Posted by:
deconverted2010
(
)
Date: August 10, 2011 09:59AM
There is really no right or wrong answer here, it depends on you and your boyfriend. There are many factors that will make a relationship work or not, like maturity of both of you, your ways to manage money and others. You'll need to weigh the advise and then find your own answer.
I read your post I wonder if you are moving in with him because you want to move out from your parents' home, or if you are moving in with him because you both want to move in together. If you had a great realtionship with your parents, would you still consider moving in with him? And what is his motivation for moving in with you?
I think you're young and my advise to any young woman your age would be, get an education, explore life, find out who you are before making a big commitment to someone else. As for being shy, a lot of us are, but I think that if you pursue your interests you will meet people and make friends who are not much different than you are.
The odds of the relationship lasting if you move-in together will not be in your favour, however I know people who have met and move in or got married and have life happy lives together. That's life, what works for some will not work for others.
Story 1
A girl I knew from when she was a little kid, as a teen she met a boy (nevermo) and they fell in love. She was living with his father and step-mother, not a nice one by the way. She wanted out and decided she was moving out when she finished high school. Then she said she was moving in with boyfriend the summer between HS and college. TBM parents freaked but finally said fine, but you're getting married, and so they did that summer. She started college, he went to work on family business. That was 7 years ago, they are still together and happy. No kids, just pets. She finished school and is working, he continues to work on family business. They were madly in love, and as far as I can tell they still are.
Story 2
This was my real estate's daughter. He said he was helping DD and boyfriend find a place, they were moving in together. Cool dad, nevermo, found them a place, they had move-in date, etc. I saw him a few months later asked about the family, he told me that his DD was moving back home and he was looking for someone to take over the apartment lease. A month after moving in she started to doubt her decision, and less than six months later she was back at home. According to her dad the boyfriend was fine, normal kid, both early 20's, they knew him for a couple of years. It just didn't work out.
Like I said, it works for some and it doesn't for others.
I just want to add that it is a sign of maturity and intelligence that you are thinking of doing this next year, giving yourself enough time to consider and plan, that also gives you time to think and to continue growing in the relationship, you don't need to decide right now but as time goes by you will know better what you want.
Good luck,
D