True believers are apparently having a collective Morgasm over the COVID pandemic and, now, the SLC quake, sure that these are signs of the last days and that the return of Jesus is imminent.

If you know any mormons like this, giddy with excitement over the prospect of being at long last vindicated and crowned with millennial glory, please let them know that they are in grave apostasy; that they need to repent and confess to their bishop and/or SP to begin the appropriate disciplinary process.

For it was none other than the Prophet of the Restoration, even Joseph the Smith, he to whom they sing hymns of praise, and whose birth is joyfully celebrated each and every December, who prophesied that Jesus would not come in any year in which a rainbow appeared in the heavens:

"I have asked of the Lord concerning His coming; and while asking the Lord, He gave a sign and said, In the days of Noah I set a bow in the heavens as a sign and token that in any year that the bow should be seen the Lord would not come; but there should be seed time and harvest during that year: but whenever you see the bow withdrawn, it shall be a token that there shall be famine, pestilence, and great distress among the nations, and that the coming of the Messiah is not far distant." (History of the Church, Vol. 6, Ch. 10, p. 254)

Bruce McConkie added to it in his own writings:

"And the signs in heaven above are like nothing man has ever seen. Blood is everywhere; fire and vapors of smoke fill the atmospheric heavens. No man has seen a rainbow this year. And that great sign in the eastern sky – does it portend an invasion from outer space? Or is a collision with another planet imminent?" ("The Millennial Messiah," pp. 21-22)

As many rainbows have already been observed this year, per long-standing church doctrine which has never been disavowed, the Second Coming cannot possibly occur in 2020. The tiny toons of mormondom are kicking against their own church's clear teachings and need to be admonished and corrected.

Once again, please inform your mormon friends and neighbors that they are contradicting their own church, and must commence atoning for their sin. The looks on their faces will be priceless.

Being a good Mormon isn't about paying attention to the details.

Correct!

It seems that mormonism is best down with bold, broad strokes. Details are for sissies.

Joseph thought that rainbows happen by magic, not by optics. But I’m sure Mormons are gloating. The Apocalypse fell flat in Y2K but this time’s the charm.

Nah. If Jesus is sending earthquakes to knock off Morini's trumpet at "The" temple, I'm betting a lot of mormons are scared that it's a sign they chose the wrong team.

Aah...but morgasm Mormons are thinking this is sign that the trump of missionary work to all the world, that key requisite by Jesus, is now finished. Now is the time for pestilence, said my giddy TBM relatives today.

They shouldn't count on that.

If anyone had good cause to believe the end was near it was people who lived in the 1300s when The Black Death struck.
For many of them it was "the end" because millions died.

But here we are lol.
Life is high adventure and things would be very boring with the occasional ups and downs.

without

&*^^%@ computer

For sure. Now the Black Plague was for sure a sign of the Second Coming. Millions died. Half of Europe wiped out from it.

Or WW2 tens of millions dead from that war.

Today, nothing compares to what happened in the past.

Your post has done a great service to so many Mormons, Book of Mordor. You are as generous as you are informative.

What's with all the signs . . .
"Sign, sign, everywhere a sign
Blockin' out the scenery, breakin' my mind
Do this, don't do that, can't you read the sign?"

How about Matthew and Thessalonians 5:2? Jesus is coming like a thief in the night!

Which means he ain't comin' round the mountain when he comes. They ain't gonna be no signs. It's a surprise party and probably with a rainbow theme just to throw everyone off.

And all the earthquakes and blood everywhere and fire and vapors of smoke to fill the heavens, and the tornados and disease? Heck, that is all caused by the gays :) as every good bible thumper knows, and has nothing to do with Jesus finally remembering his appointment for a 2,000 year check-up.

“Once again, please inform your mormon friends and neighbors that they are contradicting their own church.”

Mormons contradicting their own church-an honored tradition for nearly 190 years.

The way I feel today, I'm up for it. I was up for it in Y2K and it didn't happen. How long am I going to have to wait?

My TBM daughter doesn't seem to think the end is coming, but she doesn't know all the old mormon prophecies.

Is it true that the SLC Temple is currently undergoing seismic upgrades?

If so, ChurchCo has to work on their timing...