I've also wanted a Nerf machine gun with dyed nerf bullets so I could go "postal" without actually hurting anyone.
I make do with Solid Snake's VR missions, though. There is something oddly satisfying about dropping a virtual grenade on top of a virtual (and really stupid) soldier walking in a virtual hole in the ground.
Tomorrow I get to have some of the nerves in my back burned off with a giant needle. That should be better than a three hour orgasm on a rollercoaster.
They just said it'll be highly unpleasant and I'll be pretty sore for a couple days. But if it takes care of my long term back pain, it's totally worth it.
"Jesus Christ on a Rubbermaid Cross". That quote is the funniest thing I've heard all day! Do you mind if I use it? But yes, I often want to beat people with whatever I have on hand LOL Things will get better, I promise :)