I did. I didn’t get it, but I needed it. Maybe I could have used part of my tithing refund, but I didn’t get that either.

Ditto.

I did need it. Psychotherapy was something totally unfamiliar to me, and I think that I was initially very uncomfortable talking about these issues with anyone.

I think it would have helped me create less collateral damage in my life because of the experience. And maybe would have helped me deal with the obsession. I would be thinking about this subject all the time.

In addition, I think the experience made me feel like I was smarter than I actually was. I was like--wow! All these really bright people haven't figured this out and look at me. Yes. That's true, but a lot of bright people don't buy it either, and there are other things that I don't know or understand.

Heck, I needed therapy *before* my shelf broke. It was my therapist who pointed out to me how dysfunctional my religion was! And *that* *was* therapeutic!

My therapy consisted of coffee, talking with known apostates, and learning to say fuck (a lot). RfM didn’t then exist, but now, it’s been wonderful for establishing community and laugh at the Morg. The therapeutic Boner.

My therapy has been RfM and the forbidden internet. Reading recommended books by the Tanners, Fawn Brodie, and some others really helped me. I was lucky enough to have family that left the same time as me to vent with.

When my shelf broke, it was like this huge burden had been lifted from my shoulders.

Same here. I was mentally and emotionally healthier than I had been in many years.

Same here.

I was watching young men on TV who’d been raped by Warren Jeffs. I went to my desk, wrote out my resignation and drove it to the post office. I was cured. No therapy needed.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 07/07/2018 01:28AM by kathleen.

For me it was like escaping from prison. It was a relief, but there are still people trapped inside and the structure itself still standing. You can’t exactly march around it seven times and blow a few trumpets.

This is what happened to me. I felt completely free.

My wife and I went to a marriage counselor. The problem was she insisted on a Mormon counselor. Needless to say it didn't end well. The counselor obviously took my wife's side and in so many words suggested that she leave me. Not very professional.

Felix Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> My wife and I went to a marriage counselor. The
> problem was she insisted on a Mormon counselor.
> Needless to say it didn't end well. The counselor
> obviously took my wife's side and in so many words
> suggested that she leave me. Not very
> professional.

A Mormon counselor is the first counselor I saw. I told him straight up my highest goal was not to go to the temple. He just scuffed me off and said, "You want to go to the temple". Yea that didn't end well at all and I ended up hospitalized without even figuring out what the neck was wrong with me.

Am I unblocked? Alright I got to be better I was way out of line last time and I realize that, but I do think I need this board to vent my mind or some other board to vent at least. Need to get better at handling provokers. I do think I can help the board eventually when I am a little more settled in the real world.

I needed it and I got it (not just for my exit from Mormonism). The church paid for my therapy (because my 'then' wife demanded that I go to therapy for my apostasy) and my therapist was a member of the stake high council.

But my story is one of those rare good ones.

First thing my therapist said to me after I word vomited all over him about what was pent up inside was:

"People change religion all the time. It's ok and it's not bad."

For the first time in my life, I could actually relax and unpack all of the mess that I was and start crafting a plan to move towards authenticity.

One of the best things I ever did.

I needed PHYSICAL therapy. Couldn't get the smile off of my face.

Hahahah!

I was already in therapy for PTSD. The therapist helped me understand my childhood abuse, and psychopaths in general. He helped me to understand that the family I grew up in had been extremely dysfunctional, and far from normal. He helped me deal with present abuse, and I finally made the abuse stop. (The only thing that worked was "no contact" with the psychopaths who beat and tortured me.)

All this happened, without my psychiatrist mentioning TSCC at all, though we touched on dysfunctional traits, such as male supremacy, sexism, racism, authoritarianism, perfectionism, bullying, lying, manipulation, physical abuse, pedophilia, psychopathology and Cluster B personalities, bi-polar personalities, rage, guilt, blame, and abusers getting away with their criminal acts. As you can see, there were a lot of issues I had to deal with, without mentioning the probable source of most of this craziness.

Therapy helped give me the courage to divorce my wife-beater husband, and to sue two family members who stole money from me and my siblings. Sometimes, action needs to be taken.

