Because he wanted quickies more often without disrobing. An open crotch gave Joseph quick access. He and any "wife" could have intercourse behind any door and in any barn without being caught. His hand could easily make a move up a skirt without any barrier. Joseph learned his lesson with Fanny Alger in the barn.
He needed something more covert.
The covert wife just has to lift up her dress a little and Joseph is ready to go.

Covenant path or covert path?....hahaha..... whatever.

The open crotch was so that women could relieve themselves without having to take off layers of clothing.

Joseph knew if a woman had garments she would be quickly available for sex. Joseph would never think of a woman's excretion needs first.
He could have made them two piece from the beginning but he didn't.

One of his fantasies--crotchless underwear.
Probably got the idea from a risqué European painting.
LOL

Then there was the "flare leg" model for women. The leg hole was so huge that one could put it aside to go #1.

My mom had some of these prior to the two pieces. As a young girl I was horrified by the flair leg style.

am I alone in thinking I'd end up peeing all over my garments in that scenario? Am I the lone sloppy pee-er?

Crone has the "Occam's Razor" answer, the rest of y'all aren't listening, and are being too clever by half.

So why did JS want underwear with an open butt-flap for men?

Well... He was full of gas... and it came to pass...

Lol

I wish my eyes could blank out these words and my brain this image. Just ewwwwwwwwwww.

I. KNOW.

Oh Jesus, I remember the buttoned bum flap underwear. It could have been worse, could have been a zipper.

Well, to be fair, everyone had open crotch or drop-bottom underwear back in 'em days.

Why wear open crotch when you can just go commando.

1)  Open crotch

2)  Insert priesthood

3)  Repeat for eternity




Pardon my fascination with reproduction...

I'm sure it's hearsay, but I've heard about a lab rat experiment where they wired a rat's 'pleasure center' so that when a lever was pressed, the 'pleasure center' got a nice jolt.

The rat was then introduced into a cage with two 'levers.'  One lever, when pressed, allowed a moist, chewy nugget of excellent rat food to roll out.

The other lever, when pressed, delivered a wonderful jolt of joy to the rat's pleasure center.

In the story, the rat was said to have starved to death . . .

Do the story's rat and the ghawd of mankind share anything in common?  Did JoJu believe that sexual climax was the be-all and end-all of existence?


Did evolution do too good a job regarding Homo Sapien Sapien's urge to reproduce?



Pardon my fascination with reproduction...

I'm sure it's hearsay, but I've heard about a lab rat experiment where they wired a rat's 'pleasure center' so that if a lever was pressed, the 'pleasure center' got a nice jolt.

The rat was then introduced into a cage with two 'levers.'  One lever, when pressed, allowed a moist, chewy nugget of excellent rat food to roll out.

The other lever, when pressed, delivered a wonderful jolt of joy to the rat's pleasure center.

In the story, the rat starved to death ...


Do the story's rat and the ghawd of mankind share anything in common?  Did JoJu believe that sexual climax was the be-all and end-all of existence?  




edited to edit ...



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 03/31/2024 09:03PM by elderolddog.

An editor, an editor! My kingdom for an editor!



Edited to "D'oh!"



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 03/31/2024 10:19PM by Lot's Wife.

It was so if he came to a bridge he could jump off the wagon or horse and Whiz in the air!

Did the garment nonesense even start with Joseph? He becomes a Mason and comes up with his own Mason inspired endowment and he shows a rough version of it to some of the church leaders and gets killed.

Then Brigham Young starts doing endowments in the Nauvoo temple. We know these were done on the top floor using canvas partitions.

This evolved and continued in Utah.

None of the other splinter groups wear garments. If Joseph Smith was behind it you would think some of the other groups would have a garment tradition.

Probably for the simple reason that they were one pieces and urination and defecation are difficult otherwise. That's before the sex stuff.

If only we Exs had an alternate conference meeting, this could be on the agenda…

Never Mind.

Sorry, but back in his day, ALL underwear had either an open crotch or drop-bottom. And the probably stank to high-high heaven.