Since the rules state that people are not allowed to be raptured with their clothing, I shall be looking for a banana next to a pile of clothing.
==============================================================


"Biblical prophecy predicts the Rapture is April 23: Christians look forward to the end of the world, when they will rise in the sky and meet Jesus.

Fox News reports the end of the world is April 23, according to prominent Christian numerologist David Meade:

For a certain branch of evangelical Christianity, Revelation 12:1–2 describes the beginning of what is known as the Rapture and the second coming of Christ.

The passage reads: “And a great sign appeared in heaven: a woman clothed with the sun, with the moon under her feet, and on her head a crown of 12 stars. She was pregnant and was crying out in birth pains and the agony of giving birth.”

In the passage, the woman is represented as Virgo.

According to Meade, the alignment represents “the Lion of the tribe of Judah,” marking the Rapture, the belief that Christ will bring the faithful into paradise prior to a period of tribulation on earth that precedes the end of time.

“Christian numerologist” Meade told the U.K.’s Daily Express:

During this time frame, on April 23, 2018 the moon appears under the feet of the Constellation Virgo.

The Sun appears to precisely clothe Virgo… Jupiter is birthed on April 08, 2018.

The 12 stars at that date include the nine stars of Leo, and the three planetary alignments of Mercury, Venus and Mars – which combine to make a count of 12 stars on the head of Virgo.

Thus the constellations Virgo, Leo and Serpens-Ophiuchus represent a unique once-in-a-century sign exactly as depicted in the 12th chapter of Revelation. This is our time marker.

According to the “Christian numerologist” Planet X, also known as Nibiru, will appear above the sky on the April 23, causing volcanic eruptions, tsunamis and earthquakes.
However, NASA has repeatedly pointed out that Planet X, also known as Nibiru, is a hoax. Commenting on the Rapture story, Space.com reports:

What planet is responsible for this alignment? It’s Nibiru, a mythical world supposedly orbiting the sun in an extremely long, eccentric orbit that has been debunked again and again by NASA — but it somehow keeps popping up in forecasts of doom. In the latest prediction, Nibiru is supposed to pass by Earth this October, causing volcanic eruptions as the gravity of this massive world disturbs our own.

Nibiru has been implicated in all sorts of planetary trouble, going back as far as 1995, when there were nasty predictions that it would collide with Earth. NASA, however, reassured us a few years ago that “No giant, rogue planet has been found in the outer solar system to play the role of Nibiru.”

Oh good. Spring cleaning.

Um...that was three weeks ago.
No rupture...err...rapture.

Should I be surprised? :)

You won't find any bananas or piles of clothing.
The rapture-obsessed are busy coming up with a new date to fail at.

Maybe not, he didn't specify a year......Sorry I missed that he did. Should not be reading between running jobs at work



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/17/2018 12:25PM by sbg.

"During this time frame, on April 23, 2018 the moon appears under the feet of the Constellation Virgo.
The Sun appears to precisely clothe Virgo… Jupiter is birthed on April 08, 2018."

Yeah, he did :)

I ruptured a muscle right about then....must be true!!

"Since the rules state that people are not allowed to be raptured with their clothing, I shall be looking for a banana next to a pile of clothing."

Banana? Wait does that mean people will go up only wearing a banana hammock. If that is the case then meeting all my dead ancestors is going to be awkward.

The doctrine of the rapture is fairly recent. It can be traced back to the Plymouth Brethren in the UK. The Brethren themselves were split on the issue. Its fascinating that the notion of dispensationalism also can be traced back to them.

The notion of dispensationalism shows up in Mormonism as we are in “The Dispensation of the Fulness of Time.”

As with the rapture, Dispensationalism is not a doctrine of the majority of Christians—Catholic, Anglican, Mainline Protestant, or Orthodox.

The LDS view of “the tribulations and rapture” is best summarized in D&C Section 45.

As others have pointed out, part of Horny Joe’s brilliance was to weave contempory 19th Century American religious concerns into Mormonism—everything from debates about infant baptism to Dispensationalism, to “secret combinations.”



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/17/2018 12:40PM by BYU Boner.

...plus, he was ahead of his time with his own unique Nauvoo variation of "Planned Parenthood."

"Doctor John C.Bennett...Serving the Nauvoo area since 1840. Call 1-800-COATHANGER for appointment."

NOW you tell us.

in b 4 ~ April 23 ~



















wait ~

wut ? ~

Best not renew my TV license then :)

If the "righteous" go naked into the rapture does that mean Mormons will be leaving their magic underwear behind?
The thought makes reason stare.

These raptures would be much more popular if Jesus scheduled them before tax day.

I have a theory that The Rapture already happened and nobody was
righteous enough except Jimmy Hoffa.

Dammit I forgot to be dead. CRS!

If this is the Rapture, nuthin from nuthin leaves nuthin.

As if Global warming isn't bad enough.

Wake me when it's over.....again!

I especially get a kick out of Shinehah's comment!

How appropriate. Perhaps I'll have my English flag of St. George at the ready together with a volume of Shakespeare.

Didn't you all notice it!!!!!
It clearly only applied by a very small area, like maybe one acre of the world.....

Oh, I see.

So it's like the JW "second coming" then.
It happened, but nobody noticed.
Got it.

:)

I'm old enough to remember when that radio preacher Harold Camping predicted the end of the world for May 21, 2011. He had billboards put up all over the world months in advance. There was a huge brouhaha, he even gave a final radio broadcast the night before. Then ... nada