Posted by:
focidave
(
)
Date: February 18, 2017 12:00PM
I feel like I might be a little behind on this one, but did anyone else see the two articles in the New Era about children being victims when a parent looks at pornography?
https://www.lds.org/new-era/2017/02/pornographys-innocent-victims?lang=enghttps://www.lds.org/new-era/2017/02/anguish-for-my-father?lang=engThe first one has a list of how a child should act if they find out a parent looks at pornography. It seems kind of weird, like it was originally intended for something else (like a real addiction), but they reappropriated it. There's a line in there about how the child should set boundaries with that parent (which sounds like just the sort of thing kids do). Perhaps the creepiest bit of the article though is the paragraph at the end that counsels you to rat out your friends and siblings if they look at pornography (because you "love" them).
The second one is a story that doesn't sound made up at all about a girl who found out her dad looked at porn (and also never learned how to delete his Internet browser history) and how even though she felt like a victim, she learned that her dad wasn't such a bad guy. She's such a Molly Mormon that she says that as a teenager she didn't get along with her dad, not because she is a normal teenager, but because she was such a victim of his pornography usage.
"You are not in control of your parent’s pornography use, so don’t burden yourself with feelings of responsibility, shame, or guilt," it says. Is this something kids would really think? Dad's looking at porn! It's all my fault? If it were some other "sin" (say your dad secretly had coffee now and then), would they feel like "victims"? What about if a family member leaves the church? Are you a victim because your kids or siblings don't want to be members of the church any more? When I was on a mission, and an investigator didn't want to join the church, did that make me a victim? Just because somebody does something you don't like, it doesn't make you a victim.
My problem with these stories is that they're creating a narrative of victimization, but there just isn't one there. Youth who read this are more likely to feel like they're victims if you keep telling them they are, and that will just make it all the harder for them to recognize real victims of non-culturally-constructed problems. Mormons don't need another reason to feel like they're the biggest victims in the world.
Edited 4 time(s). Last edit at 02/18/2017 12:16PM by focidave.