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Posted by: schrodingerscat ( )
Date: September 28, 2019 12:07PM

...fill in the blank,

I'm interested.

I think we all are.

Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 09/28/2019 05:19PM by schrodingerscat.

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Posted by: schrodingerscat ( )
Date: September 28, 2019 12:11PM

....I had to be honest with myself,

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Posted by: schrodingerscat ( )
Date: September 28, 2019 12:17PM

More importantly, I had to be honest with my children, and their children, and theirs.
Even though I had been able to overcome the cognitive dissonance of belonging to a racist, sexist, homophobic institution, I could no longer maintain my silence, while my kids were being brainwashed to sing the praises of a sexual predator, in a church with a serious sexual abuse problem.
When I finally went back it was like a GD movie.
I nearly had to bite my tongue in half to resist blurting out, so everybody in my son's scout camp could hear, "It's a FRAUD!" When the scout master told us that we all needed to emulate the life of Joseph's Myth. I wanted to say, "I dunno, I kinda like just having one wife and not abusing my power to sesually exploit, I mean rape, other mens wives and teenage children."

My heart raced. It just was not healthy environment for me.
But I'm sure overlooking and excusing the massive abuse going on in the church you identify with works for you, so you be you.
As for me, I refuse to allow my children to be brainwashed to believe they should sing the praises of a sexual predator who started your Doomsday CULT and had sex with his follower's wives and teenage children.

I actually care about my children,

No success in the Doomsday CULT of Joseph's Myth Sycophants makes up for failure to protect your children from a known sexual predator, just because he was an 'authority' figure to you.

And I care about the children after them.

I think terms of 11 generations,
the 5 before me,
my generation and
the 5 after me.

I'm with the 5 generations after ours.
I'm with my kids.
It's their world.

I think the 3 before me might have been proud of the fact that I was the first one in our family to do the math and figure out that it really didnt't add up and I wasn't falling for the abusive bullshit I inherited, just because I inherited it.

Edited 4 time(s). Last edit at 09/28/2019 05:23PM by schrodingerscat.

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Posted by: dagny ( )
Date: September 28, 2019 12:12PM

Einstein or some famous atheist said so.

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Posted by: elderolddog ( )
Date: September 28, 2019 12:17PM

So I can brag about how clever and tuned-in I am!

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Posted by: saucie ( )
Date: September 28, 2019 08:14PM

I discovered from this site what a complete pile of bogus

garbage the mormon church is so I resigned my membership.

Yay me.

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Posted by: Lethbridge Reprobate ( )
Date: September 28, 2019 12:25PM

So they'd f***ing leave me alone after dad died. It worked.

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Posted by: valkyriequeen ( )
Date: September 28, 2019 12:43PM

like the Cowardly Lion, I finally got some courage.

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Posted by: Greyfort ( )
Date: September 28, 2019 01:02PM

I found out that the organization which presented itself to me as God's one and only true church upon the face of the earth ... isn't.

(Edited to change "wasn't" into "isn't" because it still isn't.)

Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 09/28/2019 01:04PM by Greyfort.

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Posted by: Done & Done ( )
Date: September 28, 2019 01:21PM

I realized the Mormon church was poison. Special thanks to SWK, BKP, and Dallin. You made it so easy.

OH, and a little thing called . . . integrity.

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Posted by: nolongerangry ( )
Date: September 28, 2019 01:49PM

Forced baptism at 8. The constant superiority over others. And the BOM used as a threat.

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Posted by: Greyfort ( )
Date: September 28, 2019 02:56PM

nolongerangry Wrote:
> ... the BOM used as a threat.

That's what kept me in longer than I should have been. It took me to come to the point where I realized it was all bogus to finally find the courage to leave and at that point it was easy.

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Posted by: shylock ( )
Date: September 28, 2019 01:51PM

Was always a questioner... when I figured out they had all the answers without any of the questions I packed my bags... never have looked back...

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Posted by: heartbroken ( )
Date: September 28, 2019 03:28PM

I just couldn't take it anymore! I was the right puzzle piece trying to fit myself into the wrong puzzle. I kept forcing myself and finally accepted that I wasn't a good fit in the Mormon puzzle.

