Posted by:
RubySeven
(
)
Date: May 26, 2017 12:23AM
I posted on here a while ago, and a couple people said I should give an update at some point, so here it is. For anyone who doesn't remember me, I'm a high schooler living in utah, and I'm personally atheist and exmo, even though I'm pretending to be TBM to be safe. I was called through a "strong spiritual prompting" by my bishop to be laurel president a while back, and I accepted it to avoid suspicion. After being president for a couple months, it's becoming more and more uncomfortable. Every week before mutual, my leader takes me to go to the houses of all the inactive girls and invite them, which feels very wrong (but luckily they're standing their ground and not giving in). I was put on our girls camp comitee, and being one of the older girls going, I'm in charge of "spiritual thoughts" each morning we're there, which also feels wrong. Every month, the class presidents have to make a list of all the inactive kids in our class, come up with a plan to get them to come, execute it, and tell our bishop how it went, which is sooo uncomfortable.
Basically, it's just a kind of lonely, unsettling situation right now. I know there's other people like this around me, but I don't know how to find them. I wish there was an easier way to talk and vent (RfM is great, but a public internet forum isn't the best place to go for support all the time). I think I'm just going to have to hold on and wait it out till I'm off to college and I'm free to make my own decisions (and no worries, BYU is out of the question ;)