfection.

Develop a same-sex attraction.

There ya go! Marry the drummer!

Or he could start marketing The Joseph Smith Jr butt-plug.

There is a precedent, of sorts, too:

http://whyweprotest.net/threads/not-a-joke-l-ron-hubbard-buttplugs.24468/

Have a great weekend everyone :-D

Tom in Paris

Why doesn't he just do what all the rest of us do and and send in our resignation letter? Or is his point that he wants
to be excommunicated with all the bells and whistles that
Mormondumb can produce for him? He just wants the attention? I'm at a loss to understand his plea for excommunication when it is in his power to excommunicated himself? Please someone, explain it to me.

I think the key is to publish -- either on the Internet, or write a book! :-)

Marry another bloke.

He should be just shy of his 15th birthday. Tell them it's only for building family alliances and so you can take care of him.

Remind them that just because you're married, it doesn't mean you're having sex.

If they ask you if you are having sex, tell them it's too sacred to talk about.

why would anyone want to give them the pleasure of excommunication. Just resign already.

Go back to church and teach Mormon doctrine, ORIGINAL Mormon doctrine. Go up on the pulpit for F&T and spout all the stuff Joseph taught about plural marriage, etc. Move on to Brigham's ideas and teachings. Find a copy of "Mormon Doctrine" by McConkie and start preaching out of it. Nothing like beating them at their own game. Nothing you would preach would be anti-Mormon, just original doctrine. They seem to especially dislike talking about and talking to Mother in Heaven. End your "testimony" in the name of Heavenly Mother. I think that would seal the deal. Just keep going to different wards with this routine and I can pretty much guarantee that Tal will be ex-communicated forth with. And in his 'Court of Love" he could ask what is wrong with giving a testimony based on true doctrine.

"Decorate" the SL Temple exterior...



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 04/22/2016 11:07PM by GNPE.