There, I said it. Most of you will not get it and that is how it shoul be. I am thankful for that. For a few of us it is agonizing to find a card that says nothing. Just seems like a guilt ridden day for the 1% of us and some mothers know how to exploit that.

http://m.imdb.com/title/tt4824302/

Now they made a movie out of it.

This is better —

http://m.imdb.com/title/tt0081186/

& it has a quasi-remake, which I haven't seen.

http://m.imdb.com/title/tt1434435/

At least they're horror movies. The new one has romantic comedy written all over it! At least "Holiday Inn" didn't make a song about it or Father's Day!

IN B4 Opie finds out about the Hallmark - Valentines Day connection

Opie rilly not gonna like

I have that on good authority from a mattress company.

I grew up watching the Hallmark movie specials. They were something to look forward to because they were quality programming.

Hallmark has built its reputation on sentimentality. Some of us are just more sentimental I guess.

My mother's birthday fell on Mother's Day every 3-4 years. So for me it was a double whammy.

But one I actually enjoyed. Her mother was born on Leap Year, so that was another unique birthday to celebrate every four years (the off years were either a day late or a day early hihi.)

I have a brother born on traditional Veteran's Day, who is a veteran. Another bro born on the traditional Labor Day, another veteran.

Visited the Hallmark shopping mall when visiting Kansas City several years ago. It is a glorified, overpriced shrine to capitalism. But so are other well appointed shopping centers in the Kansas City metro area. It is a major tourist attraction there.

For various reasons, and throughout much of my life, I have spent many hours looking for holiday cards (including Mother's Day cards) that wouldn't make me feel like a hypocrite if I selected them.

It is with mixed emotions that I report what I have learned is the truth of life...

...this particular problem DOES steadily decrease, and WILL approach "zero," at some point in time...

It is a bit startling when you first begin to realize that this particular problem no longer exists.

I get it. I believe my mother was a narcissist.

It was SUPER important to her to get cards and gifts on her holidays. And I went along with it, as if it was my duty.

But the cards were selected very carefully.

I always chose a card that said something like "I hope you have a day as wonderful as you are."

Well, my mom has been gone for 16 years now. We had a difficult, strained relationship during my formative years. But I still miss her, and miss the friendship we developed after I became an adult.

After I accepted her for her shortcomings and imperfections it helped me to have more compassion for her than I did as a young girl. She didn't know how to give love, and wasn't a nurturer.

But I was able to forgive her in time. And see her as the hurting child she probably always was, who suffered under an extremely controlling father who was emotionless unless he was angry and disciplining his daughters.

My mum was probably a narcissist as well. An actress for most of her life, who excelled at speech and drama. She was a frustrated actress at that, especially for marrying young and having a large family. Her children she would say in later years were her trade-off. She still didn't really relate to us very well.

But I still miss her. Mother's Day just makes me miss her a little bit more because I can't bring her back to tell her that I love her. Or wish her a happy birthday all over again.

So I honor her memory as best as I can. I used to opine for a different family when I was a little girl. There were times I would pretend I was adopted, because my parents didn't understand me very well, or were there for us kids. But as I aged so did my relationship with my parents mature and mellow. It didn't make up for what we lacked as children, but it didn't matter so much by the time they were deceased. I was able to let go of most of what had been a painful past, and developed a new way of relating to them that fostered integrity and mutual respect for each other.

Out of all my parents children I was the only one who was there for my mom in her last weeks, months and years she knew she could call on me to have someone who really cared about her. No one else really did after her mother died. So I was only too happy to be there for her. Now she's gone I just wish she could've lived a few more years. Cigarettes, poor lifestyle habits and no ability to self-care cost her years in longevity.