Posted by:
Mother Who Knows
(
)
Date: October 21, 2017 12:33AM
I had some weight creep up on me slowly, following my divorce, and resulting from the pressure, and the fear of being the sole source of financial and emotional support for my children. Working and keeping house exhausted me, and I was getting older....
There are many reasons we gain weight, and you need to figure out your own reasons. Take need care of the psychological stuff. This can be fun! I realized that I wasn't allowing myself enough time for sleep, and zero time for fun. Somehow, in my nightmare life, I had to start treating myself better, instead of beating myself up, and forcing myself to work harder. The best thing I did was quit the cult--and that gave me my weekends back, to have fun with the kids, and sleep in. 10% more money made a huge difference to us.
As for healthy foods and portion control, and all of that, use a website, like the one suggested, or "Calorie King"--they are all good. I like science, so I liked the calorie approach. I had never had to diet before, and I knew diets would probably not work well on me. Instead, I computed exactly how many calories a female of my height and bone structure would need to maintain a weight 25 pounds less than my present weight. I ate to maintain my "ideal weight", until my body adapted--by losing weight until it reached that goal weight. It took 9 months, but I was aiming for one year. I was not hungry, because I was eating a reasonable number of calories, and I was eating only healthy food that my body really could use.
With me, most of the extra calories were sugar, butter, fats, and junk food. Though junk like that is high in calories, it made me hungrier, and gave me the "shakes". Remove the garbage and chemically processed foods, and you will be amazed at how small your amounts of REAL food have been, every day. These days, you can find healthy substitutes for almost anything.
The calorie-counting programs also keep you from eating too little. Often, I was too busy to fix myself a real meal with real food, or I would skip one or two meals--and then my body would crave food with a vengeance! Don't ever try a starvation or "fad" diet, because after you stop starving yourself, the weight comes back, plus more extra pounds.
Eat to maintain your reasonable goal weight.
Exercise helps with weight loss. It helps with motivation, for example, when you exercise in the morning, for the rest of the day you think, "I did something healthy this morning, and I'm not going to erase the good work with doing something unhealthy. Being overweight is unhealthy. I never thought about how I looked or how my clothes fit--I just wanted to be healthy, and able to do the things I liked to do.
I hated exercise. I hated the atmosphere of a gym--literally--it smelled bad, the music hurt my ears, it was a long drive to get there, and took up too much time. I love being outdoors, in all weather, so I decided to exercise outdoors. I had the greatest dog in the world, and she urged me to walk her every day, after work. My main motivation for walking was that it kept me sane, and happy. The endorphins can be addicting. After 3 weeks of wanting to just sit on the couch after work, I was hooked!
You don't have to do anything dramatic, or extreme. In fact, often it is best to not tell anyone you are trying to lose weight. Too many people will sabotage your diet. Former ice-cream buddies, family members, people who were jealous of my success, and party-hosts, all tried to make me eat stuff that wasn't healthy for me. Finally, I just said I was "allergic," to shut them up. To myself, I said, "Junk food makes me break out in fat."
Relax, don't beat yourself up, treat yourself in other ways that don't involve food, be moderate and reasonable, put in the time, and do the math, and trust the math.
Oh, with all those websites and apps, you really need to write down everything you eat. For me, this kept me from constantly having to think about food, and remember what I ate last, and compute how many calories I had left, etc. Write it down and forget it.
Let us know how you are doing--no, don't say anything at all--just do it, and have it be your secret.