Recovery Board  : RfM
Recovery from Mormonism (RfM) discussion forum. 
Go to Topic: PreviousNext
Go to: Forum ListMessage ListNew TopicSearchLog In
Posted by: jay ( )
Date: March 25, 2023 05:08PM

Like you were in up to your balls?

In religion?

I hear about the people that were depressed, but anybody that felt primed and pumped and on top of the world like they were living their best possible life and full of power and influence? Heading towards great things in life?

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: elderolddog ( )
Date: March 25, 2023 07:31PM

I've only had one overriding goal in life: to have fun.

During my mission, there were less than a handful of days that I didn't have fun.

The same goes for the entirety of my life, at least from what I can remember of it now ...

Perhaps "fun" is not man's purpose in life, but I'm okay with not knowing it, if that's the case.  Anyone desiring to set me straight regarding the true purpose of life, my email address is easily available.  But be prepared for push-back.

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: Subeamnotlogedin ( )
Date: March 26, 2023 02:10PM

What fun things did you do while on a mission? Did you make out with a sister missionary?

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: elderolddog ( )
Date: March 26, 2023 05:24PM

I provoked and enjoyed laughter; I was always quick with a joke and to light up a smoke, ... to coin a phrase.

I was always trying to find a way to make ANYTHING funny.  (Maybe that's why I IMMEDIATELY hated the temple experience?)

Despite having reached the conclusion that if there was a ghawd, he had ZERO connection with TCOJCOLDS, I had no problem projecting the image of a Justin Belieber.  My first companion in the mission field, my trainer, wrote about me in his memoir of the mission field experience, referring to me as being of Mexican descent and arriving in the mission field projecting a lot of fervor and perhaps too much hilarity and who needed to be dialed back on occasion.  He related that I was much loved by the natives. ("Mormon Passage: A Missionary Chronicle," page 282 [I think...])  There's no indication he was ever aware of the fraud that I was.

I only did what was necessary.  My trainer, Elder 'Pastor,' had a twin in the next-door mission (authors of the above-cited tome), and they were competing with each other.  My Elder Pastor followed all the rules, and we tracted our butts off.  But it was easy because I was happily intrigued by all the new things I was seeing and experiencing.

Both as a junior and senior companion I was blessed with companions who didn't want to do the lord's work.  I counted these pairings as total blessings from a loving ghawd.

During my final size months, Elder Bear and I tracted once in Lagos de Moreno, and Elder Garibay and I tracted never in Colonia Campestre-Churubusco, in D.F.  But you wouldn't know that from the stats listed in the monthly mission magazine.

I did not murder anyone.  Further deponent sayeth not.

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: Lot's Wife ( )
Date: March 26, 2023 05:59PM

Hmm. . .

What's in the other 453 pages?

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: elderolddog ( )
Date: March 26, 2023 08:37PM

The twins are Ph.D.s and have apparently been trying to figure out life and stuff...

You will have noted that they published their missionary memoir in 1998, causing one to wonder what they were doing between 1966 (when they finished their missions) and the 1990s.

I do not recall how I became aware of this bit of their oeuvre, but fortunately, one of my sons was working in the CSU-Long Beach library and he checked out a copy for me to peruse.

I quickly found the parts where I was mentioned...and those are the only parts of the book I read.  I later learned that because he'd been unable to locate me, he was forced to use a pseudonym rather than my real name.  

The particular page where I'm introduced to the readers was at one point visible online, and I recall being described along the lines of happy-go-lucky and, at times needing to be "dialed back..."  As if!!!  

Since this was back in the days of AOL, I can't review the emails Elder Pastor and I exchanged at that time, other than that his mention that attempts to find me had failed.  I did not rub his face in my non-belief, neither in the present nor the past.

No doubt the other 400+ pages recount a bit about their lives there in SLC, just prior to putting in their papers and then getting their calls, and then their pious mission activity.  I would call it a F&TM diary of their missions.

I don't recall Elder Pastor mentioning anything about all the movies we went to, nor the frequent trips to Sanborns Restaurant...  

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: Lot's Wife ( )
Date: March 26, 2023 08:44PM

Well, dadgumit, I'm sold. Imma go right out to my neighborhood bookstore and purchase a copy.

Please make sure your royalty. As Mr. Burns often said, make sure they "give the boy a nickel!"

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: Phantom Shadow ( )
Date: March 27, 2023 12:08AM

Ha! Elder Old doggie. My DH was a lot like you. Rules? Well, maybe. Hung out with members a lot and learned Spanish from them. Very successful, in the mission presidency at end. Made a good impression on me. I married him.

Now as to the twins. I read their memoir of growing up in SLC. Their older brother was in my high school class, They were two years behind me. Met one them at my high school reunion last summer. Had a nice talk with him and introduced him to DH, who wants to write his own memoir. He came to represent his older brother. Too bad I didn't know your story then.

Now I'm going to buy their mission memoir.

