thing. Ive never went through except for baptisms but the temple was always used to suppress me for example having to stand outside for every single wedding and the family having a superiority complex over me. I never saw what went on until i was 30 years old looking on youtube and it horrified me and i listened to death metal music so called 'satanic music' but the endowment horrified even ME. What i really want to know from people that have actually gone through to give me extra assurance is, is it worse to do it rather than watching on youtube? And did it feel wrong or evil? Or did some of you even think it was legit? Ive heard some horror stories on here but i want to be extra sure to myself that the whole temple thing is total bullshit because i never did it myself. This might help me to move on past a certain point. Thanks for reading again.



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 09/04/2017 10:15PM by badassadam.

Well howdy, Badass! Yes, the temple is weird! It's actually gotten kinder and gentler. When we used to receive the tokens, we'd take a death oath...rather than reveal (name of token, like "The First Token of the Aaronic Priesthood") I would suffer my life to be taken. Then ritualistically, everyone would gesture slitting our throats with the thumb of our right hands, then our chests, and finally, disemboweling ourselves. Horny Joe copied these penalties from the Masons. These "bloody penalties" were removed in about 1990.

As to your question, when I first went through, a good friend acted as my "escort." Generally, the escort is a family member, like a parent. As I was the only convert in my family, my escort was a very good friend.

I knew almost nothing about the temple beforehand except that some people were shook up about the ceremony, someone told me the first time they went through they thought the symbolism was pagan. Someone else told me they felt the temple wasn't their church.

So, I figured it was different. I was also on a spiritual high and had long given up the hope of ever going to the temple because of my failure to quit jacking off (I'm sure you understand :) I had a more liberal bishop who said everyone he knew did the deed, and I was worthy, just slow down a bit.


So, Badass, I dressed in a suit with my new garments in an overnight bag. My friend met me and with recommends in hand, we went to the locker room. There were sets of cubicles around the lockers so I had complete privacy when stripping down.

At that time (I heard it's since been changed) I shipped a white poncho thing called a shield and verb me head. The shield was open at the sides so it mostly covered the nudity. I honestly didn't feel embarrassed by that part of the ceremony. I did look at my tighty-whities and figured I'd never wear them again.

After the locker room, I was led to the washing and anointing area. There, I sat in a chair with two temple workers. One dipped his fingers in water and touched various parts of my body. The worker never touched my genitles, but did run his finger swiftly over the top of my hips when doing one of the "blessings." Then, very similar annointings were done with olive oil--the head, the eyes, the mouth (that you may never speak guile), etc. I was then led into another cubicle where the two workers proceeded to dress me in the garment of the holy priesthood.

To do this, he opened the expandable neck on the top of the garment, and I stepped in it. Then, both workers lifted it up (inside the shield that was covering me), and completed dressing me in it. Promises about the garment and advice not to ever take it off (exceot when showering) were given to me. I walked back into the locker area with the garment under my shield, I proceeded to remove the shield and dressed in white pants, shirt, necktie, belt, socks, and slippers. I had the temple bundle (bag containing the robe, hat, apron, shash, and apron). We headed to the temple's chapel.

A slow dirge of hymns was being played by an elderly worker who had discovered the vibrato stop on the organ. This should have been a hint to get the fuck out, but I didn't.

Most of what happened next is the newer Endowment which you have seen on the videos. But, in my time, there was another Masonic step that has since been eliminated. In the older ceremony, when one gets up to the veil, one had to give the tokens "upon the 5-points of Fellowship." -- Ear to ear, breast to breast, etc. One hugged the worker close though the veil where the last token was given. The veil itself has the exact set of symbols on the garment--the workers' hands come through the slits of the veil. Originally, the garment had the slits sown into it, but now, just has the marks as thread slown in.

When I got into the Celestial Room, a couple of friends and my escort were waiting for me. One asked me (smiling) if the church was still true. Yes! I responded! I was very happy and my friends all took me out for dinner. And, I was finally wearing garments!

The disconnect happened when I started asking questions. You cannot talk about most of the temple outside the temple, so I would go and ask workers questions.

My first time in the Salt Lake Temple was amazing! It was so beautiful and this was THE temple. However, this temple uses live actors, not a movie. The actors playing all characters except for Satan wore white clothes. Ole Stan had on a cheap, black suit; he also had a blue apron with all sorts of Masonic symbols on it--square, compass, big G, trowel, and pilars. So I asked a temple worker why there were Masonic symbols on Satan's apron. Was the Endowment saying Masons were Satanic?

The worker cut me down with a look of shock and insisted they weren't Masonic symbols! (Sure, and a Star of David doesn't symbolize Judaism, or a cross Christianity, either!) of course, they were Masonic. So, I kept going and asking questions. For example, in the anointing room, the oil is contained in a large, stainless steal cow's horn. It has its own holder and looks like a steel Viking mead cup. I asked who consecrated the oil. I was told, "I don't know."

