Posted by:
beeblequix
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Date: September 21, 2010 02:06AM
http://www.ldschurchtemples.com/schedules/Temple quote:
"Temples are places of personal revelation. When I have been weighed down by a problem or a difficulty, I have gone to the House of the Lord with a prayer in my heart for answers. The answers have come in clear and unmistakable ways."
—Ezra Taft Benson
My visits to the temple included:
1. sleepiness
2. boredom
3. my ears usually went red and my head started feeling achy and internal pressure
4. that What-The-FLIP-feeling --
a. why are we wearing this ridiculous garb? A green apron? Serious? Don't we usually wear these in the kitchen? Where's those big oven mitts?
b. why so caught up on performing secret handshakes and close embraces with people I'd rather not touch with a 10 meter cattleprod?
c. what's with touching my upper ass anyway with your "holy oil"? Hands off dirtbag!
d. so we actually put names in a box, generically pray on that box and somehow God is supposed to know what's in there? What if someone put an M&M wrapper in there? Would Mars, Inc.'s stock go up?
5. offense to sensibilities
a. forcing women to cover their faces just never felt good
b. playing Mormon Twister in a prayer circle -- boy-girl-boy-girl...elbow-shoulder-elbow-shoulder...ya do the hokie pokie and you turn yourself around...
c. bowing my head and saying "yes" always felt so 1984ish.
d. repetition of prayer always sounded like chanting and I felt as if my thoughts were being replaced by Mr. Prayercirclecguy's thoughts
6. personal boundaries always felt torn down from start to finish (temple recommend interview to finishing a session and noticing how I had a definite mark in my forehead....)
Temples are a great place for personal revelation -- it's been revealed to me that I flippin' hate going there. I physically don't feel good there. I don't feel like men & women are equal as I see Peter Priesthood standing there next to his faceless, formless property, er, wife. I rarely could get anything out of the ceremony other than the belief that GOD is the most anal retentive being in all of fiction. And all the handshakes, tithing, being Chief Janitor every few weeks, reading only faith-promoting propaganda, teaching only faith-promoting propaganda, being constantly confused trying to make logical sense out of Momronism...it's just maddening.....argh! I think my senses should be trusted, but on the other hand the Church years ago came into my mind like a rhinoceros and told me how I couldn't trust my own wisdom and had to trust theirs instead.....Man I feel confused...And I'm still LDS, just a bit dysfunctional. Thanks for letting me rant.