Posted by:
had them
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Date: May 25, 2016 08:45PM
http://exmormon.org/phorum/read.php?2,1821583OP, I don't think that that question can do you any good. How can you make it worth it?
Lighten up on yourself. Four kids are a lot of work, but it won't last forever. You don't have to be perfect to love them and let them know it. It also sounds like you need some "alone time" to detox from the day when you get home, then do some dad time. It also helps if you don't have all four at once. One-on-one time where one of you watches three of them, and the other does something special with one. Rotate through them, both parents each get each kid on his or her own. Use a spreadsheet if needed. Might take two-four weeks to do all, then start over. The point is, you get to know each other, share unique moments.
You can also have a date night - every week or every other week, where the kids all spend the night with a trusted sitter or family member. It can be an all-day Saturday thing where they won't spend a night elsewhere.
You do sound like you're in a rut, the same old routine, week after week, where there's too much going on for any real intimacy on a personal level with individual family members. Pull out Excel or similar and see how you can add variety, alone time for both parents to recharge batteries, alone time for just the parents, alone times with each kid to help them discover themselves, and you. Hiking, a meal, the park or zoo, dirt bikes! bike bikes, swimming hole, it doesn't matter. No one is going to organize this for you, dad. Get your life back.
Best to you.