Eventually, I figured that if I went to the temple long enough, I'd understand it. So, I went 2-3 times a week and memorized the ceremony.

A couple of years later, I went through my crises of faith (which I've posted on before) beginning with Mark Hoffman blowing people up and the General Authorities being duped into buying forged documents. Shortly after was the last time I went to the temple where the young man was freaking out.

Sorry this is long, and if you have further questions, I'll do my best to answer them. Here's what I now know of the temple--

1. It's a controlling device to keep people in the cult. First the church begins by telling everyone how wonderful it is--over and over again.

2. Parents and friends are used to reinforce the wonderfulness of the temple. Badass, we're friends. Imagine if I kept telling you over and over again how wonderful a movie was, wouldn't you want to see it with me?

3. The church then makes everyone feel unworthy to go to the temple. Another control device--Men and women, are you touching yourselves? Do you have unclean thoughts? Are you worthy? Now, turn up the GUILT--I'm a wanker and not worthy! Guilt, shane, isolation, combined with thoughts that everyone else IS worthy. I think you see where I'm going with this. You and me Badass, we're bad men because we cuss, have impure thoughts, and gasp! Wack off! What they didn't tell us was that everyone else was doing the same thing! We just believed them. And, Badass, they lied to us.

4. The temple ceremony and significance are meaningless bullshit! It's designed to make each individual feel that they are the problem with unworthiness, not the ceremony. Hey Boner, you shit! You don't understand it because you're a jack-off! Boner, you're the problem. Boner you cuss! Boner, you have dirty thoughts! etc...

5. Every part of the temple ceremony is based on fear. If you take the garment off, if you reveal anything, if you fuck up in any way, if you mock God, "You'll be in MY power!" screams Satan.

So, just between us, Badass, everyone fucks up. Yep, you, me, Hie, Monson, your Dad, my Dad--everyone! The church knows this and plays the fear card over and over again. That's why when Mormons discovery the truth about how we've been manipulated and shamed we get furious with the Morg and its leaders.

So, Bro, I hope this post has helped you realize how the temple is designed to be controlling. And, Badass, I hope this helps you see the quality of the man you are. You figured it out long before I did. You are in recovery. You have nothing to fear from Mormonism--it's merely a shadow (Thanks, Sandra Tanner). Yeah, it's dark, but we're adults, Badass, we no longer fear the dark. And, we've got a good support group here.

Yes, we're sometimes crusty, but we've all made it out of a cult. Now, Badass, you, me, and everyone else here are free to live our lives as we define them.

And one last time, you are Badass Adam, you are fucking awesome, and you don't take shit from no one--including a sore Boner! Hugs!



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 09/04/2017 11:41PM by BYU Boner.

I was extremely tired from an overnight bus trip at the end of a work week. We didn't have neighborhood McTemples then.

I was very much underwhelmed. I kept wondering when the "spiritual high" was supposed to kick in. It never did, and I was sure that this was my fault. I had heard all kinds of things about seeing deceased ancestors, and I was on high alert in case my grandmothers showed up (they didn't) and I was disappointed about that. I probably missed some of the yapping that went on as I scanned the nooks and crannies, hoping to see my grandmas. I have been a fan of Victoria's Secret ever since.

I don't remember the vivid detail that Boner recalls, and I have attributed this to fatigue. I do remember a lot of silly fussing with garment parts - you shuffle one item from here, to there, and back again, and the temple workers get all lathered up if you don't get it quite right.

On my first time through, I had been told by the mishies that I would be asked a series of questions, and if I didn't get the answers letter-perfect, I would not be allowed out, and I was scared about that. There was a geezer with denture breath trying to coach me through the responses. I kept telling him, "Back off. I got this." He was pissed, and my friend who was escorting me whispered, "You aren't supposed to tell a temple worker to back off." But he was annoying the hell out of me. I was trying very hard to get it letter-perfect, as the mishies had taught me. Very nervous and edgy, and the geezer was distracting my focus.

The bit that Boner describes with the sideless poncho and anointing,before you get your first one-piece set of garmies is pretty much what I recall.

I could not, for the life of me, imagine how anybody could get a spiritual rush out of this nonsense. And when at last, you stagger out, you are supposed to be glowing or something, while I was just tired and bewildered.

After a lot of nonsense, you are suddenly in the Celestial Room, with everyone beaming at you and asking you, "Wasn't it SPESHUL??" And you are wondering "What the he!! just happened??"

Before my recommend expired, I went again, this time to a local McTemple with a friend, and it was just as silly. It was like little kids being initiated into a Big Kids' club, with secret passwords and handshakes, and heaven help you if you get them wrong.

I remember vividly what a big thing they made out of how NOW I was a certified Wearer of the Sacred Garmies, and how they aren't even to be put in the laundry with other dirty clothes. You were supposed to put them in a while pillowcloth, and never bleach them, because it wears them out faster. I bleached mine anyway, because I didn't want them to look old and ratty. I hung my laundry out to dry in nice weather, and I was very careful to hang my garmies on the inside lines where unauthorized eyes could not see them.