It is such a relief to no longer force myself to believe in fairytale nonsense. My brain is so much more at peace.

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Posted by: cl2 ( )
Date: September 28, 2019 03:37PM

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Posted by: Unindoctrinated ( )
Date: September 28, 2019 04:10PM

TSCC/leadership forced me to choose between them and my kids. I chose my kids. That’s what they get for trying to call my bluff.

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Posted by: jacob ( )
Date: September 28, 2019 04:22PM

Uhm, because I used to be Mormon?

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Posted by: Screen Name ( )
Date: September 28, 2019 04:48PM

I am ex-Mormon because the inspired leadership that had jurisdiction over me during my darkest moments proved to me, by their acts, that they were mere mortals.

Case in point. I once ministered to a young lady who was homeless. I was young, and my heart was not covered yet with scars. One day, I brought her groceries in the small apartment I somehow afforded to place her in. When I put the goods away in the cupboard, she attacked me, and begged me to make love to her.

I did as she desired. At the finish, I cried out, "Do you know what has been done?"

I felt so lost, destroyed and terrified for my eternal soul that I went straight to my Bishop and poured out my soul to him.

He lifted the phone and called the Stake President. Dryly, he said, Brother Name has just boasted to me about his sins. I feel it's time a Court was convened to deal with him."

Shortly thereafter, the inspired Brethren, in a Court of Love, kicked me out like a football.

Some sinners require this act. I was not among them.

To me the church meant much more to me than my life.

But after I returned home, I realized deep down that the church was a fake, and that I had been terribly abused.

Over the years, I have come to full peace between me and my God, if there is one.

The church is a harmful tribe that warps individuals, families and even entire populations. It grooms men and women from childhood to be loving to the worthy.

This is the opposite of what Jesus Christ spent His time teaching.

Lest you assume that I was loose with my sexuality, please be aware that I had never sinned sexually before nor since that fateful day.

My mother instilled in each of us the sacred nature of our bodies and the seriousness of casually playing with the fountains of life.

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Posted by: babyloncansuckit ( )
Date: September 29, 2019 03:13AM

You got off cheap. I wish my bishop or SP had screwed me over.

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Posted by: Whoooa! ( )
Date: October 06, 2019 02:15AM

Talk about leadership roulette. In my most pious moments I'd have known better than to admit that to leadership. So did you end up with the formerly homeless girl. Obviously you cared a great deal for her and gave in to her advances in spite of your strong beliefs.

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Posted by: schrodingerscat ( )
Date: September 28, 2019 05:16PM

I followed the evidence to its logical conclusion, it's a fraud.
When I did, I said to myself, outloud, "It's a fraud!"
And suddenly all the cognitive dissonance I'd accumulated over my previous 40 years, suddenly lifted and I felt much lighter.
I felt liberated. I felt like the captive of Plato's cave, who was born in the cave and was raised to believe the shadows projected onto the walls of the cave were all there was to reality.
THen one day I saw a light outside the cave and I followed it.
When I got there, I saw rainbows and volcanoes and oceans and the rivers in between them. I came back in the cave to tell the others how wonderful it was outside the cave, if they just turned around and saw the light, but they chose the shadows on teh walls and reprimanded me for wandering outside the walls of the cave.
I was austicized for questioning the group's foundational myths, even though it was clearly apparent to me that this was all just a movie projected on the wall and that reality, outside was far, far more beautiful, healthy and true.
They hated me for pointing out reality to them.
I was disowned by my own family, hated, because I stood up for their kids when their kids were being abused.
I got my kids out.
Not everybody's so lucky.
I stand up for them.
I speak up for them and refuse to remain silent, as long as my loved ones remain captivated and are abused and exploited by the charlitans who brainwashed them to sing the praises of a pedophile.

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Posted by: azsteve ( )
Date: September 28, 2019 05:53PM

I once put my trust in several church members and they let me down. That's not a reason to leave. I once put my trust in Mormon church leaders and they let me down. That's not necessarily a good reason to leave either. Working together like a well-oiled machine, several church members and church leaders did things to harm my life and they made it clear afterward that they would do it again, given the opportunity. That's why I left. If I ever see a written apology from the church and on church letterhead to me, I'll listen to what they have to say after that. Considering how seriously the church takes its responsibilities to do the right thing, I would rather just flush money down the toilet and expect some good to come of it. At least if you flush money down the toilet, there is a remote possibility that it will do some good for someone somewhere. With the Mormon church, you know someone's going to get hurt every time, eventually.

