Date: August 11, 2019 02:43PM
I wish I had an exact quote, but I was reading about PTSD, and the psychiatrist said, "To deny the experiences of a PTSD patient is like making him suffer all over again."
This is what is happening to us. The cult denies that it ever treated Blacks differently, and it denies that our primary and Sunday school teachers taught us that Blacks were inferior souls. It denies that they taught us that the Catholic Church was the evil "Great and Abominable Church". Luckily, I was able to overcome my prejudices against Catholics and Blacks--but it did take a bit of work, at first! Realizing that these prejudices are WRONG, was a big help. Paying attention to my own heart helped me, too. I felt horrible, inside, when I had bad thoughts towards others, and Mormonism was trying to teach me to hate: Blacks, Catholics, Atheists, Apostates, drinkers, smokers, people with tattoos, promiscuous people, people who couldn't afford tithing, people who disobeyed the Mormon rules, and, even hate myself when I wasn't perfect enough.
Once I understood that this brainwashing was destructive and anti-love and anti-christian, I studied, got to know people of different cultures, tried to understand them, appreciated their unique life experiences, etc. I'm so ashamed of the racism and hatred of my parents, and of my religion, that I will probably never get over the shame of it. I was teased in high school for being a Mormon, and my ancestors were among those first polygamous neighbors of JS.
The best you can do is work to correct those wrong beliefs, those bad attitudes, and the idiotic superstitions that have been brainwashed into you, and move forward with your life. Maybe, even if the Mormon Cult were still intact today, no one could ever fully understand what your Mormon life was like.
I find it best for me to not mention my cult past, at all. Oh, I'll warn people, and answer questions, and try to help present-day victims--but I don't like to re-live past details.
Maybe it would be helpful for you to write down your past experiences, so the FACTS about the cult will be recorded. I would recommend that you write and publish your exit story here on RFM, in that section.
Yes--all of what you endured was REAL! The Mormon cult is gas-lighting all of us.
I have the most problems with the on-going Mormon scam, in the present--how it is ruining my family relationships, making my Mormon grandchildren less happy, and less confident--especially the females. It's an unnecessary time-waster, and a downer. I resent how it robs people of their money and builds expensive, useless temples and malls. I dislike the arrogance and entitelment the Mormons feel, when they express their superiority, and act like the laws don't apply to them.
Most of all, I hate how they get away with child abuse and spousal abuse. If you hope to ever see retribution, or apologies, or "owning up" to wrong-doing--the Mormon cult will never do that--never.
Therapy helped me move on from my past Mormon horrors (which were extreme), I highly recommend it, with a non-Mormon therapist, of course.
I'm still stuck with low self-esteem and shame for my past stupidity. I also feel guilty for having my children baptized Mormons, though we all resigned together. The cult still has a stranglehold on one of my children, and I take the blame for that.
I would be GLAD if the terrible Mormon cult disappears altogether! This is a heritage you don't want to hang onto! Let it go, and keep on moving forward!
IMO, the Mormon "church" has already ceased to exist. It's nothing but a real estate and business holding company, bleeding its few members of their money and free labor.
Would it be easier for you to think about the fact that Mormonism never had anything to do with God or Christ in the first place?
Create your OWN "heritage", for your progeny, moving forward! I have kept most of our "family traditions" that were positive, uplifting and bonding. If you deconstruct these, you will realize the these had nothing to do with Mormonism, whatsoever! All the holiday traditions (Mormons don't have Christmas service or an Easter about Christ, no Halloween, Thanksgiving or July Fourth, etc). Weekend barbecues, family camping and hikes, skiing, hobbies, pets, whatever you love about life--enjoy them in the present moment. Mormonism puffs itself up to be more important that it really is.