For me it was a glass of champagne with caviar, flowers and a come hither look and I suddenly believed anything, fell for anything . . .
Seduced into it? I wish.
My parents said it was true. The whole town said it was true. Well, the county actually. Who was I to question? Especially in the fifties when all the Mayan and Aztec ruins were still Nephite/Lamanite relics and the Native Americans were all still Jewish. My how things change.
Done & Done Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > My parents said it was true. The whole town said > it was true. Well, the county actually. Who was > I to question? Especially in the fifties when all > the Mayan and Aztec ruins were still > Nephite/Lamanite relics and the Native Americans > were all still Jewish.
Yup. Like a good child, I trusted the grownups. However, there was a moment when I realized the Bible and BoM were supposed to be real rather than just other stories, like fairytales, Santa, etc. Oh. Okay.
But as someone who started having doubts in my early teens, my question for those who were raised in the church and believed it into adulthood, why?
I thought about all that long ago actually--being part of a true believing family. What I realized was that the BoM, Mormonism is only half the equation.
I was born to a TBM family that became such a TBM to the Max family that we were too TBM for the other TBM's in town. Know what I mean?
Six kids. All very different. Very. What each unique personality became in combination with the Mormon indoctrination tied to the BoM is enlightening in light of this question of yours, olderelder.
Oldest--very arrogant over acheiver, doctorate of economics and insists everyone calls him Dr. or Pres., smug even, (some blame the fabled short man's disease) who has been everything up to an MP and an area authorityand now Temple President---his talent is church. His self esteem comes from the same fountain that feeds the G.A.s. There needs to be no consideration as to the veracity of the BoM as the important thing is his standing in the church in the face of any facts. He does not consider the facts ever. Those are what his genes did with Mormonism.
One brother--real sweetheart of a person--- rejected the church by the time he was 13 and claimed the BoM was a joke, ditched seminary, and started smoking and drinking. Quit drinking at 30is after a life that would curl most peoples ears to hear about. Now is so devout and TBM that your head would spin. Again, it's not about the BoM. He needs the church. His genes need the church.
Sister-- Very dry humor and lots of fun, believes but is aware of the issues. Even jokes about them. Married into an equally extreme TBM family. We laugh about everything, even evil laughter, and lines are crossed, but, if you scratch the surface, she believes . . .anyway. Her need to overlook facts would be that doing so would cause chasms in the family.
Youngest sister is like older brother. The church is true for her and Enough Said! Testimony so strong that facts flee when they see it coming. Married the equivalent of the oldest brother. Insufferable. Being the most righteous is critical to her to maintain her status in the family as the favorite (in her mind.)
Younger brother--Jack Mormon. Cant live it but the church is true. I am sure he knows nothing of the BoM --always skipped Seminary--so why shouldn't it be true? He has kept distance from the family. I don't really know him much.
--------
So me? What took me so long? I had a different set of genes. I was so goody goody. I did what I was told. Extreme introvert. Some of that came from knowing I was gay even as young as 7 and knowing hiding it was crucial to survival to hide who I was. So I kept my head down and I did it all including mission where I worked my ass off and was horrified at those who didn't. I did not question. Those were my genes on Mormonism.
I realized the church was a lie in 1973. I knew of no facts or evidence and had no reason to doubt. I was at my third year at BYU surrounded by intense Mormonosity. I had to leave on a gut feeling. I KNEW it was all crap without knowing the facts.
So, I knew the BoM was bull but didn't know the details until I read Know Man Knows My History 38 years later and then found RFM and began excavating all that I had buried--this time with an arheological shovel. Now you can find that damning evidence anywhere anytime, but I had to trust myself way back then. And for all those years in between I had no reason to believe that the Lamanites weren't Jews. I just knew the leaders of the church were A-1 dangerous selfish evil assholes.
Devoted Exmo Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > It never rang true to me or seemed even remotely > plausible.
These are also my feelings. The first pair of Mormon missionaries I met when I was in College and at that time all I knew about Mormons is that they are a religious group who in the past had migrated to the Valley of the Great Salt Lake and used to practice polygamy.
After my first brief conversation with the missionaries, I was in the University library and there looked at a copy of the Book of Mormon. I had only leafed through several pages before concluding that it sounded completely fake to me. By "fake," I mean that I saw much that indicated that it was not an actual history of anything that ever happened in the Americas but was a work of fiction. The frequent use of the phrase, "it came to pass" was also off-putting.
Also SO much evidence (as presented to the reader in the Introduction section of 1970's versions of the BoM and contemporaneous missionary filmstrips).
I claimed to know it was true. But obviously I never actually believed it or I wouldn’t have spent so much time reading scriptures and begging God for a sign that it was true, which of course never came. You end up accepting it because you’ve felt emotional when other people spread their faith-promoting bullshit. But I could never accept God cursing people with dark skin when I knew so many good dark-skinned people and so many evil and arrogant white Mormon assholes.
My temple attending, tithe paying parents never once told me I needed to read it...so I never have. Have learned more about it since I joined here 8 years ago than in the previous 64.
My introduction into the boys club was somewhat subtle in several different ways. First it wasb the almost fake and overfriendly greetings ans gatherings. It was almost as if Mormons were the different people, nobody could be LDS better than the LDS could be LDS. Do you know what I mean? It was born to bear almost a certain atmospheric temperament of entrapping comfort and assurance. Fast forward, most likely now my complex PTSD is simply set off if around overfriendly peeps. You probably get that, you may know what I mean.
Mom was sick, Mom got well, enough said. Church is true! This was never ever ever, said or part of conversation. It was much too sensitive a subject to ever try and maybe consider bringing up. I dont really know if some of that particular aspect was a trait pointing to serious flaws in our family dynamics or just one of the many many cover-up's, flaws, misrepresentations and overt deceptive practices of Mormonism. Anyways, we were perfect bait for the scam, many in the family still are.
In my younger years I was a performer in musical comedies live on stage. So I have no problem in standing before and audience even a church one and loudly proclaiming as per "Elmer Gantry" that which tickles their ears.