I got a major kick out of trying to check out other people's garmie lines, to see if they were in the Magic Club or not.

I never got anything spiritual out of it. I thought it was boring and silly. And I just assumed it was all my fault, for not being spiritual enough. And of course, you couldn't discuss it with anybody. Not until I found RfM did I found people who were as let-down as I was. And I found other women who had unsatisfactory experience trying to wear their bras OVER the garmies, which did not work out well for some of us, and I finally decided "What the hell??" and wore the bra underneath, which worked out much better.

As my overall disenchantment with the church grew, my garmies went into a brown paper grocery sack, which lived at the back of my closet for some time. In time, they got pitched into the trash.

I got a real thrill out of wearing them for a while, because now I was a Big Kid, but the thrill eventually wore off.

catnip Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I was extremely tired from an overnight bus trip
> at the end of a work week. We didn't have
> neighborhood McTemples then.
>
> I was very much underwhelmed. I kept wondering
> when the "spiritual high" was supposed to kick in.
> It never did, and I was sure that this was my
> fault. I had heard all kinds of things about
> seeing deceased ancestors, and I was on high alert
> in case my grandmothers showed up (they didn't)
> and I was disappointed about that. I probably
> missed some of the yapping that went on as I
> scanned the nooks and crannies, hoping to see my
> grandmas. I have been a fan of Victoria's Secret
> ever since.
>
> I don't remember the vivid detail that Boner
> recalls, and I have attributed this to fatigue. I
> do remember a lot of silly fussing with garment
> parts - you shuffle one item from here, to there,
> and back again, and the temple workers get all
> lathered up if you don't get it quite right.
>
> On my first time through, I had been told by the
> mishies that I would be asked a series of
> questions, and if I didn't get the answers
> letter-perfect, I would not be allowed out, and I
> was scared about that. There was a geezer with
> denture breath trying to coach me through the
> responses. I kept telling him, "Back off. I got
> this." He was pissed, and my friend who was
> escorting me whispered, "You aren't supposed to
> tell a temple worker to back off." But he was
> annoying the hell out of me. I was trying very
> hard to get it letter-perfect, as the mishies had
> taught me. Very nervous and edgy, and the geezer
> was distracting my focus.
>
> The bit that Boner describes with the sideless
> poncho and anointing,before you get your first
> one-piece set of garmies is pretty much what I
> recall.
>
> I could not, for the life of me, imagine how
> anybody could get a spiritual rush out of this
> nonsense. And when at last, you stagger out, you
> are supposed to be glowing or something, while I
> was just tired and bewildered.
>
> After a lot of nonsense, you are suddenly in the
> Celestial Room, with everyone beaming at you and
> asking you, "Wasn't it SPESHUL??" And you are
> wondering "What the he!! just happened??"
>
> Before my recommend expired, I went again, this
> time to a local McTemple with a friend, and it was
> just as silly. It was like little kids being
> initiated into a Big Kids' club, with secret
> passwords and handshakes, and heaven help you if
> you get them wrong.
>
> I remember vividly what a big thing they made out
> of how NOW I was a certified Wearer of the Sacred
> Garmies, and how they aren't even to be put in the
> laundry with other dirty clothes. You were
> supposed to put them in a while pillowcloth, and
> never bleach them, because it wears them out
> faster. I bleached mine anyway, because I didn't
> want them to look old and ratty. I hung my laundry
> out to dry in nice weather, and I was very careful
> to hang my garmies on the inside lines where
> unauthorized eyes could not see them.
>
> I got a major kick out of trying to check out
> other people's garmie lines, to see if they were
> in the Magic Club or not.
>
> I never got anything spiritual out of it. I
> thought it was boring and silly. And I just
> assumed it was all my fault, for not being
> spiritual enough. And of course, you couldn't
> discuss it with anybody. Not until I found RfM did
> I found people who were as let-down as I was. And
> I found other women who had unsatisfactory
> experience trying to wear their bras OVER the
> garmies, which did not work out well for some of
> us, and I finally decided "What the hell??" and
> wore the bra underneath, which worked out much
> better.
>
> As my overall disenchantment with the church grew,
> my garmies went into a brown paper grocery sack,
> which lived at the back of my closet for some
> time. In time, they got pitched into the trash.
>
> I got a real thrill out of wearing them for a
> while, because now I was a Big Kid, but the thrill
> eventually wore off.

Thats exactly what i thought when i saw the youtube videos, its like an initiation into the 8 year old tree club with the secret handshakes and passwords. I still cant believe how manipulated i got by all of this.

