For the first half century of my life, I was VERY Mormon. I grew up in an active family. I eagerly did my duties in my Aaronic Priesthood quorums. I served a full time mission. I served in various Stake and Ward callings. I read my scriptures. I prayed. The term “Mormon” defined me more than any other demographic designation.

So when I resigned my membership a few days ago, it should have been a dramatic thing for me, but it wasn’t. When I clicked on “send” I had no more of a reaction than when I paid my electric bill online a few minutes later. I certainly felt no regret, but I also felt no relief. I’m sure my lack of reaction was due to the fact that I mentally and emotionally left the church years ago. My resignation was just a formality.

saying I'd never jump through their hoops. He looked them all up and sent them to me. He was afraid I'd be traumatically impacted by doing it as I am not a very emotionally strong individual. Nope. Nothing. I have just been RELIEVED to not be a mormon and so glad I did it.

I was the devout little mormon, too, though I'm a female so I didn't have to serve a mission and I'm 63 so it wasn't a thing for many girls to go. In fact, the bishop of my parents' ward (I was living at home) kept calling me in and I kept thinking he'd call me on a mission as he had asked others my age in the ward (in fact some a little younger). When I asked him why he hadn't called me, he said that I had my life put together and the other girls didn't. I had a really good job at the time.

He was a bishop who NEVER asked about masturbation. I think I only had one bishop who did that and he was a perv (I was 12 to about 16 when he was bishop). I liked the bishop that didn't call me on a mission.

I didn't have some big celebratory feeling or anything. It was just a feeling of relief.

Congratulations all the same!

It sounds like the feeling I get when I send off my taxes- just relief it's done.

Funny, that's EXACTLY how it feels getting into TSCC/ being baptised (spellcheck suggested 'naked' for baptized), except the programmed "feelings".

Those feelings would be the same upon exiting if people were around you, congratulating you on the truth you have found, saying how glorious your freedom and choices would be....

The feelings come from saying, "NO, I'm not a mormon- sickening!"

Back when I left the church there was no resignation. 1973.

For me the realization that the church was bull was a huge relief because like you, I was Mormon, Mormon, Mormon up to that point.

I floated on air for about half an hour, the greatest relief of my life, sort of shocked because I hadn't seen it coming. And then never felt anything again probably because I was already sick of the meetings and sick of what BYU was which is where I was at the time. And my focus was on being me for a change.

I only finally resigned to make a statement when they did the kids of gays thing. But, when the letter came----it was not like paying a bill as for you, but receiving yet another piece of junk mail.

I remember the days when resignation was not an option. Back in the 80s, I was a Ward Clerk and I took minutes at a Bishop's Court to excommunicate somebody, just because he wanted out. We went trough the entire charade, having one councilor argue for the "defendant" and one argue against. What could either councilor say? At least the nonsense didn't take very long.

I prepared the paperwork and sent it to SLC. It was truly a silly way to deal with the situation, and needlessly insulting to somebody who just wanted out.

Interesting that you were in on that.

The only option then was the Kangaroo Court with the pre-determined verdict. Would that be a Love-aroo Court?

I knew that was the only option but I could have cared less if my name was listed on their rolls. Also, I wasn't ready to get into it with my TBM to the Max family. The down side was every time I moved, which was a lot, there were the missionaries knocking. Didn't really bother me. Finally after Prop 8 got a letter from the ward. Without opening it, my worse half* who was sick of them wrote nasty stuff all over it---really nasty-- finished with Return to Sender and put in the mail. Never heard from anyone again.

You knew, for sometime, that the marriage (i.e. membership) had been over and dead for some while. You had, by degrees and through various circumstances, come to terms with it, and created a different present and a new future.

The time came to sign on the bottom line and make "de jure" what was already "de facto."

Still, I felt absolutely thrilled the minute I realized mormons could no longer consider me a member.

I think everyone has a right to own their feelings, be they elation or ho-hum.

I’ve often heard that the opposite of love isn’t hate, it’s indifference. That’s sometimes true, but often an oversimplification of complex feelings.

I hate TSCC for their lies, their abuse, their devaluation of women, people of color, and LGBT people. On a personal note, I despise what they took from me in time, money, and personal growth.

I suppose that after a decade confronting reality, I had worked through my feelings to a degree that my reaction to my exit was...meh.

CrispingPin Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> On a personal note, I despise what they
> took from me in time, money, and personal growth.


In my opinion it is because resignation isn't personal for them. Excommunication is. They prefer making it personal. They look for people to convert from personal experiences. They make their higher level membership literally a judgment of a person and their personal life.

Resignation is like their polygamic manifesto. It is an impersonal formal separation from what they really want - limited liability control over your personal life.

EB: "...polygamic manifesto"

You have a way with words!

Gosh, say it 5 times fast and it is a tongue twister.