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: elderolddog ( )
Date: March 27, 2023 12:49AM

Was it your 60th HS reunion?   If so, that's weird, because my 60th reunion was planned for last September!  Class of '62...

Gary was the twin who was my first Senior Companion.  You'll read his complaints about remaining a junior companion way longer than Gordon.  I was his second junior companion.  He did make AP; four of my companions, at least, made AP.  I'm such a good influence!

About two months after he was released, a rumor hit us there in the mission field that he and Gordon had stood up in a Stake Conference and announced that the church was a bunch of hooey, and they were done with it.

In 1998, after I found out about the mission memoir and got in touch with him via email, I asked him about that rumor.  His response was that it wasn't true.  But there was no expansion on the theme.

Did you form any impression as to any fealty with the church?  ...not that they ever really give back!

If your hubby could use a fearless (but kind) proof-reader for feedback, I'm here for you guys.

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: Lot's Wife ( )
Date: March 27, 2023 02:32AM

There are times when I wonder if there is anyone you don't know, Jesus.

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: jay ( )
Date: March 27, 2023 10:09PM

“I was always trying to find a way to make ANYTHING funny.“

It really is amazing to see you at work because you’re able to do just that. I am always amazed at how quick witted you are and how you can turn anything into something funny.

I think you must have a team of writers ready to pounce on the latest post.

Am I wrong to conclude really funny people are also really smart?

Anyways, you are entertaining and definitely provoke a lot of laughter on my end.

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: elderolddog ( )
Date: March 28, 2023 12:20AM

> Am I wrong to conclude
> really funny people are
> also really smart?

Yes, you are wrong to reach that conclusion.

Maybe some really smart people can be funny, but I am not one of them.  Just ask The Cat and he will assure you that I am not a smart person, and I agree with him. 

I am a seriously mentally-pretzeled person with an above-average IQ.  How that has worked out for me in life has been ... funny.

Mission accomplished!

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: Boyd KKK ( )
Date: March 26, 2023 08:42PM

elderolddog Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I've only had one overriding goal in life: to have
> fun.
>
> During my mission, there were less than a handful
> of days that I didn't have fun.
>
> The same goes for the entirety of my life, at
> least from what I can remember of it now ...
>
> Perhaps "fun" is not man's purpose in life, but
> I'm okay with not knowing it, if that's the
> case.  Anyone desiring to set me straight
> regarding the true purpose of life, my email
> address is easily available.  But be prepared
> for push-back.

"Men are that they might have Joy" - so I came home and looked for a girlfriend with that name...

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: elderolddog ( )
Date: March 26, 2023 09:09PM

Boyd KKK Wrote:
--------------------------
>
> "Men are that they might
> have Joy" - so I came home
> and looked for a > girl-
> friend with that name...
>


Don't keep us hanging!!!  Did you find her?

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: Silence is Golden ( )
Date: March 26, 2023 12:45AM

From what I was indocrinated with versus what I experienced were two different worlds. I was expecting a Ferrari and got a Yugo.

My mission was boring and we were always looking for something to occupy our time. Knocking on doors did not work, and contrary to what we were told, the members tolerated us. On my mission I went water sking, bowling, basketball, bike rides just to occupy us, and we did lots of sight seeing. People were simply not interested, and to be honest I was not interested in convincing them that Mormonism was the one and only.

Elders were lazy, and we always turned in numbers to keep the misson office happy. Talks avoiding sex, masturbation, and keeping arms length from sister missionaries was the norm. Bishops, SP, and the Mission Pres. were obsessed with talking about keeping yourself pure. You found sanity among the non-mormons. I just wanted to go home, but knew if I did then my mother would have disowned me.

If I had to do it all over again, I would have bought a bus ticket, left at midnight while my companion slept, and headed to another state. Aquire employment, enroll in school, and send a postcard to my parents telling them I was fine. One Elder in our group found a way home, his anxiety was so intense he threw up all the time, and lost weight big time. So they sent him home, and he never came back. But his symptoms vanished once home.

People who say their mission was the best two years of their life.....need to get a life.

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: Brother Of Jerry ( )
Date: March 26, 2023 09:54AM

There is a reason that returned missionaries having nightmares, often for years after, about somehow ending up on a mission again, is a thing.

Options: ReplyQuote
Posted by: tensolator ( )
Date: March 26, 2023 08:55PM

Like you were in up to your balls?

Only when I had a death grip on my Weiner.

Options: ReplyQuote
Go to Topic: PreviousNext
Go to: Forum ListMessage ListNew TopicSearchLog In


Screen Name: 
Your Email (optional): 
Subject: 
Spam prevention:
Please, enter the code that you see below in the input field. This is for blocking bots that try to post this form automatically.
       **  ********  ********   ********  ******** 
       **     **     **     **  **        **    ** 
       **     **     **     **  **            **   
       **     **     **     **  ******       **    
 **    **     **     **     **  **          **     
 **    **     **     **     **  **          **     
  ******      **     ********   ********    **