My mouth is wide open boner, hooooly shit you just rocked my mind i knew it was a control device of some kind i just had a feeling as a teenager and i was crucified my whole life by my family for it my whole fucking life i was crucified for not following everyone else. I appreciate it man for SOMEONE finally being straight and completely honest with me about the exactness of what is going on. Fuck this is a lot to take in i was manipulated so badly by the whole temple thing by my family for so many years that i returned to going back to church to give it a second shot and get them off my back. I KNEW something was very wrong with it all. Thanks boner im glad i found one honest man in the world that would tell it to me straight. What happened when you realized it was all a lie? What did you do?

I cried is the short answer, Adam. Then, I became a free man.

It's late, Badass. I've got to get some sleep. I'll post tomorrow.

Thanks for the compliment about the honesty. There are many honest and good people here, Adam. You are one of them.

Night boner i think its later where you are at then it is here.

BYU Boner Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> ...
> A slow dirge of hymns was being played by an
> elderly worker who had discovered the vibrato stop
> on the organ. This should have been a hint to get
> the fuck out, but I didn't.
> ...

Mr. B, it's a simple matter that those who play organ in the mormon church simply haven't been taught the right way to use vibrato. Try the following link as an example of excellent use of vibrato on the organ - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j0NFiSDvVzU .

And by the way boner i cant believe you said Hie fucks up that is downright heresy or blasphemy he is a smart dude.

You are right to question it. I did a video about this. LDS General Authority Admits The Temple Endowment Can Be Disturbing - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ePU4oYisTP0

Hans Mattsson (an area Authority in Europe) said that he had nightmares for a week after going through the Temple Endowment for the first time.

Richard E. Turley Jr. (a Church Historian) said that his daughter was "so disturbed" by the ritual that "she cried" in the Temple.

Many people are disturbed by it. Only people who are used to occult rituals find it to be normal.

Oh my god ive never seen that video. This is heavy stuff because my entire family is deep in this.

The Endowment gets worse as you go back in time to the founding of Mormonism. I have an audio recording of the Temple Endowment from 1984 - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nvGYH_S0DgA&list=PL0179692DF0B6487A

It includes the "penalties" where members pantomime cutting their throats, having their hearts ripped out of their chest, and slitting their torso open as penalties for breaking their Temple covenants.

(small nit-pick - that was Marlin K. Jensen discussing the temple session with his crying daughter)

Wow! Seems like that was that the (in)famous "Swedish Rescue" meeting. The transcript of that is very telling.

---

MJ: I remember sitting with our first daughter, actually, who went on a mission to
Germany, after her first temple endowment which I attended with her.

Question: When was that?

MJ: Pre‐90.

---

Why on earth would he mention 1990? (wink, wink!)

There are some links to more info about that meeting in the text description with that video, including the entire transcript (the video has audio of only a couple minutes of the meeting).

I may be the only one who will say this - I wasn't terrified. I thought it was weird watching a movie in the temple. I expected something more. I left thinking it was interesting. P.S. I was 21 when I went through when my dad was a bishop

The movie wasnt the terrifying part it was everything else. The cult gestures, the zombie chanting, the zombie prayers, the bizarre clothing, the weird veil stuff and weird handshakes. Nothing i learned in regular school could have prepared me for something like that.

Being a girl, it's even creepier... believe me..it is made clear that you (as a girl) have no power. You promise to adhere to the word of your husband as he adheres to God. You promise to be a good wife... you promise to obey.. you bow your head and say yes.. (although the men do that last bit as well)

When the prayer circle happens, the women have to veil their faces. As if we are not worthy enough to talk to god. We have to hide ourselves.. not good enough.. not worthy enough.. not pretty enough..

The whole time I was just basically concerned with 'getting it right'. I was desperate to belong, desperate to be good enough. And I was scared beyond measure that the highly spiritual temple workers would see through my disguise and know that I was not worthy.. that I wasn't supposed to be there.

I was terrified that someone would come and ask me to leave...
That if I did everything precisely right, they might not know I was unworthy..

There was nothing wrong with me ofcourse. I was a perfectly normal young woman doing the best she could. It was all cult tactics..

Now i know why my sisters are so weird. They were totally different before the temple and marriage.

I spoke with Marisa Calderwood who left the church with her husband about this before and she told me when she went through the endowment ceremony, she was literally scared.

I was TBM when I went through, just before my mission and couldn't believe how weird the experience was - nothing like I expected it would be. I didn't think it was evil although it did have a slight Rosemary's Baby like feel to it. I would say that the temple ceremony was more stupid than evil: stupid made up shit that was also incredibly boring, just like most things Mormon. It was another huge waste of time just like reading the made-up incredibly boring Book of Mormon, sitting through snooze inducing church meetings, etc. It was absolutely not a spiritual experience for me, just another useless waste of time to keep TBMs occupied and out of trouble, and used to guilt members into paying tithing and being obedient.

So to answer your question, the temple session was weird, stupid and boring but didn't really feel evil - maybe a little creepy with the washing and anointing touchy-feely stuff. I went as little as possible and thankfully got out of the cult when I was in my 30s.

