Date: October 09, 2019 01:13AM
I wasn't a convert, but grew up in a church when temple attendance wasn't heavily pushed. My parents were active, but didn't hold recommends. They became temple ready in time for me to serve a mission. Even though I took a year long temple-prep class, it was very vague about what the hell actually transpired in the temple. Oh sure, I was told that you would make "certain" covenants, but I didn't know that I would promise to avoid loud laughter and give all my belongings to the church.
Garments were not mentioned at all. It was a shock to learn that the garments were to be worn ALL THE TIME. My god, it was bad enough that I was going to be wearing a suit, necktie and white shirt as a full time missionary, but also damn hot itchy underwear. (I already had the shock of my life being NAKED in the temple.) I remember being given the bottom garment while standing with a baby-doll length shield and having 3 men watching me cover my junk. I think the left knee cap touched the floor as I got my right leg through it. A cranky temple worker yelled. "Don't ever let them touch the ground. EVER!" It scared me to be yelled out that I almost lost my balance and again the garment touched the ground. A different worker yelled at me for being careless.
Added: I went with my Mom to the Beehive store (on the alley side of the DI) the day before. She had a conversation with the sales lady about what size I would need. The entire transaction took about 2 min. The sales lady said "Hold onto them until he gets to the temple. Don't let him look at them or open the bags. My Mom was very hush about it. I think she said that I needed to get some things that were needed for the temple.
I wish that I would have had a correct and proper sized poncho for the initiatory.
Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 10/09/2019 10:09AM by messygoop.
Date: October 09, 2019 03:20AM
But I still wasn't prepared for the ridiculous nothingness of the temple rituals.
All my life I grew hearing nothing but hype about the temple experience. Of course nobody could tell me any details because it was "too sacred." I had to wait and "be worthy" to go when the time came.
Based on the hype, I halfway expected to see supernatural things in the the temple. At a minimum, I expected to receive profound truths and answers to they mysteries, with details about the nature and reality, including the spirit realms, that simply were unavailable to anyone outside of the temple. I thought it would be a life-changing event.
Then I went for the first time. During the whole thing, I was shocked at how goofy and stupid each phase was. "Is this some kind of joke?"
But up to the end, I held out hope that the best was yet to be revealed. Well, it turned out that the climax of the entire series of rituals was doing a stupid hug with a guy hiding behind a curtain and then walking into a room that looked like a fancy hotel lobby.
"Maybe something special is going to happen in this room" Nope. As I stood there waiting for something...anything...that would match any of the hype I had heard all of my life, an old lady came up to me and suggested that I should get out because other people needed to come through.
I then spent then next 3 years or so with a voice screaming in my head "You've got to be forkin' kidding me!!! You. Have. Got. To. Be. Forkin'. Kidding. Meeeee!"
And, brothers and sisters, that's why the temple is so special to me. It's the experience that implanted the "you've got to be forkin' kidding me!!!" screaming voice in my head.
Date: October 12, 2019 01:52AM
Wally, your first temple trip was a lot like mine. All the hype and excitement contrasted with the SERIOUS let-down of the real thing.
I got in on the old-style throat-slitting and disemboweling gig. I remember thinking to myself, "Seriously? Is this weirding out anybody else? How am I supposed to keep a straight face with this malarkey going on??"
I wasn't shocked about the garmies. My VTs were cool and they told me all about them. Their descriptions were both accurate and very funny. For the first few months, I kept the eagle eye out to see who wore garmies and who did not. I felt like I had been elected into an elite group who got to wear the "magic skivvies," and I thought it was cool.
But after the novelty wore off, my youngest daughter took me skivvy shopping at Victoria's Secret, and that was even MORE fun. I know that you can get sensible underwear at WalMart, but there is just a certain caché about Victoria's Secret. While I wear some of their more conservative designs, they still out-flash Wally World, and my DH likes what I choose, so we are both happy.
Date: October 09, 2019 04:44AM
My mother showed me her garments, which were the old-fashioned one-piece flare-leg style. Women didn't want to take all their clothes off to go to the bathroom, so they had to pee through one of the flared legs! I guess they had sex that way.... No, I'm not joking. You can't make this stuff up. Garments were designed by men.
