For those of you who don’t know, the LTM was the Language Training Mission. It preceded the MTC (the MTC opened a week or two after I departed for the mission field).

Recently, I got in touch with a friend from my mission with whom I hadn’t spoken in many years. I was delighted to hear that he (like me) had not only given up on the Mormon church, he had formally resigned his membership. We’ve had a couple of conversations where we shake our heads thinking about our former beliefs. One area where we have both significantly evolved is with our feelings about LGBTQ people. My friend has a daughter who is bisexual, and we have both had many friends and coworkers who are gay, bi, or otherwise not “traditional.”

A couple of days ago, we had a lengthy “do you know whatever happened to…” conversation. There are very few people from my mission that I know anything about their current situation, but we were both aware of some situations. A few of our former fellow missionaries have died, some have obviously moved on from the TSCC, and some are still devout. He asked me “Did you hear about Elder XXXXXX, your LTM teacher”? I was very fond of this particular teacher, but I hadn’t heard anything about him for decades. He told me that this former LTM teacher was gay, but that he tried to follow the Mormon way. He got married in the temple and had a couple of kids, but eventually came to terms with his sexual orientation. To say that his family, and the church, were not supportive would be an understatement. He was cut off from his kids and was ostracized. Eventually, he took his own life.

I know that suicidality among LBGTQ Mormons is way too common, but it sad to hear about it about somebody I liked and admired. If there is an afterlife, I hope he’s found peace.

Again, I can opine that the NEED to belong overcame the desire to be authentic.

Growing up can also mean growing away.

I wonder if we had the same LTM teacher. I swear mine was gay. So nice. Handsome. I told him I thought I might be. Knew damn well I was since about age 7. He assured me I wasn't. Perhaps assured himself as well. That doesn't work. I know too many suicides and too many shattered wives. We need a do-over sans Mormonism.

Isn't what Mormonism does to people over this issue, both men and women, the epitome of cruelty?

For me this is probably the church's greatest sin.

That's truly awful. If there is an afterlife, then I hope he has found peace. He surely did not get any from the Mormon church.