You cannot follow the crowd and be your own person at the same time. If you follow the crowd you abdicate free will choice to someone else and blindly follow what they order you to do.

What if your true self is a follower?

That's not a sarcastic question. Some personalities and temperaments are happiest letting others make the decisions, make the rules, set the goals. And there are enough people like that to keep the world's religions in business.

I can accept that you believe that to be true. I must, however, maintain my position as I believe it to be true. Please maintain your position as I respect your right to do so.

I agree with Mutt. Most people are born sheep.

A few of us are goats.

Then there are wolves (who fleece the sheep).

A sheep needs a shepherd to move them from pasture to pasture to be happy.


I think desertman is in the minority. His great thought for today is certainly true for us goats!

I agree. You have to be true to yourself. Do what's right regardless of what others think. You almost have to have a "Don't give a shit" attitude. Not about caring for others, but not caring what others think. It limits your amount of friends, but the friends that you have are true friends.

"Any more than one true friend and you're just showing off."
--Judic West, Booze hound

I submit we are more than likely 'always' in a group no matter what we choose to believe.

I will admit when it comes to 'spiritual' beliefs my 'group' is small, however, there is a group!

I would not say I 'follow' a group/crowd, I just have similar beliefs with many individual 'groups/crowds' that exist in our society.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 11/24/2016 02:48PM by spiritist.

I'm an atheist, which makes me a minority in America. It made me a hated minority in Mormonism. But I can't change myself into a theist, no matter the punishment. Spurned, disinherited, loathed, I got it all. But enough about family.

You ain't that rare. There's a lot of atheists nowadays.

I am also an atheist.

I've always said you're either a believer, a non-believer or a hypocrite.

My sister is in the latter category. She says she'd say she's an atheist if she weren't such a hypocrite.

We need to understand that popularity is another Mormon lie, used to keep the members firmly in the flock.

"Every member a missionary."
"Bring your friends and neighbors"
"Spread the Word, hand out BOM's"
"Let your light shine!"

A Mormon is fussed-over and revered, if he/she brings in new recruits. The cult is geared for extroverts, even show-offs. I can't think of anyone as obnoxious and intrusive as a Mormon missionary.

News Flash! You don't have to have tons of friends, in order to be happy! My Mormon friends shunned me when I resigned, and I resigned quietly and peacefully. I cried for months. Soon, I realized that it was a relief to have them out of my life. They were critical, controlling unhappy, and very, very demanding of my time. Their lies, racism, sexism, elitism, fear and negativity towards life used to depress me. The phone would ring, and I would cringe! If those were friends, then I'm happier being friendless.

You don't have to be married and/or joined at the hip to someone to be happy. Tell that to a Mormon who believes you have to be sealed in the temple. Some of the happiest people I know are single, and some of the most miserable are married.

A university (I think it was Harvard) did a study, Nation-wide, on happiness and marital status. The results were #1 happiest were single women, #2 married men, #3 single men, #4 married women.

Another study I read about in the newspaper, showed that the average man has 2-3 real friends, that they feel close to. For women it was 3-4 friends.

I have been both popular and solitary, and there are benefits of both. I have sacrificed many relationships, in order to avoid abuse, and to regain my human rights and free will choice.

It's fairly easy to pick the non-conformists out in a crowd, which of course means they are conforming to something. One of life's little ironies.

While there are people who believe they are nonconformists but are just conforming to a smaller group, there are nonconformists who don't do that.

It depends on where the crowd is going. I'm sure they aren't always wrong. Perhaps the crowd just received a bit of news that I was late in learning about. The crowd may also be people who have already gone through a certain experience, so I might benefit from their experience.

I am definitely INFLUENCED by the crowd. When I buy things online, I read reviews. When I'm looking for someone to do electrical work, I ask around and I check Angie's List. I'll try games or TV shows that everyone loves - I don't necessarily stick with them though. To me, the crowd is statistical data that I can use.

So I guess I don't just blindly follow a crowd. I usually do my own research as well. And I read comments by people who disagree with "the crowd". I am definitely INFLUENCED by the crowd, I don't just follow it blindly.

People are pack animals. There is a social order and hierarchy in human relationships; we need each other which is why communities form and societies exist. Laws are made to govern, without which the social order would break down.

Whether or not one considers themselves a conformist or non-conformist, we are still like pack animals. Maybe we choose what group to associate with - of likeminded such as social networking provides.

In the larger community we all have to conform to some degree, or we'll be ostracised and banned - for breaking laws or such. That's why our prisons are overcrowded - for those who try to buck the system and fail because they believed themselves above the law, or the law doesn't apply to them.

I stood out like a sore thumb when traveling through China on my way to Japan. In the Communist country everyone is a conformist to the government dogma or might lose their job, their freedom, possibly their lives.

Just traipsing through the airport it felt so stifling in its utter orderliness. On the one hand, there was a sense that the government has such control over everyone's actions no one has the luxury to question or challenge the status quo. Those who thrive there do not challenge the system. They are silent.

It was stifling just to pass through that, without being singled out as the foreigner that I was. I didn't stay to visit. Only stayed overnight in a government owned hotel going and returning from my trip to the Orient. Would I do that again? Maybe. It had the best price airfare, and safety wise is no worse than the best out there. The food on the Chinese government owned airlines was sickening though, would not eat it again. And the crew such as stewardesses possibly pilots were able to smoke, which filled up the cabin during the flight, while the passengers were forbidden to light up.

Weird, to say the least. :/

They also made a point to break my pink Ralph Lauren suitcase, going and coming, each direction. One zipper one way. The other zipper coming back. That pink suitcase must've been too much of a "statement" lol of originality or "non-conformity." Either that or they break every single suitcase that passes through their security.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 11/25/2016 09:44AM by Amyjo.

I spent three weeks in China and my experience was different.