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Posted by: Screen Name ( )
Date: September 28, 2019 08:52PM

I would like to be your plumber.

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Posted by: severedpuppetstrings ( )
Date: September 28, 2019 08:37PM

In a nutshell - Mormonism is a fraud, created by a money-hungry, power-hungry sex-crazed conman. I couldn't sing the praises of such a man after finding out the truth about him. Much less "follow" him. i.e. "Follow the prophet.

After discovering the racist teachings, I could not accept the church's justifications behind it, or why the Priesthood ban had taken place. Especially as a woman of colour. I couldn't pretend that I was okay with it, or being on the receiving end of the racism I experienced while in that cult.

I didn't like being disconnected from the world around me, because it was "safe" and "a good shelter" to remain within the Mormon Bubble/Community.

Personal honesty and integrity. I tried to stay in the church, because I thought that it was still fundamentally good despite the past (and current) skeletons in their closet. But I couldn't pretend that I believe in the religion and its so-called prophets, past and present. Some months after I came to the conclusions that I did about TSCC, the bishopric tried to force me to take a calling where I would teach primary (as a ploy to keep me from becoming "inactive" I'm sure). I couldn't do it. I also couldn't play a role. Even before, it was hard to plaster a smile on my face and pretend that my life was "peachy keen" just because I had the so-called "gospel." I've met a lot of phony, "perfect" people in my last ward. I really didn't want to continue to be one.

Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 09/28/2019 09:04PM by severedpuppetstrings.

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Posted by: babyloncansuckit ( )
Date: September 28, 2019 11:25PM

Church would have been okay except that I’d have been surrounded by Mormons. That’s a problem for me. That and I can’t sustain the leadership on any level.

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Posted by: DNA ( )
Date: September 29, 2019 12:46AM

Being a mormon wasn't enjoyable.

But I felt like I had to do it, or I'd go to hell. And I believed it because God had a face to face chat with JS and told him to tell me.

Once I found that JS never had that chat, and was a liar and a con man, I was free to jump ship!

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Posted by: Susan I/S ( )
Date: September 29, 2019 03:34AM

The hypocrisy stunned me. I knew wonderful people who were "of color" and gay (even though I really didn't understand) and a lot of WONDERFUL people who were ex or nevermo. I knew a lot of mormons who were major assholes. I knew a lot of mormons that acted one way when other mormons were watching and a whole other way when they were not. I did NOT believe that God wanted MMM. Nope. God doesn't want you to kill people.

The final straw for me was finding out what went on in the temple. Dude, that WHACK! I could not believe God wanted you to do something so damn stupid. Magic handshakes? New secret names? And the clothes, good lord the clothes. Yes, I was a horrible child and peeked into the super secret temple suitcase.

Then as I got older and learned more of the doctrine I saw just how dumb and manipulative so much of it was. Church history was NOT on their side. I saw them start to lie about it. I am so old I remember the tours of BY's houses and allllll those poor women.

I got out as soon as I could and no way in hell would I raise a child in that mess.

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Posted by: LJ12 ( )
Date: September 29, 2019 04:10AM

It’s all based on lies, a complete fraud.
It is a cult, sociologically and theologically.
It is socially unpleasant and psychologically damaging to be a mormon, and on top of that, spiritually abusive.
Even if there were some benefits to being a mormon, as there might be for some people, i still would consider it morally wrong for me to be a part of something like this.
Overall it made me miserable and destroyed my sense of self as well as my self esteem.
Mormons are not pleasant to be around and I don’t like the way they behave. They are narrow minded, deluded, judgmental and prejudiced.
The mormon church is against gay people, non-white people, and I misogynistic. It’s prejudice and hatred is sickening.
The mormon church is controlling and abusive in many ways.

And because not being mormon is so much better in every way.

