I know that I'm a basket case, but I still have my church dance card. I am going to list what it says.
(Somewhere), California Stake Church name in italics
Name: Messy Goop Ward/Branch_______
I have explained LDS conduct and dress standards
_________ Bishop's Signature
I will abide by LDS conduct and dress standards
___________ (My signature~ Messy)
Dance Time 8:30 - 11:00 pm Expires ____ (2/90) Non Transferable
*This card is required for admission to all dances. If you bring guests who are not familiar with LDS standards of dress and conduct, it is your responsibility to inform them of such and thus avoid any chance of embarrassing them. (fine print)
Back of dance card (AKA nitty-gritty)
Conduct
1. All young people who attend are expected to sign in at the door and remain in the hall. Those who leave the building before the dance is over may not be readmitted unless special permission is given by adult chaperones. Sign-out required before 10:30 pm.
2. When you leave, be thoughtful of neighbors and avoid all unnessary (sic) noise. This will eliminate any embarrassment from complaints of neighbors.
3. The use of tobacco, drugs or alcoholic beverages anywhere on church property is prohibited.
4. No bear-hugging or dancing in any suggestive manner.
L.D.S. Dress Standards
Regular Dances
YM: Appropriate dress shirts with ties. Well pressed slacks- no levis or jeans.
YW: Modest dresses or separates with appropriate hems (no mini skirts) No bare midriff, bare shoulders or off-the-shoulder tops
Semi-Formal
YM: Dress shirt and tie with jacket or suit (may wear appropriate sweater or vest). Dress Slacks
YW: Long or short dressy dress- modest hemline, no strapless, bare midriffs or halter tops.
I never invited any non-member friends to the church dances. I attended my public schools' ones and those were lame to begin with. The last thing I wanted to do was to invite them to "Leave it to Beaver" land for a church dance.
I know that any guest that was invited had to be interviewed by a member of the bishopric. I don't know what type of questioning was asked.
I remember seeing a non-member friend that was invited by another seminary girl. I couldn't get over how the seminary girl had made-over my school friend into a wallflower. It really got her head spinning because she also came to church the following day. Then the rest of the week, she only talked about how exciting the Mormon church was in school. It embarrassed me at the time.
messygoop Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > I know that any guest that was invited had to be > interviewed by a member of the bishopric. I don't > know what type of questioning was asked.
I had a non-member (catholic!) girlfriend for a while in HS. I invited her to a stake dance. Let her know about the dress code, etc.
When we arrived, since she had no dance card, the official bishopbric representative (2nd counselor in a ward I wasn't in) interviewed her. Standing in the foyer with me right next to her. He asked if she knew the standards with regard to "moral behavior." He seriously told her that while she might be used to sexually-suggestive dancing, none of that would be allowed here. I could see her stifling a giggle. She agreed to everything. I vouched for her outstanding morality. He let her in.
After the dance, when we were making out in my car (!), she told me it felt like she'd moved back to 1950 as he was talking to her. I agreed they were quite backwards and rather silly. What's funny is that she was actually more "moral" than most of the mormon girls I dated...:)
when I had the most perverted bishop of the ones I had to deal with, he always asked the questions about masturbation and necking and petting for the dance cards, too, and we had to get them every quarter.
Oddly enough, the next bishop (I was out of high school) never once asked about masturbation or necking or petting. The only other time masturbation was talked about in my time in mormonism was when the bishop would talk to me about my gay boyfriend/husband and about keeping track of his masturbation habits so we could make him straight.
Grew up in the Church (on the east coast). Went to dances all through my dancing years (high school, college years, etc.) and never once even heard of a dance interview. Our region/stake/ward must never have gotten the memo on that.
Well, some of the Mormon singles dance attendees needed a special permit. The felons bussed in from the point-of-the-mountain needed a special pass issued by the prison.
"Have you robbed, raped, beaten, or molested anyone lately?"
"Well, no... I've been in jail."
Sorry. I have a bad attitude from bad experiences, during my calling in the mormon singles.
A few years ago a poster said that he took Renee Zellweger to a church dance when they were both teenagers and they would not let her stay unless she covered up with a sweater.
In the book "Catch 22" there is, at a certain army camp, a loyalty-oath crusade. People are asked to sign loyalty oaths. It goes crazy with people needing to sign loyalty oaths before they can get served in the mess hall. Then it spirals out of control until finally separate loyalty oaths are required to get your main dish, your side dish, your drink, etc.
Mormonism is like that with "worthiness interviews."
I had a big sound system and used to do dances for some side profit. I always made sure I played Salt and Peppa's "Push It" at church dances. Never had anyone run up and say, "stop playing that filth!" I also played the Jo Boxer "Just Got Lucky". Haha! Oh come on. The priesthood are viewing porn and hid the sausage is being played in the church. Is this the leaderships business? I can see not promoting such behavior and making council available if someone wants to confess something they have a problem with. But interrogating people like you are Sergeant Friday isn't cool.
I was a teen in the Washington DC suburbs in the mid-to-late '60s. When our stake center was completed, local leaders flooded the surrounding neighborhoods with flyers inviting everyone to our open house. It was supposed to be a missionary opportunity. A meet the Mormons kind of thing.
What our inspired priesthood leaders didn't know was "open house" had a different meaning in local non-Mormon youth culture. Among the "gentile" teens, an open house was a dance party open to the general public.
So the saints were gathered in the gym, quietly, piously, seriously consuming punch and cookies and nervously re-stacking Books of Mormon and tracts, when bewildered teens started showing up. "Where's the open house?" I took it upon myself to explain to them what was going on. And to apologize.
I forgot my dance card once as a youth. So before I was allowed to go into the dance I had to get "interviewed" by some random guy I never met.
He told me I couldnt smoke or curse. It wasn't much beyond that. I told him I was mormon my whole life and never smoked anyway but for some reason he really reiterated the no smoking thing to me.
I saw another young guy being given a tie to wear. He came without one and so they had given him one of the back ups.
Maybe we were just too small town to have dance interviews, but I do not remember being interviewed, or anyone in my “church group of friends” talking about it. That would have been in the late 60’s early 70’s. I remember we were suppose to be 16 but I was 15 when I started attending church dances. I do remember getting challenged with the music we wanted to have at our church dance and one of the Elders literally having a fit because he considered what we were listening to evil. I never went again after his “fit.” It was pretty ugly, he really got intense. Years later a friend of mine, who also left the LDS church confided in me that this particular “Elder” had sexually abused her. I was sickened when she told me. This man’s daughter is alive and was our age, I know her to this day. That’s how my friend was abused, she went over to their house and….. anyway that’s when it happened. We both quit going to church after his man came into our lives. I did resign from the church when I was 20. I am now 64.
'Interview-we': First of all, WE don't do (accept or acknowledge) interviews. And, to answer your question - it's none of your business [or pleasure] - YES!
The question is, can they/ YOU?
What difference does it make? Some, until you are barefoot.