Today I was reminiscing with a cousin about one of my great aunts.

We realized if she was alive, we'd be at her house "turning" homemade fruitcake.

These were not the dry commercial grade cakes of today. Hers were moist, filled with apricots, peaches, apples, currants, walnuts and cherries all from her farm and orchards.

The dark molasses cake was loving bathed in homemade brandy.

They were wrapped in cheesecloth and made well in advance of thanksgiving.

Every so often she'd turn them and baste them in brandy.

The last time I helped her was a sad event as we used the last of the brandy my grandfather had made before his passing.

At the end we had just enough brand to share and reminisce about those that went before us.

She passed a year later.

About a year after she passed I found myself eating my first C Ration. Canned military food.

To my surprise I really enjoyed the canned fruit cake. I readily traded for it and eventually accumulated several spare cans.

Fast forward a few months, a few of us mormons had gathered for sacrament meeting in a corner of a field.

We then realized no one had saved any crackers (we didn't have bread available) so after a few minutes of deliberation it was decided to use one of my cans of fruit cake. After all, D&C states it matters not what you use as long as you do it with an eye single to the Lord's glory.

No we didn't say bless this fruit cake, we just said bless this cake.

A few years later we did use Kool Aid, but said bless this drink.

Anyway, anybody else use odd or unusual food/drink for the sacrament?

Anyone else have a favorite ration?

My mom made fruitcake old style with cheesecloth and brandy a few times when I was little. She explained the alcohol was for flavor only (whatever). It was a lot of work, and good as far as fruitcake goes. No one seemed to like it very much though.

My mom mentioned C rations but I never knew much about them.

I've been meaning to try and make her fruitcake again so the knowledge wouldn't die. I don't think it's going to happen. My kids don't seem interested either.

I make a loaf sometimes that has cherries and chocolate chips in a fruitcake kind of batter. That's probably as close as I'll get.

  
  

Oh no....I feel more reminiscing coming on...

For some reason, Wonder Bread seemed like Play-Doh to me. I always had to mash up a blob of it and shape it into a ball or cube. I'd even do it with sacrament bread. Of course the deacons had already mauled it.

Now I buy Wonder Bread when my grandkids are staying with me. We get out cookie cutters and make fancy sandwich shapes.

Wonder Bread. . .

Isn't that from back when it was legal to sell cigarettes to children?

In Seattle, teens would sneak to press the button enabling the cigarette machine at restaurants when no employee was watching/ nearby so that cig sales machines accepted $ & dispense cigs;

Naive me, I never smoked more than 1 or 2 my entire life; pretty much the same for coffee, so Mormonism made sense to me in those tender years...

I think she found a proper use for it. Vile stuff.

Yep. Not real bread by any stretch of the imagination. Play-Doh is closer to the truth.

D'oh!

Now you have done it Dagny! I am going to have to get me some Wonder Bread. I don't think I have had it for 30+ years. Does it still taste the same? And the trick for correct Wonder Balls is you must only use the white not the crust or they don't mush correctly.

We are big nerds and we love this series. I think this will take you to the Wonder Bread episode.

https://www.history.com/shows/the-food-that-built-america/season-3/episode-5

If you are going to buy a loaf of Wonder Bread, you should probably purchase some insulin to go with it.

Meh, every 30 years I am willing to risk it. I live on the wild side :)

Haha!

First time I tasted it I wondered if it really was bread.

You're lucky. Other than Susan, few have lived to tell the tale.

Dagny likes it too! I added it to cart and when I get it I will return and report lol.

I had some USAF C rations. They were good. Only difference was US Army rations came with cigarettes, USAF rations didn't, as the ones I bought were intended for in flight use, in prop planes so powered by aviation fuel.

Graham crackers at scout camp. They really weren't crumbled but split into rectangles at the perforated marks. They were so big that many of us took almost 5 minutes to chew and swallow it up. Brother Hack, the I didn't want this calling scoutmaster, grew impatient waiting for us to swallow them. Though it was water from a canteen, we had full size Styrofoam cups to wash down the crackers.

The stake president wanted no more Saturday hike ins for Scout camp. He was livid that we were "camping" on Sunday. The following year we drove up on Monday morning at 3:30 so we could hike in at dark and try to unpack before the 7 am breakfast call. This was a normal non-Mormon scout camp and most troops had driven up around noon on Sunday to stake out the best campsites for the week long event.

Arriving Monday morning put our scout troop at the very bottom of scout camp duties. There were only two campsites left. One to the left of the garbage transfer station and one to the right of the trash dumpsters. We dealt with awful smells, flies and bumble bees all week long. That's why I had sadistic fantasies of tying up the stake president and tossing him into the dumpster for a day. It was my worst experience at a scout camp.

We had the same issue.

To solve this, our Scout Master dumped the BSA camps and took us deep into the wilds just off the Snake River in Idaho near his cabin.

Since we arrived on a Saturday, then the deal was we had to do church stuff on Sunday per the Bishop. So the local Chapel up there served an entire rural community that was spread out. Attendance was over 1,000 people, it took place is this big lodge they used on Sunday. So once a year, the local EQ & HP got a break and all us Scouts passed the sacrament, since there was nary a Deacon, Teacher, or Priest to be found.
On a secondary story.

