Its hard for me to get emotional. But ever since finding these forums a few days ago, I have gotten emotional so many times at the support and love that is here. I am so glad to have found all of this! All of us are still these complex personalities, yet we have much in common. I was always told reasons why people left the church, but I was never told that people leave because they've realized its all a huge facade. They never say that at General Conference. And it bugs me when TBM's say "they were just offended so they left" as if the person never had a legitimate reason to be offended or bitter. Most HAVE EVERY reason to be bitter towards something that lied to them, stole family away, took money, time, energy, etc.

You all are great and I really am enjoying reading the posts every day. Like I said it gets me emotional, maybe because I've finally found people I can truly relate with. Thank you!

Thank you for showing why such forums are needed. My still-Mormon friends say to me, "Why can't you just walk away? Why do you have to be on forums like this where you all just sit around figuring out ways to bring down the Church?"

Bring down the Church. Right. The idea of needing a forum, where people who understand where you've been, where you are now and where you're trying to go - the need for an actual recovery from Mormonism - is a totally alien concept to them.

They'll never get it.

Same here, Greyfort. It's people like Whoa that we think of when people ask why we can't "put it behind us."

Aside from all the joking, sharing the truth about Mormonism saves families and saves lives.

I could volunteer to man the suicide line, but I have nothing of any special assistance for that. But I certainly can describe how Mormonism HURT MY CHILDREN.

Even TBM's want to hear that--they can't imagine such a fine, well-organized church could possibly hurt wee ones...they do a lot of good in the world, don't they?

Maybe, but they devastated MY world and that's what I have to live with. Just passing the word--save yourselves before it's too late.


Anagrammy

You are welcome.

I remember finding this place two weeks ago or 3!

I was in dire straits.

I felt like I was loosing my mind.

It is nice to finally be understood.

I am not nuts, I am not wierd and I don't have to be white and delightsome.

These folks rock!

Let us know how we can help!

Dear AIC
What a lovely breath of humor and sweetness you have brought to this board on your own journey ! I love your presence here and wish you luck with all your own dealings. I can't wait each night to read your posts. Humor indeed is a good medicine and thanks for helping raise our spirits ....

Thank us when we are clearly evil and Satanic???

We will lead you unto destruction and then laugh at your melted face.

Until then, whatever you need, you've got. We are here to help.


Before the face melting part and the Satan rodeo dealy.

Well I think we've answered the age old question: What do gays, hicks, and Satan have in common...

Yes, this is a great place. It gives everyone hope in the ways they need it. I need it to help me realize one day my daughter may actually discover that Mormonism is a fraud...just like many here have done. People here give me hope nearly every day. Best to you as you continue to read- sometimes laugh, and always gain strength.

Stick around, as long as you like. RFM is a world unto itself.

S

What a lovely post. It reminds me of the feelings of finding RfM and realizing that there were other exmos roaming the world and I was no longer alone. It's comforting to know that.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 06/16/2011 07:52AM by Cheryl.

Nice post. I am also very thankful for the people who post here, I have learned a lot and it litterally saved my life. Thanks also.

to be fixed -- and not by Mormonism.

It's difficult changing your whole paradigm and World View.
But people do it all the time.
Thanks to the Internet we can share our experiences and find out how other people do it.

Maybe there is an once of truth to taking offense --- maybe somethings are offense to our common sense.:-)
For instance: spiritual eye claims do not mean there were any real physical golden plates to translate into the Book of Mormon which is about imaginary people, places and things.
There are no Lamanites and Nephites or any of the rest of it.
Very clever story, however, clearly plagiarized from other works.

The fact that there are members that believe it shows the power of the emotional attachment/bond to the God Myth.

We all have the right to change our mind! I sure did!

Welcome aboard. Hang in there. You'll find what works for you in your process out of Mormonism. You are your own authority!

The 'Why we left' stories was a huge help to me when I was having doubts about the church. I know exactly how you feel. The problem isn't in us, it's in the church.

It's not true and we no longer have to twist our brains trying to make sense of it.

The stupid church says thing like this: "Sexual sin is next to MURDER in seriousness"...Then it never defines what sexual sin amounts to. So, young impressionable kids, who are just now discovering their natural sexuality, are left to hate themselves needlessly!

Anyone here remember that feeling? I do.

That's why we need to speak out. We need to let others realize that it's the CHURCH that's the problem -- not THEM. The earlier they can realize this, the healthier they will be in the long run.



(Bye the way, "You're welcome")

Yes. In all seriousness, THIS FORUM kept me from crawling back to the Mormon Church when we moved here last summer. The social factor, however underhanded it is, IS very appealing.

