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Posted by: subeamnotlogedin ( )
Date: December 01, 2023 08:48AM

Now this is stand up comedy about Provo Utah. Lol it is probably not true but who knows?

https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZPRvgkwq5/

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Posted by: subeamnotlogedin ( )
Date: December 01, 2023 08:56AM


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Posted by: fritz ( )
Date: December 04, 2023 01:12PM

I like the typo "public hair" in the yahoo text.

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Posted by: Dave the Atheist ( )
Date: December 01, 2023 10:43AM

Gotta keep those armpits shaved.

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Posted by: summer ( )
Date: December 01, 2023 12:19PM

I think that's more information than I wanted to know. lol

I still don't get the rationale behind soaking. To me, soaking is sex -- uninteresting sex, but whatever. Plus, it can definitely result in pregnancy.

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Posted by: subeamnotlogedin ( )
Date: December 01, 2023 01:37PM

Summer the Mormon God allows entrance without thrusting or thrusting inside the armpits but the Mormon God does not allow sex outside marriage. Oh I forgot the Mormon God also only allows marriage between a man and a woman. Hahaha the non Mormon population of the world must think this is nuts.

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Posted by: subeamnotlogedin ( )
Date: December 01, 2023 01:41PM

Oh I forgot masturbation is also a sin so I guess the armpit keeps it righteous because no hands are being used. During a temple recommend if the question is "do you keep the law of chastity?" the bishop did not ask anything about my armpits lol.

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Posted by: swallow ( )
Date: January 24, 2024 04:34AM

Make sure you don't get crabs on your hairy hobbit feet.

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Posted by: subeamnotlogedin ( )
Date: December 01, 2023 02:27PM

Now there are "gazing" parties.

https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZPRvgQbWR/

This is too much.

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Posted by: dagny ( )
Date: December 01, 2023 07:30PM

Wow, that's seriously dumb. They try so hard not to be TOO naughty.

Imagine if you were the only one who actually did remove clothes and everyone else was bluffing.

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Posted by: elderolddog ( )
Date: December 04, 2023 01:30PM

Then you'd have another label added to the list that people used to define you; you'd either be a bluffer or a buffer...

I honestly think that for me, it would be who was at the party...

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Posted by: Livid ( )
Date: January 23, 2024 05:01PM

dagny Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Wow, that's seriously dumb. They try so hard not
> to be TOO naughty.
>
> Imagine if you were the only one who actually did
> remove clothes and everyone else was bluffing.

Or the only one to keep them on.

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Posted by: summer ( )
Date: December 01, 2023 07:46PM

Kids! Always getting up to shenanigans.

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Posted by: Heartless ( )
Date: December 01, 2023 07:10PM

Albert Carrington, apostle and members of the first presidency, prophet, seer and revelator stood trial before the 12 for adultery.

His defense....since he did not fully penetrate, nor ejaculate during his "follies" it was technically not adultery.

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Posted by: Lot's Wife ( )
Date: December 01, 2023 07:19PM

Never heard of the man before, so I looked him up.

The question you didn't answer was what happened to him. In the event he was excommunicated, spent two years in the wilderness, and was then rebaptized although not reinstated as an apostle.

Two years! Imagine that! You've had your calling and election made sure, have years of adulterous relationships, and are back in the church after only two years!

Seems pretty light to me. . . but then again, it was only "soaking."

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Posted by: Subeamnotlogedin ( )
Date: January 25, 2024 12:13PM

Lot's Wife Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------

>
> Two years! Imagine that! You've had your calling
> and election made sure, have years of adulterous
> relationships, and are back in the church after
> only two years!
>
> Seems pretty light to me. . . but then again, it
> was only "soaking."


I have noticed that the punishments are not equal. How can god who is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow be so easy going with some people and brutally to others? Even after a pedophile in Germany went to prison the high council didn’t want to excommunicate the pedophile it was the year 2014. Eventually he did get excommmunicted. My aunt who got pregnant at age 19 out of wedlock at BYU Provo she got excommunicated right away the RM who got her pregnant nothing happened to him not even disfollowshiped. Why? Because my aunt had seduced him. Nope it takes two to tango.

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Posted by: Lot's Wife ( )
Date: December 01, 2023 10:39PM

Wait—I thought this thread was about EOD.

My bad!

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Posted by: elderolddog ( )
Date: December 01, 2023 11:06PM

Stop fantasizing!

