Anonymous female ex-Mo
Date: February 26, 2019 12:01AM
I come from a Mormon Royalty family with GA's temple presidents, mission presidents, stake presidents, and so on, so I have known a lot of women like this. When you know them, they are individuals, but, collectively, and especially when "on stage" in the cult, they really speak like clones, behave like clones, and look like clones. Sister Bednar (He is "president" but she is only "sister") has it down! She has the perfect little-girl voice, the hang-dog face, the turned-down mouth, the vacant eyes, the slumped-over posture, the figure that is as much like a little boy as she can have it without completely starving to death. I think those little pastel knit suits come only in petite sizes.
Humility? It came across to me as more like self-pity. She's a martyr. Poor little me. She struck me as unappreciative, negative, and, yes, depressed. She didn't mention to the audience (were they translating in Spanish?) about her cleaning service, her kitchen help for parties, her gardener, etc. All of the Mormon high-up wives have lots of household help, so they can have more free time to travel with their husband, go to all those meetings, keep beauty parlor appointments, have a picture-perfect house, entertain and schmooze. I also have friends who are married to CEO's, company-men, doctors and other executive-type men who put their career first. To me, there's no difference between those and the Mormon latter-day ladder-climbers. NO difference. They're doing it for money and power. Like someone else commented, the Bednars' life is NOT a life of "service."
Why does "suffering" make someone a better person? NOT! It makes one bitter and unhappy, and prone to spreading gloom and doom to others. Is Bednar spreading money around (like Bill Gates and others, but on a much smaller scale, but making a difference, and helping others)?
Humility requires gratitude. Those babies she bore--were they worth it? Did she appreciate a roof over her head? Obviously, it took more than the "simple things" to keep the Bednars satisfied.
What about being alone? Hell--I have known a lot of divorced single mothers in the LDS Singles, who were completely abandoned by their husband! All of those noble women (all have left the cult) never wavered in feeling that raising their children was the blessing of their life! They didn't whine. Honestly--they did not think of their children as "burdens" or a "sacrifice" or a "humbling experience" at all. Most got motivated, and fought back, and went out into the world, to feed their kids. These feisty women didn't think they could "do it", either, but they had no choice but to try. They had no husband and his salary to rely on, no health insurance sometimes, no fancy house. Humility is plugging away, and these mothers' and grandmothers' prayers were to keep from starving. They gave no thought to whether they could make a good impression with their fireside talk, or whether they could measure up as an arm-piece, or whether they could keep the household help in line. Humility is loving your children enough to think they are a success, when they are slinging hamburgers, or adjusting skis on Sundays, or doing some other "demeaning" job. Sister Bednar would have felt like an abject failure, if she were to have to live like these humble single mothers.
Mormons really have it down, to demonstrate "humility", and feel superior at the same time.
Don't misunderstand--I feel very sorry for Sister Bednar. She has a banquet of abundance, but something is keeping her from enjoying any of it. An abusive husband can be worse than a disease. Well, except that there's a cure, and Sister Bednar wouldn't dream of freeing herself from her life. If she got divorced, then she would REALLY be humble!