I'm in the kitchen in so much pain my daughters think I'm a 4 year old. I didn't know I had NO voice. I've snuck around all my life in fear I would be in trouble for anything. That was how bad I was 2 years ago in Salt Lake City, Utah. I'm getting my voice and if the admin deletes my post okay. At least I said it. Zoe

Zoe...

I think you need to talk to someone qualified about what, inside yourself, you are going through now.

I don't know where you live, or what resources are available in your area, but you might start with the Suicide Hotline at: 1-800-273-8255 (1-800-273-TALK), because they will be able to direct you to your local, easiest-to-access, help sources.

We do care about you...

...and we do want you to be able to connect with those who will be most able to help you, where you are right now.

Even if you do not feel that you are suicidal, if you call the above number, they will undoubtedly be able to direct you to those nearby, who can help in ways that we, here on RfM, simply cannot.

Please call the number and talk to them. I know you deeply need to talk to someone, and this is probably the best place to begin.

((((Zoe)))) love and support to you. Love, Aquarius

Ditto this^^^^

Zoe, there are many people here at RfM who care about you. You can talk to us, or, as Tevai said, you can call and get professional help. Sending good thoughts and vibes your way. Most sincerely, edzachery

I'm sorry the admins mistook you for someone else. It happened to me a lot when I first came here. I honestly thought that Mormonism maybe could have some kind of socially redeeming value, so my questions would just disappear.

If you stick around, you'll see the horrendous psychological toll this "religion" has had on many people here. They need a safe place to work through their healing.

You do indeed have a voice. Don't let them win. They stole your voice, but you didn't steal it back. It's always been yours.

Zoe, why do you feel that you have no voice? I've been reading through your post history. I see that you've made some good, self-affirming moves in your life, such as leaving the Mormon church, purging toxic people, and getting counseling. What's wrong?

I agree with other posters on this thread. A question:

4 year olds are often happy. So, Why are you in pain do you know? Is it physical pain? Is it in reaction to physical pain? If physical pain is part of you, then you need to go to urgent care or emergency after calling your primary dr and following their directions. Physical pain that changes your voice so you and others notice, needs drs help to address underlying physical problems in order to alleviate symptoms. I know, I understand my voice gets whisper soft and I couldnt even think long sentences when I needed surgery for appendicitis. And it did sound differently, it meant there was a situation that needed to be supported. If you are in physical pain and your voice even changed to the point you can't use long sentences- you definitely need to see a health support provider for your body's maintenance. After surgery until scar heals, or recovering from flu



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 12/21/2016 12:59AM by paintinginthewin.

Zoe, I'm in trouble ALLLLLLL the time for stuff I say.

And, I don't give a shit! I say it anyway.

People started listening to me when I started swearing.


Zoe--Beautiul name, by the way.

Zoe,

Your voice is important. Shout from the rooftops!

Get help for your physical pain!

What do you have? I have a painful sore throat--and have lost my voice--right now, due to a cold. My daughter has been hopping up and down with a horrible toothache and root-canal. These afflictions are not serious, and will pass, hopefully before Christmas. But--is your pain something serious? Do you have chronic pain? Please see a doctor, or go to Instacare!

Pain makes you feel isolated. The non-pain world goes on all around you, and no one knows the pain you are feeling, all alone, inside your black cloud. Even chronic pain lets up from time to time, and you live for those better times.

Those in pain can feel rejected by others, and rejected by life. You need to spit in the face of those Mormons who believe that pain and illness is God's way of punishing sinners. When I was very sick, the bishop and others threatened me that my illness would get WORSE, if I didn't start paying tithing and attending church, again. That is so cruel! That is so false! Pain is random--that's all.

Don't add to your pain. What I mean is, don't beat yourself up, don't feel responsible for your pain, don't feel you are a burden to others, and don't feel you are "less than" those who are healthier.

You do have a voice, and you write that you are getting yours back. We aren't supposed to write about politics, here, but maybe I can say that many us women are sad, these last couple of months, and we feel that we will never achieve equality. We need to pull together, and never give up!

Zoe, will you please check back with us?

Tevai is right. We love you and will help any way we can, but you may need to talk to someone close to your vicinity who is a health professional. Hang in there! We'll be here for you.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 12/21/2016 08:59PM by aquarius123.