Badass, I think you're freaking yourself out thinking too much about the Mormon church. If you don't think about it it doesn't exist.

When I was a little girl I fell asleep in the car after my family returned from a day-trip. My parents didn't wake me but let me sleep in the car that was parked on the street in front of our house. They forgot about me, locked up the house and went to sleep with me outside in the car. I woke up at about 2 AM, scared to death that I was alone in the car in the dark. It took all of my courage to get out of the car in the dark and run up my driveway to the front door of my house. It was locked and I couldn't get in. Standing outside alone in the dark I was sure I could see a witch coming towards me. I screamed and screamed until my father finally woke up and let me in.

I often think about that experience and how I created my own fear by imagining that a witch was after me. That's what you are doing - you are creating your own fear. The Mormon church is a silly made up religion. It has no control over you and no church "authorities" can tell you what to do. Remember that your thoughts are not reality - they're just thoughts. It's good that you are trying to work through things, but the less you think about the Mormon church the better off you will be.

I am freaking myself out but i feel i have to know what the hell everyone is into around me i guess i dont want to be totally ignorant.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 09/05/2017 04:34PM by badassadam.

Yeah, I understand. Just remember that they're involved in a silly, nonsense, meaningless, made up religion that is having a hard time retaining members. No need to be freaked out.

It would make a great scene from ... "Rosemary's Bishop"

the actual temple endowment on video on youtube is a post 1990 endowment version. I will agree that it is creepy. However, the pre 1990 version with the explicit death oaths, death penalties and attendant self inflicted mimicry of those explicit gory death penalties is notably more (MORE) creepy. That in conjunction with the pre 1990 abuse of being compelled to strip naked for uninvited touching and probing including in rather private areas by an ordnance worker for the washing and anointing warm up for the creepy endowment ceremony. saying that as some one who experienced it on a first hand basis.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xLLaJLX0EFM

Even creepier is the pre circa 1931 version which includes the oath of vengeance on the United States for the death of Joseph Smith et al - I guess Mountain Meadows wasn't good enough

Scripts of same can be found on the net, though it's been several years since I've looked for / viewed one

Woooh i never knew that one. Thanks for telling me.

A little late to the party, but I just wanted to add...

It didn't feel "evil." It felt silly.
Like an overgrown boys' clubhouse with pantomimed death gestures.
And a bit of fondling from the smelly old temple worker fart who did my washing & annointing.

Just silly. As in, "OMG, how stupid is this?"

you are right. the MORmON temple ceremony is silly, silly crap ......except that the MORmON Leaders tell the MORmON members to take that silly crap very seriously and then MORmONS do as they are instructed. Some more than others.

.....guess what else is silly! - having your wife and infant daughter brutally murdered MORmON temple penalty style by your MORmON fundie brothers who are emulating the life of MORmON founder (pervert) Joe Smith as closely as possible ( including trying to plural marry a 14 year old girl) and then doing a video that attempts to promote the (supposed) benefits of MORmON temple attendance !!!



https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JsZLZmCtwT4

the male person in the video appears to be Allen Lafferty, brother of Ron and Dan Lafferty, husband of Brenda Wright Lafferty

https://crimewatchdaily.com/2016/05/26/prophets-polygamy-and-punishment-killers-daughter-speaks-out/

"support from the other side of the veil"

HOW INSPIRING !!!!

must be the spiritual influence of Allen's (nearly decapitated) first wife whose brutal throat slash murder was inspired by the MORmON temple penalties !!! as carried out by his wonderful brothers.


ain't the MORmON temple great!!!!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T0wFt1r3zYg

Funny thing, it seems that being so embarrassed that he never showed his stupid face again would be far more appropriate action for Allen Lafferty than making a STUPID video that attempts to advocate attending the MORmON temple !!!!!!!!!!!!!

I think tscc knows the effect on people when something is a mysterious secret and that secrecy has a lot to do with a member's desire to experience the temple ceremony. Curiosity is a strong force in human nature. The secrecy is hype. Don't fall for it.

I admit that I really thought the temple experience would be special because it was so built-up by those who had done it. But my escort warned me (because we were both converts) that it was a little creepy but I shouldn't fear it. So I wasn't afraid. I did the pre-1990 version so I got all the slashing and disemboweling gestures. But since I had been forewarned I found it kind of overkill. It was obvious that the main intent of all that was that we not share our experience. The rest was just sort of confusing because there really isn't much purpose to it all. There is no higher knowledge to be gained. There is what I would call mumbo jumbo or falderal meant to be impressive but it just isn't. You have to get up and down out of your seat to put on items of clothing and it makes no sense. And the clothing looks ridiculous on everyone. The men's hats are the silliest. I even asked people afterwards what the strings hanging off the mens' hats was all about and nobody ever knew. Part of not being allowed to talk about the temple ceremony is because it really is just made-up hooey to impress rather than educate or inform. It is supposed to be symbolic but symbolic of what???? Nobody I asked could ever answer my questions about the details. They just go through the motions and act like they know. I tried for years to glean some sort of deeper meaning from the temple but it didn't work. So, finally, I would go and just sort of meditate through the whole boring, tiresome, lengthy ceremony. I really feel sorry for the temple workers who have to actually go through that jibber jabber multiple times in a day. Multiple times in a year is bad enough.

