the vacancy left when my wife died from lung cancer.
Most of the ones I have met are "in it for the money"
I realize that this is NOT a "hook up site" I am looking for a friend not a prostitute.

does anybody have any suggestions?
Returning to Mormonism is not viable!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I regularly go to The Bakery cafe near Target in Orem Utah.
appropriate suggestions are welcome

What I have learned from other people's experiences is that one of the best ways to meet possible partners is through volunteer work.

I don't know what kinds of [non-Mormon] volunteer work are available in your area, but I do know that, to a large extent, the people who do volunteer work tend to be good, potential, "partner" material.

Tevai Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> What I have learned from other people's
> experiences is that one of the best ways to meet
> possible partners is through volunteer work.
>
> I don't know what kinds of volunteer work are
> available in your area, but I do know that, to a
> large extent, the people who do volunteer work
> tend to be good, potential, "partner" material.
Thank you That will definitely come under consideration

Great suggestion, Tevai!

Good luck, DR.

Yes, you have to get out and about to run into somebody new. A bit tough in these times but you can find a way.

Good luck DR.

Near you are people who share your interests: gardening, astronomy, reading, cinema, music, fitness...etc.etc. you can find (or make) a group(s) for or about things you'd like to do. Maybe there's an appropriate lady in one!

Edit: I thought it had been deleted or overlooked. Silly me. The site is meetup.com, it's commercial, and it's a way to find groups of people with similar interests as you.

There's also Craigslist.

Hope you can find what we used to call, when I was young, a "meaningful relationship!"



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 01/18/2022 07:43PM by caffiend.

Sometimes employment is a good place to make fr I ends of either sex. Particularly retail. How about a job at walmart?

caffiend Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> n/t



I was always warned not to dip my pen in company ink.

First time hearing about not fishing in the company pond

Yes, because 'pee-ple' -(no people)- know people pee in the company pull, especially those at the top! Sometimes

Get out more!

MAKE OTHERS get out more

Good luck.

*Try personals*

(Don't take this personally)

Are you in one or more of the exmo groups?

Dialoging with other ex-mos is a good way to make new friends. At some point you can get together for coffee.

Is that Ex-mo meet-up group still meeting on Sundays at Harmons? They used to post notices here.

When I was in the area at the end of October, I checked Reddit's 'meet-ups' listing in r/exmormon (it's pinned to the top) and found a group meeting in downtown Provo, at the coffee shop in the lobby of a hotel on Center St.

It wasn't anything I would write home about.  The third person who showed up was an even bigger blow-hard than ME!  And all he wanted to talk about was how the church wasn't true...  That's a drag!

And speaking of 'drag', the meeting was on Halloween, and a young RM showed up in drag-queen drag. It was weird. He was known to many in the group, and everyone complimented him on how good he looked. But I was the only one who asked to have a photo taken with him. A bunch of people took photos of us as we posed together...  What became of them is an interesting question.

The young man was delightful !!  He's a school teacher in one of the little towns, junior high, and I'm sure there are plenty of mormons who would clutch their pearls if they'd seen him that day.

I don't think the very young and the very old have much in common with the majority of the people who attend exmo meetings. Yes, we all agree that the mormon church is not 'true' but there is often wide divergence on how we individually reached that decision.

elderolddog Wrote
> and I'm sure there are plenty of mormons who would
> clutch their pearls if they'd seen him that day.
>

Elderolddog "clutch their pearls"
Love that saying. Scandalous! Was he showing off his porn shoulders?

I dithered between that, and '...had the vapors...'

I finally went with the one that seemed more "Lady Lot"-like.

Hey, I'm the one who introduced both of those phrases to RfM!



https://www.exmormon.org/phorum/search.php?2,search=%22fit+of+the+vapors%22,author=,page=1,match_type=ALL,match_dates=0,match_forum=ALL,match_threads=0

Well, you are the one who lived through the heady 1899 - 1914 time period, ya daft floozy!




Edited cuz sometimes I get too excited. . .

elderolddog Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Well, you are the one who lived through the heady
> 1899 - 1914 time period, ya daft floozy!

Hey, the classics are the classics.

One of my favorites was when I replied to you by saying: "I know 'proper.' I'm a prim and proper lady with blue hair and pearls, much like Jordan."


--------------------
> Edited cuz sometimes I get too excited. . .

All dressed up and nowhere to go? I hate when that happens!

There's a reason the Celestial Room has a fainting couch.

elderolddog Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
>
> ... one that seemed more... >

But NOT A LOT Lady-like
A lady is a lot like a man
But a man can be a Lot MORE
Like a man, when he is a himself
Not NEEDING a wife, though hunting
A Lot of wives, MAYBE, but not Lot's Wife

That's MY LIFE! And My STORY... And I'm Sticking To It.

