In a discussion about the recent budget cuts in our ward, I mentioned that attendance was way down because no one likes Bishop Jackwagon. He's a arrogant, sarcastic bully who orders people around and has to have his way. He demands obedience. People are fed up with it and finding excuses to go to other wards or stay home entirely. TBM SIL (not the one getting married in Aug - an older one) told me that she thought the people of my ward needed to humble themselves and get back to church and accept that the bishop was called of God. Apparently, she feels that if you don't bend over and take whatever abuse that the bishop heaps on you, then you are full of pride and need to humble yourself and learn to take it. I wish I could have thought of the following response while still on the phone with her.

"Molly, you now live in state with few Mormons where the church isn't as well known as it is in California. You are also a school teacher. If you saw one of your fellow teachers picking on a student just because he was Mormon, what would you do? If the teacher was nasty to this student, always making him feel inadequate, always talking down to him...would you just blow it off? If you knew for sure it was because the kid was Mormon, would you tell the kid he needed to humble himself before that teacher because the teacher was an authority figure and get himself back to class? No? Well, why should I?"

"Why should I watch people being abused because they are Mormon and think there is some virtue in it? If the people in our ward weren't Mormon, they wouldn't be picked on by a Mormon bishop. Would you tell a Catholic school boy who was the victim of a pedophile priest to humble himself and get back to church WHERE THAT SAME PRIEST STILL PRESIDES? Emotional and spiritual abuse are also ABUSE. Why is being able to be treated badly just because I'm Mormon a virtue when the truth is, the abuser is wrong? What gives the bishop the right to behave in a way that disgraces his priesthood, disgraces the LDS church and hurts God's children...and why should I have to stand by and put up with it? That's not humility. That is participating passively in abuse and allowing someone who claims to represent Christ to disgrace his teachings and his position of authority in his church... and get away with it. It's no different that a mother who allows her husband to beat her children. She's a passive partner in the abuse because she allows it - she doesn't do anything to get out of the situation. Knuckling under to bullies isn't humility and it isn't anything to aspire to."

The worst part is, this used to be my most liberal Mormon SIL until she married her Nazi Mormon husband 5 years ago and moved out of state. She even lived with a guy for a while and got her belly button pierced. But then she got back under the Morg's brainwashing program and she is totally hard core now. Sigh.

He seems so real to me. I can see why ward members are voting with their feet.

In most other Christian denominations, the minister in question would probably be fired. That, or church members would simply pack up and go to another church. In the Mormon church, a bad bishop is just one more burden that the members are expected to bear.

How have the budget cuts impacted your ward, CA Girl? Ward budgets have been so lean as it is that it's hard for me to imagine the church cutting them much further.

Being “humble and teachable” is espoused by the church as the cherished opposite of the reprehensible quality of *pride*. How many times did we stuff down our feelings and took disrespect and sometimes abuse from church leaders, believing that we had to do this in order to be properly “humble”? And it took YEARS for us to wake up to the fact that we were not being “humble,” but were instead “knuckling under to bullies”!

TBM SIL’s myopic view on this incident is a perfect example of why TSCC is a cult, not a church.

I like your take on how she is totally missing the emotional and spiritual abuse. She sounds like she is off the charts TBM. Sorry she is so brainwashed. In normal churches you just move on when someone is a bossy arrogant pastor.Bullies are bullies and they come in all ages. He would not make it 10 min. in my book. I would be long gone. But Mormonism keeps them grounded to the neighborhodd. They want the members trapped. Such a controlling organization they are.

by making church attendance unbearable in the ward.

Unfortunately there are probably a downtrodden few who will just take it. Even then, it might finally click with them that it's wrong, that their bishop isn't inspired, that he's just a jerk on a power trip.

Seems to me that Jackwagon is headed for a calling on the carpet by the SP. Good luck with that, bishop.

Ron

Amazing isn't it? How TBM's will bend over backwards, inside out, and every which way but loose to justify or find an excuse for ANYTHING an "inspired priesthood leader" says or does. Glad to see some of them beginning to wise up; for too many though, it's a vicious passive/agressive cycle. And yeah, in real churches, a piss-poor shepherd gets the boot. As well they should.

YUP. I remember that admonition also! The core of the leadership structure is: Follow the Leader and you'll be blessed.
It's about cooperation in Building the Kingdom, or so I was told!

This is a patriarchal tribe using the same business model that is most common: you follow or you pay the consequence, that is how it is constructed and how it operates, much like most other organizations, religious or otherwise that give management the upper hand.

It's the business model used most often: do as you are told, don't make waves, and never be indiscriminate, never question the management, etc. I ran into that in my jobs! It's rampant.Mormonism is run like a business model in many ways.

Agree with you on this, but Mormonism is so different. Most mainstream churches do not look at their religious community as having a management that works like a business. Too bad that the LDS teach this to their young ones early and often.

I think they have to be run that way to stay in the religion business.

CA girl Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Apparently, she feels that if you don't bend
> over and take whatever abuse that the bishop heaps
> on you, then you are full of pride and need to
> humble yourself and learn to take it.
>
> "Why should I watch people being abused because
> they are Mormon and think there is some virtue in
> it?

> Emotional and spiritual abuse are also
> ABUSE. Why is being able to be treated badly just
> because I'm Mormon a virtue when the truth is, the
> abuser is wrong?

I feel like a lot of Mormons that are in my life have a Sackcloth and Ashes attitude towards themselves and it is so sad. Usually, they are the ones who already struggle with self-esteem and feeling of value.

Once again, it is a stark contrast to what is taught. I think of the the YM values. The Leaders say one thing with their lips, but show something completing different with their actions. Sound biblically familiar?

As a TBM, I always felt off-balance trying to reconcile these completely different halves: You are a daughter of god(!)... but you are a vile sinner and need to be rebuked until you humble yourself. WTF?!