Please don't worry that you are missing anything. It takes a truly self-deluded TBM to walk out of a temple and feel like he has accomplished anything of worth by doing it. I regret the gasoline I wasted driving even a few blocks to participate in temple nonsense. My time would have been far better spent had I spent time helping at a homeless shelter or volunteering at a nursing home. Temple rituals are a sad commentary on the lengths a cultish religion will go to scam its members out of their time, talents, and money.

We were told that our tiresome rituals were saving people's eternal life who were dead. Yet, if we didn't do it they would be saved anyway. So....... Ugh! It's just so childish and silly. Even the few dollars I spent renting temple clothes could have been better spent if I'd donated them to a food bank or given it to the Salvation Army. Imagine the many LIVING people who go begging for real help while Mormons sit idly in their temples spending millions of dollars, building, furnishing, maintaining, heating, air conditioning, and cleaning their edifices dedicated to helping the dead. It's truly insane.

haul ass to the temple -to save dead people!!!

.....because dead people are desperately waiting, you know

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XsakhmRzow8

Mormon god works in mysterious ways...

My first time through I thought that when the time came to go to the veil that there would be a real life paranormal portal to another dimension.

When the wall lifted and it was a stupid curtain I felt like Ralphie in A Christmas Story.

Yeah, I was pretty stupid and had no critical thinking skills back then.

I would have expected a portal type thing to the other dimension the way its talked about by some mormons that jesus walks through.

Bamboozled Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> My first time through I thought that when the
> time came to go to the veil that there would be a
> real life paranormal portal to another dimension.

Thank you, for confirming that the MORmONS typically did everything they could to (DECEITFULLY) imply that the temple experience included some sort of of divine manifestation ....when it really did not.


> When the wall lifted and it was a stupid curtain I
> felt like Ralphie in A Christmas Story.


MORmON temple Tee Shirt Slogan: I was lead to believe that I was going to have a spiritual experience and divine manifestation, instead all I got was molested, stupid secret handshakes, and threats on my life to keep me quiet about the crappy deal.

Yes they really did all they could to make it seem like it was actually and literally the house of the lord. A portal into heaven, who wouldnt want to see jesus right?

my proposed tee shirt slogan about the MORmON temple ceremony pretty well sums up my experience and sentiment on the matter of going through the (Hell house) MORmON temple.

just to further clarify, I am NOT very happy about that deal.

When it was my first time through, I really thought that we were going to see Jesus. I didn't feel terrified, but during the movie (in which Satan plays the lead role), he turns and looks at the audience and says that if we don't keep the covenants that we make this day in this temple, we would be in his power. How's that for a scare tactic?! It literally gave me the chills! They tell you before anything begins that if you want to back out, do it now because you'll be making promises before all kinds of witnesses: God, angels, and everyone in the room and that "God will not be mocked". So here we were, our first time through, and we mimicked the different ways that our "lives may be taken" if we revealed anything. Like Boner said, you mimicked slitting your own throat, your chest, and your lower stomach. After you made each motion, you dropped your hands and arms quickly to your sides to look completely like you had killed your self and had dropped dead. Then all the secret handshakes. I thought: God has so many kids, I guess he can't remember who any of us are, so he needs these handshakes to jog his memory! I felt like I was joining the mafia!

Jesus christ i cant believe my parents did this sh#t behind my back the ENTIRE time. But it explains a lot of how leaders act like they are in the mafia with a strong arm.

Hey, badass, you can at least watch the youtube videos without paying tithing.

I went through the temple after the ritual throat slitting. I take it I didn't miss anything. I went through the endowment without being sealed afterward (what? a Mormon who's never been married? Whoda thunk it) and I'm glad it happened that way. Otherwise too much at a time. Do watch the sealing video. Big bunch of BS. Glad I left.

I think i have seen the sealing ritual once but i will see it again i remember it disturbing me. Im sure im not the only one that has to keep re-enforcing things in the mind after leaving to deprogram.

It was so bizarre and of course you're really trying to pay attention on your first time through. What scared me?

I felt unprepared for such an experience. It took me forever to understand what they were whispering through the curtain. I never heard right the first time. It sounded like pig latin straight from a Three's Stooges short. Not hearing words correctly continued to haunt me. On my 2nd visit, I had zero help and failed to even say the first line correctly. That attracted the temple prez who happened to be overseeing the session. He asked me how could I expect to get into the CK if I couldn't remember all the signs and tokens.