Dad would receive all kinds of gifts at Christmas from the pharmaceutical companies hoping he would prescribe their medications over others. Amongst those gifts it was a sure bet that a Fruit Cake or two was delivered. One year Dad took a particular liking to one Fruit Cake that arrived. At the age of 14 or so I watched him consume the cake over a period of two or three days. We kids never touched the things. As I was sitting in the kitchen watching Dad finishing the last slice, my mother came around the corner and chastised him. Barking in her unique way she told him that cake had been soaked in Brandy. Dad looked at the last bite and said, "That explains why it is so good!" He then ate that last bite. Mom stomped out of the kitchen. He gave me a sly smile as she went out of sight.

> Mom stomped out of the
> kitchen.  He gave me a
> sly smile as she went
> out of sight.


Why would we have experiences like this in mortality if no such things could happen in the Celestial Kingdom?

And if no such things could occur in the CK, why the hell would I want to live there?

Great story about the fruit cake.

One about rum balls.

Company sent a group of us to an out of the area symposium. One of the older ladies in the group brought a giant box of holiday rum balls. No, I don't think anyone became drunk but let's just say that their table began feeling happier and happier as the day progressed. I wasn't a prude and had a few myself, but they were really drenched with rum. And it was a fun day because their answers became sillier and sillier while in the happy mode.

As a teacher age young man (14), I went on a Hawaiian vacation with my cousin and grandmother. Both of my relatives were non-members. My grandma would order a cocktail in the evening when we attended a luau. Just about every large hotel and resort sponsored one at their facilities every other day. In addition to evening entertainment, they would lay out a giant buffet including several punchbowls. I was very cognizant about paying attention about drinking non-spiked fruit punch.

My cousin resented my goody-two-shoes Mormon attitude so he set me up. He went over to the punch table and did the switch-aroo of signs (fruit punch and fruit punch with rum). My cousin went one step further by bringing me a cup of spiked punch. I could tell that the punch tasted "funny". I didn't become drunk, but my cousin came close. A hotel security stopped us when we exited the luau. I thought we were busted for underage drinking, but it was hotel policy that patrons couldn't exit with open drink containers. We had to finish our drinks in our hands.

I had an interesting experience in the lovely city of Rio de Janiero many decades ago.

There was the largest candy store I had ever seen. Candy from all around the world. I couldn't make up my mind.

The I saw a box labeled Napoleons.

So being young I assumed that was chocolate, strawberry and vanilla.

Bought the box, got home and, well it was an odd tasting candy, definitely not chocolate, strawberry and vanilla but I slept well if I had four or so before bed.

After several months of buying these, I asked a friend why the Brazilians Napoleon candy wasn't chocolate, strawberry and vanilla.

He asked if I meant Neapolitan? Then explained Napoleons contained brandy.

We ate MREs for three months. Since we were working with Muslims they got all the non pork MREs. We got the pork ones. I got so tired of eating pig out of a Mylar pouch cooked by shoving it down the stack of a diesel engine and gunning the engine to pop the pack out. We never used the heater bags. They were too much trouble and slow.

Every time I see this topic heading, I assume it's about Gladys or the Rainbow AP . . .

You again?

Aren't there golf balls nearby that need to be sliced?

Ate a lot of canned military rations, C or K - don't remember which - growing up in a military family. We got them and loved the beef, fruitcake and especially the old chocolate bars. They were crumbly & off color from age but sure did taste good. Yes, the food packs did have cigarettes in them. This was stuff from WWII and the Korean War. Yep, I'm getting old.

Before going out on a mission, the boxes would be opened and turned upside down, so you couldn't identify the better ones. What you grabbed is what you ate, like it or not. A few were especially nasty: ham & eggs (looked and tasted like canned dog food), pork & rice, and the worst: Ham and lima beans, nicknamed "ham and mother-------s." In gooey syrup.

I'd draw those, like we all did, but also got the better beans & franks, spaghetti & (meat) balls, etc.

Marine grunt: "Hey, trade you my Ham & mothers for that beans & franks?"
Marine Caffiend: "Throw in the ham & eggs and a few coffees, you got a deal."
Marine grunt: "Heck, I'd probably chuck in the jungle anyway."

Five days later: Everybody's out of food, except Caffiend who's got plenty of calories in his knapsack.

Getting back on thread:
We had an LDS lieutenant, who had never had chocolate. He must have been a hard-boiled believer. We introduced him to "battlefield birthday cake," the fruitcake with a chocolate icing made from the cocoa envelope, instant coffee, sugar and cremora-like creamer. He loved it! And was soon trading some of his stuff for more cocoa and instant coffee envelopes.
My little contribution to LDS apostasy.

caffiend Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Before going out on a mission, . . .

You went on a mission too? I had no idea!

We called them "operations." Nowadays, the term is likely to be (military) "mission."

But just think: what if missionaries were given boxes of C-Rations to subsist on? Recruitment, I mean, "calls" would plummet, but those who undertake a mission would become really hardened dudes.

I’ll be baking our Christmas cake this weekend! And I’ll be pouring 2 tablespoons of brandy over it when it’s still warm from the oven and then every two weeks, until I marzipan and ice it the week before Christmas.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 10/27/2023 02:25PM by Claire Ferguson Benson.

Wow, thanks! That picture and your description sounds very much like my grandmother's process with the brandy.

I do suspect, like Steve, that there might really only be a few actual fruitcakes being re-gifted in perpetuity.

Happy cooking! It's great to see you drop in. I hope all is well for you.