Curious if you are or you know anyone who went on the rigmarole to leave and then for whatever reason decided to be a TBM again. And what would that reason be? That brings out a hidden question: Although LDS church is crazy as we all know if, but with a cool headed, rational mind, resentment, injustice, brainwashing aside, what do you think is good about the TSCC?
I think these questions could help me understand TSCC better in a way.
PS: I'm a nevermo, and pretty fucking far from ever be a mo, just wanna understand better about this whole deal.

from what I gather so far, the only people that left the church and then returned are those who got heavily brainwashed and felt that it was still fundamentally wrong to steer away from the church.

Yeah, I left because I wanted to sin. I finally got tired of all the sinning, so I went back. Don't get me wrong, the sinning was great sinning, but it just got soooooo boring and I needed to get out of the sinning rut.

fossilman Wrote:
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> Yeah, I left because I wanted to sin. I finally
> got tired of all the sinning, so I went back.
> Don't get me wrong, the sinning was great sinning,
> but it just got soooooo boring and I needed to get
> out of the sinning rut.

Yeah. I got bored with sin when slithering naked on a bare waterbed mattress with 5 whores covered in Orville Redinbacker's butter flavored popcorn oil with on a cocaine and Jack Daniel's bing got old. I said enough of this shit, repented and went back to church.

I'm sure there are many. A lot depends on why they left. Some may decide facts don't matter and the emotional and social benefits outweigh being an outsider.

Remember many people lose their family because of the church, so they may decide to stay with family, with or without the church.

Some may become especially effective at rationalizing how "it could still be basically true" or maybe they truly respond to guilt or fear regarding an afterlife.

I think one should distinguish between becoming a TBM and returning to the church for other reasons. Once Toto has the curtain pulled back, the wizard can never be un-seen.

I have read posters accounts of staying, or returning, to the church for other, and sometimes temporary, reasons. These include attending a relative's marriage, keeping a marriage together (for love of spouse, good of the children, etc.), legal minor status, or simply "it's just not worth the problems" to leave outright.

I can think of one poster with a situation such as you describe, bcole2. A woman* left the church years ago, and took her young teen children with her, and they all lived as some combination of lapsed or ex-Mormons. Then, to her surprise, her daughter went active as a mature adult, very active, and recently had a temple wedding. Why? Elohim knows!

*She's posted this herself, but I'll let her personally weigh in on the matter.

Once in a great while someone who has formally resigned goes back. It's rare, but it happens. As for inactives and those who were excommunicated, a certain percentage go back, but I'm not sure what that is.

The church proudly rebaptizes all of the people that have resigned and or have been excommunicated. It's the Mormon way just like baptizing and doing temple work for Holocaust victims.

What do you think is good about the TSCC?

-polygamy
-lying for the lord
-building malls
-invisible financial records
-blaming members
-not answering questions
-praising Joe Smith
-hailing Brigham Young
-BYU honor code
-hateful policies for gays, women and children
-elderly abuse (get them 80 year olds to scrub toilets)
-youth suicides
-opidemic in Ut
-hiding sexual abuse
-no temple divorces

hahah.. that'll do.

Unless they're willing to live a life of playacting.

I left because of false doctrine.

I know two women who were jack Mormons and one who was born again evangelical type- wild to core growing up with booze and getting pregnant. At the time they wanted nothing to do with church.

Then they got older and, I presume, wanted to keep their children from doing the same crazy risky stuff. They became dogmatic church ladies dragging their kids to church and Bible study all the time. So, I guess that could be another type who clings to the police-churches.

Returning to a cult happens. For many, it is all the world they are comfortable in. Over the years I have gotten to know JWs who returned to the Watchtower after their disfellowshipment. (If that is such a word.) The feeling was that they would be lost without 'Mother'. I don't know the percentages of those who discover the truth of Mormonism after being a true believer and then returning the the cult. In most cases it is to keep family harmony or retain business connections. The reason for returning is rarely of fully believing again for those who discovered the truth. These folks usually become cafeteria Mormons picking what they want to believe or participate in.

When I first began learning about the true history of Mormonism, I went through a period of re-engagement. I wouldn't call it relapse, since I was minimally active this whole time, if miserable.

One of my LDS Institute instructors claimed that he left the church. As I recall, it was something to do with the Solomon Spaulding manuscript and/or the Salamander letter. I guess whatever questions he had about it were resolved. I was the only person in the class who had any idea who Solomon Spaulding is, because there was a footnote about it in Talmadge's Articles of Faith book. Knowledge: a sign of impending apostasy.

I used to regularly see "inactives" return to church after the death of a loved one. After a few months they dissapeared again.

I don't know about any others but I am one they will never get to return....

Also I can't imagine how badly they would treat someone who left and then returned, considering how badly they treat the shiny new converts who naively come in with hope, seeking...seeking...