I got another shock, because my mother had taken out the seam from between the two legs, and had sewn the legs together, so it was like a mini-skirt slip. She sewed pretty lace around the bottom of the skirt, and around the neckline. She wore normal women's underwear underneath the "slip"--another no-no. My father refused to wear garments. He said they were uncomfortable, and the nylon made him hot. I think it was partly vanity, too, as they were very attractive people, and were social with a lot of non-Mormons.
Date: October 09, 2019 09:23AM
clotheslines, as did my parents. I had people who worked with me at Thiokol ask me about them as they saw them on clotheslines.
I had been single until I was 27 and all my friends were married and they made it a point to let me know that I wasn't finding someone. I was scared shitless to go through the temple. I don't like to not know ahead of time what is going to happen. I had been through enough with my gay/straight relationship dealing with leaders and I wasn't sure I even believed anymore, but if we were going to get married, it was all I knew and thought maybe there was hope this could work???? I wanted to elope and not get married in the temple. I was such a mess. Then I had to deal with my cousin about getting a TR and he didn't know anything about my relationship. I was to tell no one.
I had one thing going for me in that I knew what happened with the washing and anointing as a friend I worked with had heard you had to get naked, so I asked my sister about it. I told her if she didn't tell me, I was immediately leaving the church, so I was prepared for that.
I also remember sitting in the endowment session--after seeing my future husband in that hideous hat and I almost laughed out loud--and thinking, "This isn't the church I was raised in. What about the fact we don't have rituals like the Catholics?"
I was just RELIEVED to know what goes on at first. It just got worse as time went on as I thought about it and tried to go. The old ladies were meaner than hell. I don't deal well with that type of thing. Even on my wedding day, they were treating me horribly until my meek mother showed up. Just having her there, they backed off.
The garments were more of a "I'm finally part of the club" as I had been treated so poorly for so long by many of my friends (none of whom I speak to any longer). I had made it. Me, Lucy (my super duper special name that God had given me).
I went back very few times. I was a very devout mormon, as I know many here were. I just couldn't do it. It was NOT a good experience and it was bizarre (my dad even told me that years later).
I actually just thought everyone wore the garments until I was older. I just thought they were underwear that adults wore.
The reason I find myself on this board is that after being inactive for at least 10 years, I discussed why I couldn't stop wearing garments with my exmo therapist and he sent me here to read about garments. I laughed until I cried over posts on garments and I quit wearing them.
Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 10/09/2019 09:26AM by cl2.
Date: October 11, 2019 04:54PM
So...I bought into the idea of garments because they were connected to the temple which, you know, was the be-all and end-all until I actually went there.
And, it was the same with the garments. Yeah, I was shocked at how UGLY they were, how uncomfortable they were (try breast-feeding in them), and how easy it was to see if people wore them (or not). Wearing them made me feel as if I had a sign advertising that I had arrived and was now a confirmed member of something or other....because that thar temple ceremony was so weird, so juvenile, and sooo boring that I did not know what in the he!! I had walked into and crawled out of.
I felt I had been sold a rotten bale of goods in the name of the "most sacred experience of my life". Really? This is it? And, the ghastly garments were a constant reminder of the deception by the church. To me, the supposedly Golden experience was nothing but a really bad road show with coercive lines demanding that I devote everything--my time, money, and life--to the church, never asking me, just telling me.
Hmm....all this surely got me thinking.
Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 10/11/2019 04:56PM by presleynfactsrock.
Date: October 14, 2019 06:45PM
I didn't know anything about them until I was put in foster care with an LDS couple. The husband would run around the house in his G's, butt flap flapping in the breeze. Once I asked what the little wads were on the chest and belly, and he explained that they were "marks" that stood for stuff that he couldn't tell me about. If you'll recall, back then it was on pain of death if he told me. A year or so later, I accidentally walked in on his wife when she was clad in the full niqab of garments, bra, girdle, and stockings pulled up over the legs of the garments. Hm. Sexy. But I was pretty shocked, thinking WTF??, women wear them, too? And it was summertime in S. California.