Mine has been good and bad. But that's people. Sometimes I wish I could have nothing to do with Mormonism and other times I can't imagine what it would be like not to be the ugly duckling surrounded by a bunch of odd ducks. I'm especially proud of my little ducks.

I'll be heading to Utah in about a month for the elder of them to celebrate completing college. This always returning becoming less and less painful as the years pass. On the whole it's been less and less the slow moving train wreck since I derailed from their iron rod going on two decades ago.

For the newly departed from Moroni's people I applaud your future visions unclouded by the first vision. And whatever aperture and appetite you have for seeing beyond the Mormon veil, celestial waiting room, and into the worthiness exit, I hope the mists of darkness are treating you well.

My recovery is going great! Seriously. It has been 20 years since I left and I feel like I'm on a good path. Got the house, car, no other debt than the mortgage. I have a good enough job and time to work on my own projects at home.

Life is better without the parasitic cult. I don't need to give them my money and time anymore. I know that my experience is not like everyone else's and a lot are struggling. I guess I should just keep quiet.

I did loose some of my family members who are still in. My TBM older brother just married for the 3rd time and has not invited me to his last two weddings. Oh well...what can you do? All of my old mormon friends no longer talk with me. Whatever. I've got a bunch of new friends now and I'm fine.

Sounds like a great path. It involves not being manipulated or manipulating others for divinity's sakes!

Since I live in the midst of mormons. The two cities I've lived in for most of my life are Brigham and Hyrum. Isn't that interesting. My neighbors are all mormon. My daughter as everyone knows is TBM. The only LDS of my parents' grand and great grandchildren. My dad was the least of the mormons in our family, but I found out a while back (a year or so) that my dad told my daughter to never quit going to church just after my mother died. If she keeps going all her life, it will be because of that. He was in an emotional state and was hoping I'd go back after our mother died. He found religion as he was getting older. Not when he raised me.

So I can go along and things will be okay for the most part and then something mormon will raise its ugly head and mess me up for a while. I think the thing that has bothered me most lately is my son and his mental health issues. Part of his anger is at the church who he feels stole his twin sister and that she thinks she is better than him. She never says that. She doesn't act so holier than though since she got married. She has a great husband who likes us just as we are. His family does, too.

But as you stated and as most of us know, I think these triggers will be with me the rest of my life. Glad I don't have any temple marriages I stand outside for, BUT even if I raised that child myself and nobody deserved to be at her wedding more than I did, I wouldn't have gone in if they had told me I could. It was harder than I thought it would be and I'm glad it is behind me. Now, if she has children, do I go to the blessings, the baptisms? I probably will. After all, I will not allow them to believe that she is theirs.

Good for you Colleen. You are an inspiration to me.

You are one of my favorite posters so glad to see you weren't gone very long. I always watch for your posts.

I'm impressed by how supportive you've been of your 3 daughters. They are lucky to have you as their dad.

Your kids are lucky to have such a good mother. Mine wasn't good at all.

Here I am over 17 years later. How good can it possibly be?

Tyson

I came a couple years before you. It has gotten so much better for me. I went through all the stages of grief in painfully slow progression and went back and repeated several several times.

Mine is going great, after 21yrs, new wife, new house, great career, plenty of playtime, friends, kids, grandkids, none of whom are Mormon, thank goodness.
Life is good, post religious CULT.

What is wanted?

SC having been a good and faithful Mormon desires to leave and have a much better life beyond the temple.

Let him leave and his wish shall be granted.

I've already saved $60,000 in tithing.

Dang. That is awesome. Recovery had been beneficial.

For me there is an emotional scar that runs deep. It's sort of like a decayed and rotten tooth that has been yanked out. It's no longer there causing pain, but you can occasionally feel its nerve and there's always an empty spot of where it was.

I think some of us will always feel broken and damaged from the church.

I agree. Recovery is a journey not a destination.

Been a bit rough. Lost family, working as a janitor, and the Plague. Still not interested in going back to the Morg, though.

I still went out to sea, which never would have happened had I stayed a TBM in Idaho. I was the first in my family to get a bachelor's degree from a *real* college instead of BYU-I. I finally accepted that I'm bisexual (I'm still not completely out, though. Not sure how well my coworkers would react) and am working out how to date. And this August will mark ten years since I left Mormonism. I figure, the rough recovery journey might make a good story someday.

Fascinating, thank you. Bisexuality and leaving Mormonism is a rough road I travel. It is confusing in until you experience that spark with someone. And if they can totally accept the other orientation it is amazing. Good luck.

As good as could be expected

I don't know what you expect. Talking about your recovery helps I believe. Angry threads are easy. Grieving threads are harder to come by. Acceptance threads are all so different.

I don't know where you are at. I'm at acceptance more and more.

If there is anything I can do to help here on RfM in your recovery let me know.

It is hard to ask for help, so hard that it is embarrassing in a public forum.

And no desert rat I can't find you some companionship.

I think there are many people here who will reply to all sorts of things but their recovery and how it is going.

This article was an inspiration. Sad that we need proximity to really be able to help.

https://www.inc.com/jeff-haden/how-to-instantly-become-more-helpful-thoughtful-kind-backed-by-science.html

Fantastic.

Managed to leave with my Wife & kids a decade ago & although numerous family & best friends are TBMs, we get along fine.

We've largely been left alone by the Morg, bar an occasional newsletter through the post, or new missionaries knocking on our door annually but all things considered it's been relatively easy.

So good not wasting all that time on pointless, time consuming callings & meetings & of course the extra 10% makes life even sweeter.

I salute those that have had it much harder than we have & yet have still chosen to be true to themselves. I appreciate that for many, the decision is often traumatic & involves losing spouses & children along the way. :-(

Indeed. I chose to not let the church have my family without me involved in their lives.

Great to hear about your recovery!

Going great. I'm now a stoner and an alcoholic. I'm very picky about the coffee I drink and I occasionally have to run to the clinic for a penicillin shot because of catching the clap from harlots.

No amateur heathenry here. You've gone pro exmo.

It's a catch 22... The more "recovered" I am, the more absurd the church looks, and the more angry and/ or annoyed I get that I was ever a part of it.

The Borg.

Since I quit "donating" aka paying tithing I have been recovering more and more!
I still have to play a head game or 2 because of my housing arrangements but I am working with that.
I hate the subterfuge but I have to protect myself in the clinches.
I wish I was in a position to resign but for now I just disassociate as much as possible.

It's inside that counts.

I still have a hard time assimilating the fact that DW and two kids believe the bullShiz that is Mormonism. Otherwise, since leaving the church I'm all tickety-boo vis-a-vis recovery from the disease of Mormonism.

What is tickety-boo?

Mine has gone well all things considered.My family knows where I stand and respect my personal space. It's been 6yrs ago for me.I keep a low profile and those who know me well,know I don't put up with bullshit and they don't try to change my position. Crazy since I was HP group leader and Sunday school president in my ward. I was really angry more than anything when I discovered the morg intentionally hid information.

Nice to hear! I totally understand what you are saying. I am in a similar situation.

The anger and the institutional dishonestly drive me crazy from time to time.