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 04/11/2019 04:22PM by mel.

I observed people return to the church after being disciplined by the church. I'm talking big time punishment like being incarcerated for months and years. Members and leaders treated these poor people like dirt. In fact, I think some of them would treat steer manure better than these individuals that made a series of poor choices. They wanted to make them an example when you leave the teachings of the church.

messygoop Wrote:
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> Members and leaders treated these poor people like dirt.

Good to know and to remember.

Gone is good. Don't return. :)

I recall listening to a Mormon Stories podcast featuring Tom Christofferson a few years ago. He is the gay brother of D. Todd Christofferson of the Big 12. At the time, Tom was promoting his book about coming back to LD$ Inc. after "living in sin" with his partner. Of course, the Deseret News and KSL promoted the hell out of the book.

I remember feeling sad for him that he admitted he would probably spend the rest of his life alone and celibate. Sounds like fun.

I can remember only one over the last 20 years where someone left the church and came back and became someone who was a 'serious member' who would accept a calling.

The Stake paraded him around the Stake to speak in each ward of his 'amazing story' of how he left and had some 'spiritual reawakening'.

Whether he stayed active ---- don't know didn't personally know him.

I know there are some. But in all my years, and it's been many, I've never seen someone who voluntarily left and resigned their membership, return and ask to be re-baptized. I've seen several who have been excommunicated and then did that, though.

As I said, there have to be some who have resigned and been re-baptized, but they are few and far between.

Whenever I find myself being tempted by acquaintances to come back - usually indirectly, e.g. FHE, outdoor activity, volunteer work, concert, etc. - I login to RFM.

Immediately settles the matter.

levantlurker Wrote:
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> Whenever I find myself being tempted by acquaintances to come back - usually indirectly...

Yes, they don't want to engage personally with you. Just send the missionaries or drop off some invitation at your door. Cowardly!

Glad you come here for a refresher, me too!!! Don't want to get sucked back in, in a moment of weakness.

I have known only one.

Of course, just like there are relapsed alcoholics.

I’m amazed at the absurdities I used to believe. I kind of like GC talks because they reinforce the correctness of my decision to leave. All of that bat shit crazy can’t be good.

I have less junk in my trunk than I used to, but a lot of it is deeply ingrained. I will have to actively weed it out and contain it. It’s a serious meditative exercise, a bit beyond the intellect.

I don't get how people can go back after finding out all the church's dirty laundry. If friends and family want to throw me under the bus., they can all go f@#k themselves.Thank you and have a nice day.

I've known a couple of people, who as they got older and developed health problems, returned to church. They called it "cramming for finals" and filed it under the "just in case it's true" rationalization.
Really silly once they've seen the truth about the church.

Some people just can’t get along without their tribe.

(senior moment, honest)

Maxine Hanks was one of the "September 6" who was ex-communicated in September 1993. She's the only one who's returned to church membership (D. Michaeol Quinn is also very much a believer, albeit gay, but he hasn't rejoined the church).

I actually met her at an Exmormon Conference; I think she was there seeing one of Will Bagley's presentations, and to my eyes, she was enjoying being a "bit of celebrity." As I recall, we discussed a bit of psychology, and she didn't strike me as particularly sophisticated.

Steve Benson knows her; perhaps he'll decide to pop back in and say something at some point.

Hmmm, I thought I just posted on this thread but don't see my post. I will type it again:

I resigned and considered going back as a religious humanist but soon came to my senses. I explain it here:

https://www.postmormonperspective.com/2018/08/introduction-new-mormon-perspectives.html

Scroll down to "My Brief Phase of Experimentation as a Post-Mormon"



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 04/12/2019 05:25PM by wonderfull.

When I was a ward mission leader, the missionaries baptized an attractive lady. Soon the stake president took especial interest in her, in counseling, guiding, flowering her with attention - because well she was new and needed fellowship of the stake president kind for sure. He took a "hands on" approach, giving the "laying on of hands" an entirely different spin, which became "laying on of his entire body" on her..lol. Yeah they did the unmentionable - this is a family site.

Long story short, he was married. She was married. She divorced. They lived together for several months eventually parting ways. The Stake President did not divorce, but returned to his wife. There he has been for several years now, going to the cult church services week after week. How he could show up at the Mormon cult every Sunday is a an exercise on an emotional torture. I couldn't do it. He has been a Mormon freak show of sorts. Ouch.

I've met a few BIC recovering alcoholics and substance abusers who became super active after reaching sobriety. I assume it's 1) out of desperation to not fall back into old habits by surrounding themselves with "wholesome" individuals and 2) feeling in debt to their member families and friends.

I can relate. After freshman year of college I was physically and mentally spent and exhausted from non-stop partying; abusing alcohol and drugs. I longed for a tribe and something different. The LDS student society was there waiting.

Maybe someone who loves/ misses the smell of their toilet cleaner.