Not sure what else to add. Sex- and tithing- seems to be the only defining feature of the institution. There is no theology any more. There is certainly no mysticism, and self-discovery is condemned with all their might. Is that the best they can come up with?

For reasons I won't go into, I just read the Wikipedia entry on Kolob.

I don't think mormons are equipped to do "Theolomagy", as my personal idol, Homer Simpson, would say. (Okay, Homer is no Einstein, but more people know "D'oh" than "E=McHammer".)

Is there any mormon theology that has not been bent over and thoroughly rogered?

This leaves mormonism with women's knees, bosoms, shoulders, and earlobes, where mormon theology shines bright again. Also, white shirts and no beards for men.

There, mormon theology lesson done!

Cliff's Notes Theology:

Catholicism is about making The Nicest Guy Who Ever Lived suffer even more.

Judaism is about food.

Mormonism is about sex.

Mainstream Protestantism is about weed-free lawns and Robert's Rules of Order

I don't know what Evangelical Protestantism is about. It seems a jumbled mess at the moment.

Evangelicals worry about "sin." Not just their sins, but yours and everybody else's. They fear Sky Daddy will punish them for what you do and allowing "sin" to happen and they fear Sky Daddy will blame them.

But what they call "sin" involves racism and bigotry in their version of "normality." They take Genesis literally and see themselves as having "dominion over all the fishes of the sea and the beasts of the Earth." Their religion grew out of an eighteenth century justification for slavery -- a spiritual "escape valve" as it were.

In their view, as long as they are in charge and they have free reign to run the world "free of sin" as they think it should be, Sky Daddy will be happy when he comes back home, none of the kids will get a beating, and everything will be "happy."

If you think this sounds like something you'd here from the Taliban, you'd be right. It's the same.



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 10/05/2020 11:17PM by anybody.

Evangelicals seem to be all about hell and how to get there and who will be there. And getting naked and flying into the air to meet jeebus.

Lol! I would say Catholicism is about guilt. You are a very bad person, and full of sin, but don't worry, if you hang your head in shame, the priest will wave his hand and utter some mumbo-jumbo, and make it all better. Bonus: Your fellow church members are no better than you are, so you might as well all lift a pint and be miserable sinners together. That's Catholicism in a nutshell.

> Lol! I would say Catholicism is about guilt.

Really? I thought that was Judaism--or Islam. . .

Yes, the religions of the desert are about guilt, but it comes in different flavors.

Catholic guilt is about how could you make The Nicest Guy Who Ever Lived suffer even more?

Jewish guilt is about how could you do this to the family? I suspect that applies to Islam as well.

Mormon guilt is about how could you do this to the organization?

Of course there is substantial overlap. Guilt is ecumenical.

It's an interesting question.

"Sin" was really a Jewish invention. Other religions have ritual cleanliness and codes of conduct, but if a Buddhist or Taoist or animist does something wrong there is no angry God in the sky who is going to punish her forever. It is so easy for people to differentiate between Christianity, Judaism and Islam as if they are radically different religions but they are not. They are family, and sin and guilt are two of the common elements.

No, it's mormonism.

The essential must have item for every evangelical back in the day was to have a really big car that guzzled the gas, you weren't Southern without a monstrous Crown Vic, or Buick Lasabre, Lincoln or Cadillac (Though Cadillacs were the favorite of the Blacks). It was taboo and Sissy to have a foreign economy car.

For Mormons it was an SUV.

I love it. It's true. Especially the one about Protestants. It's brilliant.

Maybe once society as a whole gets beyond sex. Meaning never.

Sex IS 'tithing' to them. SEX means NUMEROUS tithe payers later on. More Sex = More Money to them.

So, see, it can't get beyond sex because it's all it thinks about. Blanking the members...

It doesn't care about you. All it wants is your MONEY, and your Time, forever. AND your family's time, all the time - and money (most of it). And THEIR Family's ATTENTION, , Thoughts, Feelings...

It doesn't want people to have sex because they might have it all. They might even have a ball. They might roll, or bounce!

It wants to get into your bedroom so it can get into your sacred wild secrets.

Without your privacy, it has nothing. Without your attention/ time/ faith, it has zilch. Without your money, it has nada.

So see, it needs secrets of sacred sex in order to get under your bed and into your head before it's dead.

Without your money, and secrets, mormonism is DEAD. It's dead anyway, but you catch my drift.

P.S.
Spell check, again!
I Fix IT. Hah! It's supposed to fix me... but I'm not the one broken!



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 10/08/2020 05:41AM by ufotofu.

I have added an S to the control word B I T E
S
Behavior
Information
Thought
Emotion


and last but not least sex!
the urge to reproduce is the strongest thing a human has.
Control that you control everything!!!!!!!!!!



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 10/08/2020 06:44PM by thedesertrat1.

Mormonism is based on sex and greed.
That's why Joseph Smith started it, and that's why Brigham Young continued it.

They will never disavow polygamy because that would break the prophet schtick. If you can’t see the emperor’s beautiful clothes, you’re not spiritual enough.

LDS plays into my theory that organizations are anchored to their roots. In this case, Joseph’s testicles.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 10/09/2020 06:34PM by bradley.

They need something to make even the good people feel sinful, unworthy and broken and therefore in need of the church to keep them on the path. The reason they call unauthorized sex the sin next to murder is that almost no one murders but they want you to feel like you're that evil. And in case you're a totally asexual person, and they can't get you feeling sinful because of your biological urges, they also invented the Sin Against the Holy Ghost.

No.

It NEEDS sex.

Caffeine couldn't do it on its own.

INVASION OF PRIVACY

Guilt

DARKNESS