On my third attempt, I continued flub it up. We're talking about the "Health in the navel, marrow in the bones..blah blah blah" in case you're wondering. This time I had no family to lean on because I was at the MTC in Provo. When I mixed up the lines, a worker pinched my arm. He actually dug in his fingernail into my arm to physically move me away from the vail. He began to lay into me. "Do you think this is some kind of joke? You're here in the Lord's house and you're mocking sacred events. You should be ashamed of yourself."

I was escorted around the veil and they took back their tiny slip of paper. Apparently, my session was over.

Jesus christ, what the hell was i into without even knowing it. I feel like the church part of the religion is a total facade.

Yes, I feel like that as well. It is a realisation that comes when you start to figure it out.

The church has this huge smoke screen of love and caring and growing and learning and more love and caring. But once you poke through that smoke screen... you see the cold hard (mind)controling machine that is keeping the members busy and the cash rolling towards the corporation that calls itself the church.

Be happy that you are out. :-)

It is so crazy because the facade is so well done if you are just an ignorant kid. Once you get out, the mind starts to think and realize what the hell is really going on.

Exactly!

but it's not just as you say ignorant kids who are fooled. I've known quite a few otherwise intelligent adults who are still not able to see through the deception.

So don't beat yourself up for once believing it. Many still do.
Just be grateful for the clarity of mind that you have now.

and YOU. I went to Brigham City to take something to a family member for his birthday. I live in Hyrum. I drove by the temple and was actually shocked at the grounds as some things have now really grown and it doesn't look so bare. And I thought about the fact that I KNOW what goes on in there.

I HAD TO see it. The videos don't do it justice. I felt a lot of things some of the others have said. I was actually relieved the first time I went through as I had built it up to be really bad. I thought there would be orgies or something. I mean if they won't tell you what is going to happen, then what are they trying to hide?

So I left relieved that first time, but I thought it was weird. I had done my duty and now I was a member of the club. I was 27. All my friends had already married, had a bunch of kids, and for those of us older singles, we KNOW how the mormons treated us. I used to look at my wedding ring all the time thinking, "Finally." So now i was a member of the club.

There was not one time I went through that some old lady didn't bitch at me for something like my sash wasn't tied perfectly. My robe was on inside-out one time at the veil. You'd think I'd committed murder. And for those of us who went through, tell me how you tell if the damn robe is inside out? I know how, but it is almost impossible to tell.

I had a friend tell me that she almost left the church after going through the temple before she left on her mission to Austria. I would assume she is out of the church by now. I found out there was naked touching there and I had to force my sister to tell me about it before I went. I was ready to leave the church over it.

I also thought "this isn't the church I was raised in." It really wasn't. It doesn't belong. If you are following a pattern of learning, the temple just doesn't fit the lds teachings. I also couldn't believe it when they said sexual intercourse. IN THE TEMPLE!!

Then I did sealings to some guy I didn't know. I was pulled aside and my husband was sent on to an endowment. That was bizarre. I never went back after that. That was in 1990. I still have the recommend. I find it funny. I carry it in my wallet.

My ex is still upset at me that I wouldn't go to the temple on bishopric night. He was ex. sec. He had to go alone and all the other wives went. I told my therapist about that and he said, "So you were worthy to go and he wasn't, but he was angry at you?????" (He was cheating with men.)

For some reason that Brigham temple really gets under my skin given I grew up there. The temple was by far the biggest disappointment of my life.

When my daughter was going to get married, I wanted to stand outside with a sign that said, "I CHOOSE not to go in there." If she does ever get married and they told me I could go in there to see her married, I'd tell them no.

It's all pretend. Let's pretend it is special. Let's pretend we understand it. It's hideous. I do know of a couple who worked for years to go through and they left the church after going through.

Why do say YOU when you talk about ME? Haha

temple because I thought about some of the things you've said about the temple on here.

You're missing nothing.

Although even if you watch a video, it is like watching a video of a roller coaster. You really don't know what it is like to ride that roller coaster unless you experience it yourself.

Many people have come here and said something about wondering about what it was like.

I really did have to see it for myself or I would have wondered all my life if I was missing something no matter what someone else said to me or any movies I saw. That's just me. Some people it doesn't matter.

You just happen to be the most recent person who has talked about this. The temple is ridiculous. All this money spent on these buildings to perform these hideous rituals.

My mother went somewhat often to the temple and yet when it was time for me to go through, she asked me to make sure I had someone there to help me as she got too nervous in the temple. She never felt comfortable. When my father realized I was never going back, he told me that when they got married in SLC, it took all day (back in 1952) and that it was BIZARRE. He never went back until my sister got married 25 years later. Many mormons who have been to the temple DON'T GO. If it was that wonderful, they'd be going.

