i almost banged one sister missionary. where was my companion you may ask? he was in the other room with the other sister helping her look for something she had misplaced. of course we all knew it was bs that they needed help as they had approached us during conferences before for random stuff. we went to their place on the next preparation day anyway

hey, don't look at me. they called us. we were at the office. it was our job to assist other missionaries.

she was very good looking. like one of those hot nuns you see in the movies. think of opening scene of the "californication" tv series type nun. i was like..."sister oh my god i didn't know you looked so good". i couldn't move for a while. i can't remember what she said to me. all i remember was the way she made me feel. i politely removed her arms from around my neck. i simply couldn't do it. i could see the lust in her eyes for this humble servant of the lord. she was game. i was 20. she was 23.

she felt rejected and i felt horrible for that. she called the office a few more times for book of mormon material, random stuff. i pretended that absolutely nothing had ever happened. when she was finishing her mission she gave me her home address (no email back then) and her landline (no cell phones back then either). she wrote me a couple of times after my mission. i never wrote back.

now given half a chance i'd do it. we would have never said anything. sweet baby jesus she wanted me bad and truth be told, i wanted her too but it was forbidden love haha sometimes i think about her and i'm pretty sure she thinks about me too

also with two investigators, and one random mormon girl that kept on insisting on private lessons. all freshman college girls. hot and sexy like you wouldn't believe.

where was my companion? i got paired with a local member while my companion went with someone else. that went on for a few afternoons each month. each time the local member started playing video games while the girl asked for a blessing. in her room, upstairs, early afternoon. everybody else was either at work or school. so it was just me, the girl, and my gamer ward companion downstairs yelling at the tv/game console. those girls orchestrated it well though. credit to them. by the second time i sensed the pattern but i went along. deep down i wanted them too. it's just the feeling of guilt that followed led me to tears although i never did anything. crazy.

moral of the story: hormones are real. i don't judge myself or the girls in a negative way.

i do have another weird story. that was the strangest confession i ever heard from two missionaries. i was supposed to stay with them until the president was ready to talk to them individually. while we waited one of them bursted in tears and told me the craziest story i've ever heard in my whole entire life. a wtf moment even for a kid like myself. but that's for another time

On P-day, we were supposed to halt any good times and resume bringing souls to Christ by 6:00pm. One time we just didn't feel like it. So we didn't. I'm certain that I lost my place in celestial glory for that one.

Unbelievably salacious story, I know.

A friend of mine who served 20 ish years ago told me he had to sleep in the same room as his companion (which I found kind of off putting). Apparently, the companion would..you know..pleasure himself and do so loudly. My friend would be wanting to die of laughter but never said anything. Sheesh, why not in the shower? Hahahaha.

Unfortunately, I didn't sin on my mission. Not even almost. One of the elders had the hots for me and told me so. I was such an obedient goody two shoes I wouldn't dream of breaking the rules.

darth jesus Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> i do have another weird story. that was the
> strangest confession i ever heard from two
> missionaries. i was supposed to stay with them
> until the president was ready to talk to them
> individually. while we waited one of them bursted
> in tears and told me the craziest story i've ever
> heard in my whole entire life. a wtf moment even
> for a kid like myself. but that's for another time

You can't leave us hanging! Tell the story because I have a wild imagination and whatever I imagine will probably be weirder than the story (and I'm hoping the story is beyond my imagination)

This is so sad. Why did you reject someone you where into? I mean I get not doing anything physical at that time, but to never write her after too..I'm curious.

Absolutely sinned.

I was told by both the mission president and stake president that I had wasted the lord's time.

That sounds the opposite of sin. Zero investigator lives ruined is the best possible outcome.

Going on a mission in the first place is the biggest sin.

I did not murder anyone while on my mission.

The same goes for before and after the mission.

Further deponent sayeth not.

