When I read about you poor souls that still attend Mormon meetings it makes my skin crawl remembering how bloody awful it was to sit through Mormon Chruch Meetings. I think I would prefer to have a boil on my B hole than to attend another Mormon church meeting of any kind. LDS church meetings as we all know are horrible and without any redeeming value.

How do you manage to continue to attend? I feel so fucking sorry for you.

I can't do it often. I only attend when one of my kids needs me. And truthfully, I take half a Valium before hand. Boner.

I close my eyes and disassociate myself from the meeting. I visualize more pleasant surroundings. I slow myself down to my alpha brainwave level and enjoy.

I would like to understand how you do it, too. I mean, how do you put your innocent little children into that Hell-put? How do you expect them to deal with Mormon abuse, when you can not? Do you think children are too young to care about Truth or Love? Do little children still think bullying is OK, if an adult is doing the bullying in the name of God?

How can you throw your own children under the bus, with a clear conscience? I'm being perfectly serious, in asking this question.

Clearly, not everyone disconnects in the same manner or with the same intensity. It's also about priorities. What is extremely important takes presidence over some inconveniences
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When I look at the Big Picture of Religions in general and all of their teaching techniques that establish their World View and their definition of right and wrong, along with the traditional rituals, some of which are very gruesome, I find Mormonism to be on the mild to medium side.

I have no interest in attending, however, I did not have any problem going to the ward house for my husband's funeral and associating with the members that attended.

I would have to have some very compelling reason to attend a Sunday meeting, however. Extremely compelling. Right now, I cannot imagine what that would be.

Somewhat OT, but when growing up in New Mexico, my brothers and I would go fishing on Sunday, but we'd have to go to Mass first.

One church had a 5:00am mass for people that had to work, so we would go then.

9 out of 10 times the assigned altar boys didn't show up and we'd get drafted.

The priest was a real nice guy that we'd do it on a moments notice, so in turn we'd tell him we're going fishing after mass and ask if could speed things up a little.

A "normal" mass usually takes between 45 to 60 minutes including a sermon and communion.

The fastest we were out the door and headed to the fishing stream was under 25 minutes, nothing was left out, it was only speed.

Some of the parishioners would look at each other and ask what had happened.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/21/2016 05:02PM by tumwater.

That was a fun story. Thanks for the giggle!

There's not a single scripture in which Jesus laughs. I bet if one of the apostles had told him this story, we'd have the second shortest scripture, "Jesus laughed."

I'd think more highly on the Bible if such a verse was in it.

But there are some passages where he tells a joke to get his point over. Like the one about the salt losing its saltiness, or putting a light under a bucket, or having a log in one's eye, or pulling a camel through a needle's eye.

No, well there is scripture telling us that God laughs. There is also no scripture where Jesus is told a joke that would reasonably be expected to be funny and yet does not laugh. I suspect the reason there is no scripture with Jesus laughing is that we don't need it.

We don't need it - spot on.

I don't mind the first meeting because (a) I attend with my TBM wife, which saves her a lot of grief ("Where's Mr. getbusylivin?"), and (b) we often run into friends before and after. I'm talking about non-fanatical friends with whom we socialize--sometimes we'll invite them to dinner etc.

I sit near the door; the prospect of a quick exit helps a lot. I carry a small notebook in which I make shopping and to-do lists--it gets a workout during SM. I also use it to plan more substantive activities, such as planning projects for my (online) clients. I find that the drone of SM in the background helps me accomplish a lot toward planning my work-week.

Afterwards I give the Mrs. a smooch and head out the door--she stays for all three meeting, me just the first. It's about a 12-block walk back to our place from the chapel. I love walking alone--it's a great start to my week.

I bet many think that you are so enthralled with the message (at least that's what it's called in the church we attend) that you are jotting it down verbatim! Ha!

And as for Jesus not laughing? Does anyone ever laugh in the bible? I think the editors must have thought any laughter should be edited out.

Does anyone ever laugh in the Bible? Yes, they do - here is a list of Bible verses containing the word laugh or laughter:

Genesis 17:17, Genesis 18:12-15; Genesis 21:16; 2 Kings 19:21; 2 Chronicles 30:10; 2 Chronicles 30:10; Nehemiah 2:19; Job 5:22; Job 8:21; Job 9:23; Job 12:4 Job 22:19; Job 29:24; Job 41:29; Psalms 2:4; Psalms 22:7; Psalms 37:13; Psalms 52:6; Psalms 59:8; Psalms 80:6; Psalms 126;2; Proverbs 1:26; Proverbs 7:22; Proverbs 14:13 Proverbs 29:9; Ecclesiastes 2:2, Ecclesiastes 3:4, Ecclesiastes 3:4; Ecclesiastes 7:3; Ecclesiastes 7:6, Ecclesiastes 10:9, Isaiah 37:22, Ezekiel 23:32, Matthew 9:24, Mark 5:40, Luke 6:21; Luke 6:21, Luke 6:25, Luke 8:53, James 4:9.

I made this list by using the search function at http://www.kingjamesbibleonline.org/ .

But unfortunately, laugh in the KJV Bible seems to be mostly used about laughing at somebody, or "laugh to scorne" as King James says it.

To find texts about happy laughing, we can search rejoice, merry, glad, joy, merriment - and possible other terms of the same kind.

Interesting point, that laughter is often used derisively; a tool for domination. I hate that kind of laughter. I believe I out grew it by 8th grade.

Here's a story I read in a joke compilation, and it haunts me to this day because of how open ended I think it is, and how it is easy to take wrong, at least in my opinion.

"A very successful businessman, wealthy, personally impressive and with an excellent reputation in his community, needed an assistant to accompany him to an important meeting. All the usual staff members who normally would do so were all out, for one reason or another, and so the gentleman selected a very junior staff member.

"They were in the businessman's limousine, heading up Park Ave. in the heart of Manhattan. While at a red light, with pedestrian streaming past them in a cross walk, the businessman suddenly rolled down his window and yelled out, 'Hey baby, you in the maroon coat! You are one hot babe! How about coming along with us to get a drink?!'

"The young assistant was shocked to his core, as was the young lady in the maroon coat. What was doubly shocking to the young assistant was that the young woman was decidedly plain, somewhat overweight and was carrying herself as if she agreed with his assessment.

"As she scurried away, the businessman grinned at the young assistant as he rolled up his window. 'I bet she remembers this day and I hope it makes her feel better about herself!'


To this day I cannot come up with an explanation as to why that story was in a joke book. What if people took it to mean that it's funny to make 'ugly' people think they can pass for 'pretty'? Optimistically I tell myself that it was simply in the wrong book, that it should have been in a collection of stories about how to try to be nice to people.

Then of course I wonder how the story would turn out if the girl in the maroon coat had turned to the limo and opened the door.

Black & White is always so much easier...

I'm atheist and am not trying to plug a particular book, but there's one by James Martin that is very good. I've only read parts, but it's kind of a breath of fresh air against stern religious stereotypes. It's called "Between Heaven and Mirth: Why Joy, Humor, and Laughter Are at the Heart of the Spiritual Life". It's well-written and for people so inclined, makes suggestions about how to incorporate joy and levity in prayer.