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Posted by: messygoop ( )
Date: September 29, 2019 04:44AM

I was kicked out of the tribe. It was just as well because I was never a good fit anyways. It didn't work out for me. I hated being where I was supposed to feel the greatest level of spirituality, the temple.

Life is so much better without the church.

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Posted by: Honest TB[long] ( )
Date: September 29, 2019 05:24AM

That word is a victory for Satan so I shall refer to my self as [too long of a phrase to write because it takes too long] and thus people can see how non clueless we are in this beloved Church.

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Posted by: doyle18 ( )
Date: September 29, 2019 01:37PM

I was also a questioner and the evidence showed that it was just a cult based on fiction so some pervert could sleep around with as many women and girls as he wanted.

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Posted by: cludgie ( )
Date: September 29, 2019 01:46PM

My 2007 epiphany was a "WTF moment," when I discovered that important dates were changed when the "Book of Commandments" morphed into "The Doctrine and Covenants." Dates were obviously changed to make the D&C jibe with already-narrated events, and to string the story along in a more believable sequence. It really got me pissed off. During my time on Google, trying to get to the bottom of all this, I discovered Recovery from Mormonism, and learned even more. I also learned that there were people like me who had been led down the same path, and discovered that people could simply resign their membership. By the end of 2007, I decided to exit the church. I was serving overseas, and waited until my return to the states in 2008 to tell anyone. Then I resigned on Jan. 1, 2009.

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Posted by: cludgie ( )
Date: September 29, 2019 01:57PM

(Actually, I just wanted to sin.)

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Posted by: Susan I/S ( )
Date: September 30, 2019 05:01AM

Oh lol Cludgie! I just knew it ;)

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Posted by: thedesertrat1 ( )
Date: September 29, 2019 06:23PM

with alittle bit of luck
with alittle bit of luck
better judgement was what played right out

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Posted by: ufotofu ( )
Date: September 29, 2019 11:42PM

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Posted by: Soft Machine ( )
Date: September 30, 2019 05:16AM

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Posted by: Now a Gentile ( )
Date: September 30, 2019 09:48AM

I was talking with my then-EQP and he made the comment that one can not live a lie. Up to that point, I was living a lie. Not any more.

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Posted by: angela ( )
Date: October 02, 2019 09:31AM

It's a fraud

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Posted by: nolongerangry ( )
Date: October 02, 2019 09:53AM

Their fake smile. Also the fact that they have to promote happiness so hard. No one is naturally as happy them. It is odd.

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Posted by: Human ( )
Date: October 02, 2019 09:55AM

I am an ex-mormon because...

...after seeing through it, I couldn’t pretend that the culture was worth pretending for, so I stopped pretending.

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Posted by: Done & Done ( )
Date: October 02, 2019 10:16AM

Exactly. That is why I was thrilled to find out Mormonism was false. I was suddenly free to find my own sub-culture, my own people. And I did. And I am a million times happier.

Of course being in the "culture" of BYU when I realized the lie was an extra reason to fly out of there like a bat out of hell.

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Posted by: Human ( )
Date: October 02, 2019 10:35AM

I rejoice your dash for freedom, dash for others like yourself. That had to be elating.

As for myself, mormons were more “my people” than not. I wanted to remain, even while no longer believing. And even after reading the JofD and the History, and learning about the early church, and the monstrosity names BY, I still tried to hang on and say that was then this is now.

But the now part began to fade in appearance. The sub-culture wasn’t worth it, and so I stopped pretending.

I had no group or other sub-culture to run to. So the first two or three years were very painful, and it took about five years all told before I truly felt good about leaving the sub-culture behind. Frankly, had not my wife also questioned and concluded for herself (three children were still under 4), independently, I might still be Mormon today. *shudder*

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Posted by: Done & Done ( )
Date: October 02, 2019 10:47AM

I know my case is unusual. I get what you are saying.

Where I come from is a small Mormon pioneer town in the mountains of Utah and the people are wonderful. They are for the most part not like the people you read about on RFM. When my dad built his house everyone just showed up to help on Saturdays. People just show up with food when you need it and not because they were assigned to do it. Very few are judgemental at all.

