Posted by:
exminion
(
)
Date: September 08, 2018 02:31AM
Oh, yes.
It must be difficult being in Utah, and having to deal with your grief, and all the Mormons. If you can, you need to drive up into the mountains, or to Liberty Park, or somewhere, to reconnect with your own sanity.
Your SIL might be negligent, or sloppy, or maybe too upset to think clearly. This sounds harsh, but RFM helped me deal with the Mormons in my family, by helping me to realize that most of them are "batshit crazy". After you've been out of the cult for a while, you realize that most rational people don't think or act like Mormons, at all. Most people have RESPECT for each other, as human beings. It matters where a person is born, and how many children they had, and where they lived and worked, and other details. Most Mormon obituaries are lists. Lists accounting for all their years at various church callings, lists of surviving family members (I'm sure your SIL's name was correct) and whether they went on a mission or to BYU. Often, a person's occupation and places of employment are omitted.
Anyway, Utahns and Mormons are what they are, and just relax and accept that. Kathleen has good advice. Just plow through, then head for home.
You might feel better, by using this as a cautionary tale, and writing your OWN obituary, when you get home. That's the only way to make sure everything is correct. I also made specific instructions about what kind of funeral I want (no funeral, just a graveside service, and a wake with just the family, and no Mormon sermons or prayers, etc, and I also have pre-paid everything).
You can look on the bright side. My brother's family were too cheap to have an obituary. No obituary at all, anywhere, except e-mailed (for free) to certain Mormon friends and relatives. A lot of relatives, even, didn't even know my brother had died, and I had to tell them, myself, and see their shock, and hurt that they had missed his funeral, which was agonizing. I had trusted his family, when they said they were "taking care of everything." If you have another sibling, you could offer to take care of the obituary, yourself.