Since you're asking for advice... Get out of Orem. You are in an area where everybody is polarized, Mormon or ex-Mormon. The situations you describe would be fun to watch but not anywhere to meet a partner. I would try online, can't be any worse than what you are dealing with now. Be open and patient and I think you could find someone.

moehoward Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Since you're asking for advice... Get out of Orem.
> You are in an area where everybody is polarized,
> Mormon or ex-Mormon. The situations you describe
> would be fun to watch but not anywhere to meet a
> partner. I would try online, can't be any worse
> than what you are dealing with now. Be open and
> patient and I think you could find someone.


Right now I can't get out of Orem
I am on a lease with 3 other family members so I am stuck here until at least july.
And YES YES YES the polarization is unbelievable.
I am somewhat obligated to goto sac meeting
lst week the second hour was eliminated because there were not enough teachers show up to hold primary
OH ME OH MY HOW TIME DOES FLY

"Right now I can't get out of Orem"

Have you considered getting a hamster?

I also am looking for a new life partner. I had been married in the Temple, but when I discovered the church's corruption I stopped going. After a while I told my husband I had been reading about church history from literature not published by the church. I explained to him that from the evidence I had read, and the copies of original documents I had obtained, that I didn't see how the church could possibly be True. That didn't go over well.

Long story, short, I am now divorced.
It's difficult to find a man who understands the power religion can have over people.

So, thedesertrat1, I no longer live in Utah. It was a good decision to leave Utah -- I highly recommend moving elsewhere. Utah is too expensive and the Mormon Church has far too much power there.

Tell you what, thedesertrat1, if you join eHarmony and we are compatible, we will be matched up. You can find me there. You'll just have to make certain your search parameters are for all the continental U.S. and for a college-educated woman, and nonsmoker.

I joine eHarmony

i sent you my email
contact me there

I am sorry but all of that verify ets stuff is just crap
If you want to talk or get together just call me
If you only want to play insecurity games I am done here
YOU CHOOSE

I call second dibs!



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 01/20/2022 09:42PM by bradley.

Wow! I thought I was being a nice person and extending some kindness. If we were compatible, we would be matched up and find each other on a relationship website.

Sadly, within 6 hours, it looks like the response is demanding and impatient.

Let’s just conclude that we are not compatible and leave it at that.

That's what I would have concluded too. It was nice of you to reach out.

Hahaha!

Was ‘patriarchal’ on your list of possibilities?



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 01/23/2022 03:46PM by elderolddog.

Good luck with your search, TDR.

Young people all use the dating apps. There are dating apps specifically geared towards senior citizens.

Any good bottle joints around there? Sipping and Sharing Laughs Places, or walking trails, or regular volunteer ops in the area?

ANYTHING you can do around the place? Redecorate? Music? Art? Books? Games, Puzzles/ Conversations?

If you can't do anything inside, headphones?

Try http://kexp.org

It's a non-commercial/ ad-free, 50 yrs, this year, in Seattle, LOTS of great, diverse, new/ different music day and night.

Can/ Do you drive at all?

I have a 34' motorhome for group trips

    

••••••Pistol••••••

Okay Group, get ready. Florida, here we come!

elderolddodonit... okay, but, you know, they also pump the gas. So does the driver. No, they pump the breaks.

Who'zen?

God am it! And Dog On It!

Throw this in google. They list many appropriate places.

senior dating sites

Just be yourself but try to be your better self and just get out there doing things you like to do. People tend to find the right person when they are just living their life not really looking for it.

No one wants to hear this, but I'll say it anyway:

Instead of focusing on finding someone to fill the hole left by he death of a partner, consider changing your focus.

Listen to your heart. Volunteer out of love, doing something that moves you. There's a chance you could meet a woman that way, but that must not be the primary motivation for volunteering.

Also, consider the possibility of having lots of platonic friends whom you love deeply and with whom you share life's journey. It is an option, though many people who've never really experienced platonic love will snicker or diminish it.

Their loss.

The point is, instead trying to replace a person, why not try shifting the focus to a different kind of love and passion.

Maybe you are already thinking that way.

Excellent Advice!

I would say you can't replace them. Paul McCartney couldn't replace Linda. Love needs a certain naivete that you can't go back to any more than you can go back to Mormonism.

Promote yourself as a retired chef.

What woman can resist that ?

Should she exist at all -- and if we think yes, where did we get that idea.
Where did we get the idea of a "soulmate"

thedesertrat1 Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Most of the ones I have met are "in it for the
> money"
===============================

It's not a bug.

It's a survival-adaptive feature of the machine.

Thorough understanding of the origins of this signature removes emotion from the analysis.

It is human to condemn what is, when it does not fit our beliefs on "what should be."
But the real question is where did we get this "what should be."

We have to know the game we are playing -- not the one we wish we were playing.