@Out and about

i felt guilty. not worthy. there was mutual chemistry but it felt like forbidden love. after my mission i wanted to forget all about it. in my mind it was all a test and i passed and that was all it mattered

after my mission when i figured it was all bs and i went all out with the girls at byu. no regrets. they wanted it, i wanted it, we got it. win win situation. crazy how i went 180 in a few months

Ha! A mission and BYU will teach you a lot. There is a sizable amount of the members who do what they want. They stay in the church for family and social reasons. The girls I slept with at the Y were all from rich families. They didn’t believe but they didn’t want to be cut off from dad’s money. I remember my bishop asking if I had been dating. Ha! Ha!

yup. same here. all upper class girls with daddy issues. as easy as it gets. it was wild for a few years. my only complaint is that they were all blonde. not a single brunette came my way for a change. not one. **sigh** strange world we live in my brother

I had one who wanted to have a real relationship. She was living in a house her dad bought for an investment and it’s the 80’s and the rich kids drive BMW 300 series. The sex was great but there wasn’t much substance beyond that.

I had a fun fling but ended it because there was no substance to it. BYU is an easy place to get laid. They even joke about it on Midnight Mormons. The football team get more ass than a toilet seat. Of course the so called members want a winning team. Well to get that you are going to have to recruit some gladiators who will put a train on your daughter and she will do it because it helps her esteem. They have a total fuck you attitude because they know you are addicted to you team and they take full advantage.

Wake me up when BYU goes after the athletes like they do other people on campus.

Lesson to be learned, if you are young and want to keep all things white. Think about this:

As you run the marathon of life straight through and never take any pit stops, in the end all you get is a plastic trophy and a promise that some kind of reward awaits you. But like a little kid, all they hand you for your reward is a gumball.

For those who took plenty of pit stops along the way, they may have not finished first, but they sure did get the spoils of being late. And the gumball does not matter, its whats behind that big smile that matters.

Sure we all broke rules, but some of us never took pit stops "damn"!

Exactly! Here's to pit stops!

Looking back on a long life now, it's the "sins" that made it worthwhile, and more importantly, those are the parts I actually learned from. They warm me now.

If you want to see the dirty underbelly of the church serve a mission. There be a whole lotta shenanigans going on.

i had a rude awakening. it happened when i worked at the mission office. that's when my first doubts popped in my head. i didn't see anything holy or inspiring. i was in meetings with higher ups like area presidents, bishops, stake presidents. you name it. cold blooded business meetings

the only person that truly behaved and acted like it was a church was my mission president. to this day (although he's long gone from this world) i see him as an example regardless of his faith in the church. i had never seen more honest man, kind, polite, with true love for his fellow human beings. pure class. president, wherever you are, thank you for your example

Define sin.

I masturbated daily pretty much
I ogled the prostitutes we encountered--it was legal
I listened to rock and roll music and the radio
I read the fiction I wanted to and not church books
I slept in
I saw movies at members and investigators houses
I didn't wear the suit on P-Day
I laughed loudly, made fun of the temple and the lord's annointed
I contemplated apostasy
I rarely prayed except for vocal prayers with other people
I fudged my reported hours and even misreported activities

These were all various degrees of wrong doing according to the arbitrary standards of the mission.

I made out with a beautiful Jamaican girl a few times during the last couple months of my mission.

Had I gone on a mission my answer would be a hard yes!

I did not knowingly teach anyone with African ancestry while on my mission.

To do so would have been considered a sin by my church leaders.

Not to do so would have been considered a sin by much of the rest of the world.

Once I decided it was all bs, my real sin was the white and delightsome families I baptized.


Which illustrates the basic problem with calling something a sin. It is very subjective, depending on your god of the moment. For instance, coffee.

Well, I (guess I) was "sinning" already - according to Mormonism - which kept me from getting a missing call at all... Yay! The TRUTH set me free!!

So, I got my wish! FREEDOM from TC!!

The real sin was Mormonism itself!

It's an enemy to God & man, even mankind!

I was on a plane by myself on a transfer and had had enough of the bullshit and was sick and tired of being sick and tired. So when the flight attendant was coming around for beverages, I told her coffee. I had three cups. I'd removed my mission tag.