As I learned more about the environment in which I was raised, I gained insight into the Mormon cult. My therapist never told me to leave, but I knew I had to, if I wanted to reach my potential of happiness and success. More important, I needed to rescue my children from the cult!

Therapy helped open my mind, and jolt me out of denial, and see past the Mormon facade of "benign friendliness."

My psychiatrist was a cognitive therapist, and he helped me fill my mind with Truth and beauty, REAL history, biographies, science, music, appreciation of other cultures. I had to learn to be positive, and see the goodness in much of what the Mormons had taught me were "bad." Conversely, I learned to see the bad in what I had been brainwashed into thinking was "good."

I was ready! When my shelf broke, I was strong, happy, had a close loving relationship with my children, and had a successful career. Discovering the Truth brought me great joy, and relief, like other posters have described. My children were ready, and we resigned together.

Had we not been strong, we would have probably needed more therapy, to bear the shunning, the insults, the gossip, the defamation of character. Still, it was not as bad as the bullying and disrespect we experienced when we were members! Shunning was unexpected, and painful at first, but it soon reinforced our decision to flush Mormonism out of our life. I run into those mormon neighbors, still, and they turn away, and I feel light as air. Mormonism, and the Mormons, and their secrets and lies and weirdness and demands had been a huge burden. For us, the shunning became a plus!

Luckily, our jobs never depended on Mormons, and we had a lot of non-Mormon friends and contacts. I had already distanced us from the abusive TBM family members. We had already laid a good foundation for the rest of our lives. That was 15 years ago.

I highly recommend therapy, at any stage in the process of leaving Mormonism. There's a lot of damage to undo, and it can be undone!

I had changed my mind about a lot of things in my life, I certainly did not need therapy to do it again when I was in my late 50's. As a convert, married in the temple to a believer, I knew I was the best qualified to manage the changes I was making. I had to learn how to do it myself. I found support on this board, and other places, but ultimately, it was my responsibility to figure it out. I knew that adding another person's input, who was uninformed about leaving Mormonism, as in therapy, would only complicate my process. I did not want my husband or family to conclude I was being influenced by an outsider. Besides, they knew I was a very strong, woman who knew her own mind and were very supportive. In addition,I was very clear about why I could no longer accept or believe the claims of the Mormon Church. My husband suggested we "agree to disagree" and that worked beautifully. As long as I didn't bother him about Mormonism, he didn't bother me about it either. I could share fun, funny experiences which was part of our partnership bond, anyhow. I got through the rough spots by trial and error and learned a lot about myself, other people, my husband, and my family. I'm not one to use therapy for myself, anyhow. I have never trusted anyone to know me better than I know myself. The small forays into therapy had been disastrous in the past and I was not going to do that again!

To answer the OP I definitely needed therapy and still get therapy. I needed therapy when I was way younger but I never got it so I just dealt with things the wrong way to bury the pain. My pain meds covered all my pain for a long time and I thought I was good, but I wasn't. I never dealt with the issues and just covered them up.

Many might likely say I needed it. Who knows?

No therapy for leaving that crappy church. It was a big relief. And it was a total relief when I moved without telling anybody. :^)

I am a therapist, I still need therapy. I can sometimes walk on my own, and often backslide. I have a bad eating disorder. An addiction to cope, but still make it through life without getting arrested. It is the slowest form of self-harm. So yeah. I still need therapy.

Therapy??? No. I'm a big girl, all grown up and I can handle

problems that come along in life, however it was very cathartic

to come to RFM . It helped me in numerous ways mainly because at

that time people who were here were very serious about recovery

whereas now, they are just very serious about other things, like

themselves and their problems and how much of a victim they are.

But I digress. RFM is the best place to be when you first

discover the church is a giant lie, and you've been taken for

the ride of your life holding on to a fake belief system about

a church based on lies and a man (Prophet) and his lust for

women, sex and money.

we don't recover in a vaccum , we do it with each other's love

support and understanding. When it works its a beautiful thing.

Sometimes a big person admits they need counseling. I went a long time thinking I was just fine when I wasn't.

Or if it was court odered, as I'm sure it was.