You're making me blush...

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Posted by: Lot's Wife ( )
Date: December 02, 2023 12:59AM

You should have a doctor look at that "blush."

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Posted by: subeamnotlogedin ( )
Date: December 02, 2023 12:19PM

I haven't tried the armpit thing but what does the woman get out of it? Also the man must have had crabs to give it to her armpit. First the man has real sex and gets crab and after that uses the armpit of a Provo virgin and gives her armpit crabs? Poor virgin gets an STD in her armpit.

Well Joseph Smith was commanded to do polygamy by an angel with a flaming sword.

EOD do I dare to ask about BYU stories about loopholes with the law of chastity?

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Posted by: elderolddog ( )
Date: December 04, 2023 02:12PM

I had what I believe was a very typical mormon upbringing for that era, but it had one significant divergence, in that I wasn't in the heart of the morridor, where when puberty raised its helmeted head, 90% of your high school student body was also mormon.  My estimate is 15% mormon in my high school.

One thing I did note as a pre-mission, mostly pubescent, 1950s-1960s teen was that the mormon girls I dated were a lot randier, and it wasn't even close!  I had dates with four non-mormon girls and never once tried to go past first base.

As good mormon boys, we "knew" that in "running the bases" (a baseball analogy in which 1st base was kissing [no tongue], 2nd base was french-kissing and boob-fondling, 3rd base was the famous one-handed bra removal (a lost art), dry-humping, with frothing at the mouth and crotch, and crossing home plate was full on sex), that if you didn't hit it out of the park, you both remained chaste; no gum was chewed...unwrapped, maybe, but not chewed.

(As for the other analogy, the 2"x4" with a nail hole, no nails were used during the pounding...)

It was my experience as a high school virgin that mormon girls were "easy"; 2nd base was acceptable, and I even had one Laurel (Judy C.) who 'forced' me on herself...  Oh, the agony!

"Gum" remained unchewed as long as there was no textbook sex.  I don't know what would have been the results if we'd known about 'soaking.'  I've never conducted a survey, but I never met a mormon girl who considered dry-humping had robbed them of their chastity.

I had one weird experience at the Y. I had two dates with a Canadian girl named Wendy (No, it wasn't that Wendy, and believe me, I checked with Google...), both of which ended with vigorous dry-humping.

The first time, when I drove her back to her apartment, she said that we shouldn't have gone so far, and she asked that we pray for strength.  I, staring at her bosom in post-coital bliss, readily agreed.

We went out a second time, ostensibly just to get some ice cream, and again ended up occupying the entire front seat, clothedly pounding away, with her just as eager and thrusting as me...  

And then, when I dropped her off at her place, she again wanted to pray for forgiveness and strength.  I considered that to be hypocrisy of the worst kind, and I wasn't going to hang out with someone so unprincipled!!

One observation regarding RMs and a BYU marriage:  An RM at the Y (I can't speak to other situations) can't be certain who is in charge of agreeing to get married, the brain or the reproductive system.

I think there is a huge gap between my generation and even the kids born in the 80s, with the difference that exists now being basically unimaginable.  Were we hypocrites while the youth of today are open and honest?  

Not that it matters; the earth's population continues to grow, so nature doesn't seem to care.

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Posted by: Alien Weaponry ( )
Date: January 27, 2024 06:30AM

elderolddog Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
>  Were we hypocrites while the
> youth of today are open and honest?  

They're just as hypocritical as you were but in diffeent ways. I think they will regret the way they've been manipulated in the near future.

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Posted by: cludgie ( )
Date: December 03, 2023 09:32PM

We talking soft crabs?

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Posted by: messygoop ( )
Date: December 04, 2023 03:10PM


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Posted by: Rubicon ( )
Date: December 05, 2023 02:21PM

Girls didn’t have hairy armpits when I was at BYU.

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Posted by: elderolddog ( )
Date: December 05, 2023 02:47PM

  
  

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Posted by: GNPE ( )
Date: December 05, 2023 03:17PM

I'm feeling somewhat left out bc I don't have any Crabs, armpit or otherwise...

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Posted by: Anone ( )
Date: December 06, 2023 04:31AM

GNPE Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I'm feeling somewhat left out bc I don't have any
> Crabs, armpit or otherwise...

That can be arranged. There used to be a website selling them online.

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