Had I realized the church was false but been in that environment (and not been gay) then the subculture might have been more tempting to cling to. I might have been one of those who kept on the rose colored glasses and thought of all the supposed good the church does in spite of not being true. I might have felt lost and pained as you say.

Even now when I go back everyone is so happy to see me and catch up even knowing I am a big gay apostate. Still want hugs and laughs.

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Posted by: Human ( )
Date: October 02, 2019 11:03AM

I love your stories about where you came from, written here and elsewhere. And I love more that you were able to get away and get to where you truly belonged.

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Posted by: Done & Done ( )
Date: October 02, 2019 11:06AM

Thank you, Human.

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Posted by: nolongerangry ( )
Date: October 02, 2019 10:36AM

The sad part is the TMB's are so brainwashed that they have no clue the cult is just that. A huge lie. There needs to be a movement started to seriously expose the cult for what it really is and to get the brainwashed masses the help that they need.

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Posted by: Bruce A Holt ( )
Date: October 02, 2019 08:56PM

I claimed JS was a fraud. Online (Facebook). I declined to take it down when leadership requested it. They excommunicated me.

I am now a very happy exMormon.

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Posted by: Elder Berry ( )
Date: October 07, 2019 02:19PM

I remember that and I admired it and still do!

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Posted by: rosysam ( )
Date: October 02, 2019 09:53PM

I couldn't afford to be a Mormon!

That's what I tell the missionaries now, and they have no response and just leave.

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Posted by: Elder Berry ( )
Date: October 07, 2019 02:20PM

They didn't attempt their "blessings" hardsell?

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Posted by: hgc2 ( )
Date: October 02, 2019 10:11PM

I loved the church, the fellowship, the activities, even some of the meetings. I believe Mormon people are generally salt of the earth. I wanted to be a part of it.

But I came to realize you had to believe or ignore so many truth claims that are clearly untrue. Book of Mormon and Book of Abraham. The whole temple ceremony. And then I studied early Christian history and concluded that all religions are man made and rational evidence for the existence of the Christian/Mormon God is non-existence.

We are on our own, Folks.

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Posted by: Dr. No ( )
Date: October 02, 2019 10:24PM

Only much later did I find it is a total con job by a paedophile con artist

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Posted by: CA girl ( )
Date: October 03, 2019 08:29PM

the Mormon church lies. I don't hang out with liars. Pretty simple actually.

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Posted by: ufotofu ( )
Date: October 07, 2019 01:56PM

Thats pretty broken down (break it up).


I hate liars!

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Posted by: JadeDuck ( )
Date: October 03, 2019 11:35PM

Doctrinally, I don't believe Christ suffered for our sins in Gethsemane. That was the fact that allowed me to justify it.

That came long after I had felt something was wrong in the temple, feeling lesser-than for being a woman, and feeling surprisingly afraid of a God that doesn't send people to Hell.

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Posted by: johnboy23 ( )
Date: October 03, 2019 11:59PM

works before grace is a mockery of the cross. grace is a free gift and a peace that does not require vain mormon usless works.Mormon rightousness is nothing but filthy rags.

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Posted by: ufotofu ( )
Date: October 07, 2019 01:55PM

johnboy23 Wrote:
> works before grace is a mockery of the cross.
> grace is a free gift and a peace that does not
> require vain mormon usless works.Mormon
> rightousness is nothing but filthy rags.


So Be It

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Posted by: Screen Name ( )
Date: October 04, 2019 12:59AM

Life is too sacred for religion.

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Posted by: ufotofu ( )
Date: October 07, 2019 01:54PM



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Posted by: munchybotazv2 ( )
Date: October 06, 2019 01:00PM

Being Mormon felt weird, embarrassing, and oppressive. Plus it's pretty obvious there's no god ... certainly not the Mormon one who has many wives, picks a bunch of ridiculous old men to represent him, and always needs money.

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Posted by: KJ Tutu not signed in ( )
Date: October 08, 2019 11:04AM

I was fearful....I'd be punished. My family would suffer.

But When I felt brave enough to question the teachings, I felt relieved.

There was no only truth.

It was a man made all the others.

Nothing special....

And I'm not a worthy MAN priesthood holder....
As a woman I felt owned.

Bye Bye

Yes, I am a resigned ex mormon

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