Being military and moving so much really, really sucks sometimes. Especially with a pack of young kids in tow. Plus being overseas AGAIN where none of the appliances work right and you can't pound a nail into the wall (without the wall cracking) makes one feel profoundly sorry for onesself. Now, we're not starving in a village in Africa and my husband's not deployed (yet) so we do have some perspective on suffering, but still.

Being able to carve out one hour for myself after the kids have gone to bed, or even while they are playing with their erector set on the living room rug, is just pure luxury for me. To read, laugh and cry has been so healing.

Plus, you guys are here no matter where the military, in its infinite wisdom, decides to send us next.

......And you can get some darn good green bean recipes out of the deal
......And I've begun to see that gay people SHOULD have the same rights I have, wow
......And I've actually thought that sex maybe should be more fun, and maybe more often than every few months
......And that it's Ok to be MAD/ANGRY/OUTRAGED at the Mormon Church but that I'll be Ok once the feelings subside
......And that I did the right thing by extricating our kids out of the Mormon indoctrination camp
......And that laughter is really a good medicine
......And it'd be Ok if I think about going to Victoria Secret some day (still blush just thinking about it) and trash my granny-panties
......And maybe think about looking at a tank top. My shoulders have NEVER seen the light of day.

Just some thoughts. Thank you guys.

I'm a nevermo and a military wife who has moved four times (once overseas) in the last four years. I totally get how much it sucks to move so often and I feel your pain. Our last move was in April and there might be yet another move next year as my husband closes out his career.

I hang out on this board because my husband is an exmo and his kids have disowned him. There are some seriously funny, creative, and talented people who hang out on this forum. Mormons have a reputation for being really good people and I've found that to be true of exMormons, too. I only hope some of the better people in the church have influenced my husband's daughters and they someday realize what they've done in throwing away their awesome dad. On the other hand, I hope they don't decide to try to lovebomb him back into the church.

I loved living overseas and was very sad when we had to come back to the States early. I'm hoping we can go back abroad once my husband retires. But next time we move abroad, I want to stay longer than two years!

You're right about the social factor in the church. When we moved to Okinawa in 2005, we had wonderful LDS friends almost immediately, and they turned out to be real friends! That was the only place I've been where it really was a ward family. Of course I met some awesome non members too. I can't wait to go back overseas.

If you don't mind me asking, where have you both been to overseas?

I'm going to use my next military move to go inactive.

Funny story when I was in Okinawa, I was ultra TBM, and I was preparing some church materials for a lesson. A google search brought up this place and I read a little of what everyone was saying. It scared me away and I couldn't believe all the church history lies were being spread. Everyone on here was satanic, IMO. Of course now I see that everyone here is really supportive and for some of us it's the only place we can vent, since we have to keep our mouths shut at home. Now...looking back I think this is what planted the seed of doubt. It's nice to see other military spouses, good luck on your journey!

I have lived overseas three times:

Once in England as an Air Force brat... my first memories in life are of England, because I was a little kid when we moved there. I went to an English kindergarten.

Once in Armenia as a Peace Corps Volunteer...

And once in Stuttgart, Germany, as an Army wife. We were in Germany from 2007-2009. My husband got reassigned a year early, thanks to some meddling by a guy who put him through hell in Iraq. The new job was supposed to be a step up, and I guess it ultimately was, but it was such a pain to have to move back to America. Besides, we really loved Germany and got to do so much traveling. My husband's job was interesting and kind of in line with what he studied in college (international relations).

From Germany, we went to Fort McPherson, which is closing in September of this year, so we had to move to Fort Bragg just 18 months after coming back to America. My husband has three years left and the job he's in should be ending next year, so there is a good chance we'll have to move one last time. I'm from Virginia and grew up there after my dad retired from the Air Force. When my husband and I first got married, we were stuck in Virginia for years (6 for him, 5 for me). I used to joke that I couldn't escape Virginia. I guess that curse has been broken.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 06/17/2011 09:07AM by knotheadusc.

My very best friend (nevermo) is stationed at Fort Bragg. I met her in Okinawa. She loves Fort Bragg.

Another friend (also nevermo) just moved to Germany. Her pictures are amazing! If we can't go back to Okinawa, we want to go to Germany.

Too bad about being stuck in Virginia. I've heard that happens a lot. Hope you last assignment is a good one!

Thanks for sharing!

Well, so far North Carolina has been nice enough. And we did enjoy living in Georgia and even Virginia, though I think I'd prefer not to have to live near DC again. I just wish the process of moving was less stressful and frequent!

I hope you will get to experience Germany sometime. It truly is a beautiful country.