Posted by:
jdoubledub
(
)
Date: May 30, 2019 07:14PM
So here's the rundown: my ex and I have joint custody of our children. We live in AZ and I have the kids every M,Tu, she has them every W, Th, and we alternate weekends. Essentially, a 5-2-2-5 schedule.
I take the kids to school every tuesday and wednesday due to that schedule, and she takes them every thursday and friday mornings. Then, when it's our weekend, we will take them monday to school.
Summer is the same, except no school. So on wednesdays, I want my ex to come by and get the kids (I pick them up on my days) before I go to work, even though they are old enough to be at home, because she is untrustworthy and has stolen from me in the past. She has even used the kids to 'steal', i.e, asking them to grab stuff from my house and then not sending it back with them later.
So, I asked her to please pick up the kids on wednesday mornings before I leave for work at 8am. She responded, "I am not on your schedule and if I cannot do that then I will not. For the time being, unless I inform you otherwise, I will be picking the kids up on wednesdays (which is her day) between 10 and 11. You can give our kids a key and they can lock up."
I should note, that before this, I asked her not to schedule things for the kids on my parenting time, something that she has done on countless occassions. She responded that she can do whatever she wants as their mother and that I can't tell her what to do. Very mature, I know.
I am trying to think of a response that isn't combative, is brief, and straight to the point (like in the BIFF book, if you've read it), but am having a hard time not getting emotional and telling her off. Need help. What I need is simple: for her to come on her day, when she is responsible for the kids, and pick them up before i go to work so I can lock up and make sure she doesn't steal anything. But she responds in her messages that I am bossing her around on her day, even though she is ordering me to keep the kids at MY house and is telling me how to lock up MY house. She basically told me that Wednesdays are hers and she can do whatever she wants on those days, even when the kids are staying at my house, including telling me to keep the kids until she feels like arriving. Does she have anything keeping her from coming early before I go to work? Absolutely nothing; she just wants to sleep in. I don't know if that makes any sense, but she is impossible to work with.
What do you think?