I was the same way as you i had to do it for myself but the price was too high literally so i backed off and i couldnt even answer the questions honestly about 15 guys being prophets i just kind of chuckled in my head at that question, but i could see the control tactics as you get deeper and deeper into the cult as you pledge your soul to fifteen old guys and not a god. But i did want to find out once and for all if it was legit and get all my crazy family off of my back as the reject scapegoat in the family and finally be part of the club. In the end i didnt want their life there has to be something more than secret handshakes.

More than anyone in my family, I wanted that life. But in reality I wanted my family with me forever and I lived in fear of damnation and all that shit.

Then I ran into GAY. And they put me through hell. Then my ex put me through hell. And when I finally had time to think through my experiences, it all fell apart.

Most of my family is out, except my daughter is back in it. I think I've told you this before. She and I have had a lot of issues over this. Most of my siblings are out. My daughter is the only grandchild/great grandchild who is mormon. I have some siblings who still don't believe I left as I was so devout. Mormonism wasn't kind to me. I have a good support group of exmormons in my life like my therapist is an exmormon, my ex, my son, my family, etc. Many of my cousins on my dad's side are out. My mother's side is sickeningly mormon. My grandmother was not. My grandfather died when I was 3, so I don't know. So I have a lot of support.

You aren't the problem. THEY ARE. My life is MUCH, MUCH BETTER since I left than it was while I was following along doing what they told me to do. I used to be the example that everone would say, "But you did it all right and look what happened to your life." Now mormons watch and think, "Why is her life going along so well? What did I do wrong?" Mormons watch and wait for bad things to happen to me. My life is much better. I used to live in fear, too, that maybe I was wrong. I never have that feeling anymore. It took a long time.

I had almost that exact conversation with my counselor. What will happen to the family when i get entirely healthy from leaving the church. Their scapegoat will be living for real and they will have nothing to talk about. My cousin who left the church and was seen as the ultimate screw up is now doing better than everybody and i kind of look to her as an example that it can be done. No more putting my name in the creepy temple to pray about.

Wow, I am recently reactivated and preparing to go to the Temple. After this thread and watching the youtube videos it is pretty much exactly what I imagined it would be. Weird, intended to psychologically scar you, and make you obey. Exactley what I expected.

I have to admit, I have used a lot of LSD in my life and don't believe anything anyone tells me, ever. Logical thought is the only way to live.

So tell me: How do I know you all aren't just members trying to spread a false idea of what happens in temples? What really goes on? I feel like there is some huge thing missing from this thread...

And cl2, please explain what you meant by saying "I also
> couldn't believe it when they said sexual
> intercourse. IN THE TEMPLE!! " and ""So you
> were worthy to go and he wasn't, but he was angry
> at you?????" (He was cheating with men.) "

Thanks for everyone's perspective and information... it is tough to believe this isn't just a cover for what is really going down in THOTL.
>

They say something about "I will not have sexual intercourse with anyone who I am not legally or lawfully wedded to, now bow your head and say yes."

Something like that. Some of the people who went to the temple often know it better than I do.

For the other, my ex was cheating on me (he's gay, I've been on the board a long time so people usually know my ex is gay). Anyway, he was the executive secretary and he lied to get his TR. I wouldn't allow him to "repent" again. We went through that in the singles ward and I was NEVER going to talk to leaders about this again. They always made it my problem. I had to save him. It really was placed on my head. It still is. I had told him that he was to wait until he was released from being executive secretary and then we were going inactive.

So when they had bishopric nights, he felt he had to go. I refused to go. He lied to get a TR. I didn't have one and yet I was worthy to get one. I wouldn't go back after doing the sealings. When you do the baptisms and endowments and sealings for the dead, you are doing them proxy. You are imitating your own wedding basically. Some people may be able to not let that bother them. IT BOTHERED ME. It was just more than I could take. I sat in the foyer for about 40 minutes waiting for my husband to get out of the endowment session and I had enough time to "meditate" about the whole experience. I never went back. I went about 4 to 5 times to the temple. I always planned on being the perfect little temple attendee. My ex had to guilt me into going every time I did.



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 09/05/2017 06:21PM by cl2.

When you go through i want to know your experience bettervibes.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 09/05/2017 06:47PM by badassadam.

And p.s. i thought orgies happened also or baby sacrifices or some crazy sh#t.

Same! what's up with the mormon housewife orgy?

Dont ask me

I went through the temple in 1982 so I took the death oaths. I thought it was weird but my parents were right there with me. Satan freaked me out when he shouted "They will be in my power!" I had been told that it would take a while to fully understand so I kept going. I now fully understand that the endowment was created to maintain the secrecy of plural marriage. It has evolved into the perfect trap to guarantee that the faithful pay their tithing, thus insuring a steady cash flow for the top 15.

I see, thank you i never heard the secrecy of plural marriage but it makes sense.

One thing I find ironic is how Mormons can talk about the Catholic Church being real ritualistic; with what goes on in the temple.

It's something else