http://www.mudrow.org/Herb/FKM1.html

Excerpts:
Liberal Mormons tend to worship most diligently at the altar of their own opinion.

Conservative Mormons believe that gum and Certs, if taken surreptitiously enough, do not count against ones fast.

Orthodox Mormons would not lick a postage stamp on Fast Sunday.

Nazi Mormons will not lick their own lips on Fast Sunday.

"NMs pay tithing based on their gross income, including the things they receive from the bishop's storehouse."

That is the funniest thing I've read all week :)

Has anybody ever known a Nazi Mormon?

I've never known one who wasn't.

In all the places I have lived (UK), I would say the breakdown would be 20% Liberal Mormon, 10% Genuine Mormon, 40% Conservative Mormon and 30% Orthdox Mormon. I don't recognise the Nazi Mormon description, though perhaps that's because we don't have BYU.

I once lived near an family that on Sundays that wore their "church" clothes all day. On conference weekends sat in front of the TV as if they were there in the meeting. The only decorations on the walls were pictures of the temples and mormon leaders.

Being in the service industry, I have seen too many homes like that. Too many to count, AND if their garments, aka "Angel Shorts" were so holy, then WHY did I always fnd em' on the floors, behind doors, in bedrooms being walked on, or piled up in the corner of laundry rooms next to the cat litter box, or dog poop? Yes, I realy did see that happen all the time. I knew of families that didn't even do radio OR TV on Sundays. I am so glad I am outta there!

The Five Types of Mormons was Robert Kirby's first religion article many years ago back in his Utah County policeman days. It almost got him fired from the Utah County Journal until a GA let the paper know he loved it. It was later incorporated into one of his books.

I've read it a number of times and although this one has many things I recognize, it also has a lot of changed or added things that I'm sure are not in the original. The original was much wittier. I wonder if Kirby has seen this.

He visited the site a couple of times and then commented to me in an e-mail that he didn't need to come back; it was pretty much like the contents of his weekly in box from readers.

This was the essay that launched his writing career...

And yes, Kirb lived in the old neighborhood that at one time had Steve Benson, Stray Mutt, myself, wings, et in Utah ego, Wine Country Girl, and some others...

And no, I'm not sure why he stays in the church, but I honor his decision. Privately he holds the opinions a lot of Mormons are nuts, and he wrote a poignant essay about a daughter who was married outside the Temple which included his realization of how exclusionary the Temple Wedding practice was...



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 10/29/2011 06:53PM by SL Cabbie.

Enquiring minds like mine want to know.

http://news.hjnews.com/news/article_2d1e54ea-9a26-11e0-bae3-001cc4c002e0.html

>Also, the court will have to be convinced that a passive religious symbol on state-owned property definitively establishes a state-endorsed religion.

>Kirby and Perry say no.

>“It’s a symbol of execution,” says Kirby. “I’m aware that it’s a Christian symbol but that was not the driving logic behind choosing the crosses. We chose the cross because it was simple and recognizable.”

I'm dropping Kirby an e-mail and inviting him to comment...

Why would you "honor" Kirby's decision to remain in the cult, if you have no idea why he does so? I can understand "accepting" someone decision to remain, since you have no choice in the matter whatsoever. But "honor"? Are you just trying to suck up to Kirby?

I said I honored, his decision, which is entirely different than honoring the person (I'd do that, too, but I'm keeping some confidences, and Kirby is generally a modest and unpretentious sort). Other than acknowledging I don't understand it, I'm not going to criticize it.

There's no implication I agreed with it, only that I abided by it and respected him enough to let him make his own decisions.

You, however, don't honor the Exmormon cause with misreadings and cheap shots... Which is why I'll pass along this this reply from Kirby which was in my morning e-mail (along with a personal note commenting on the cab company brouha that's discussed in another thread).

>Thanks for the invite. But when it comes to chat groups, I’d rather visit a dog fight. I get picked over enough in the paper that I don’t really need another venue for it. I find most atheists... every bit as tedious and pinheaded as the guys in my High Priest Group... Doesn’t take a rocket scientist to see the striking similarity between believers and non-believers.

That's his opinion, of course, not mine. I'm a huge defender of atheists' "rights to a voice," but I often find it isn't done artfully and they do wind up shooting themselves in the foot at times.

The fight over crosses looks pretty juvenile to me, IMHO. If that's what's necessary to keep ID/Creationism out of the science classroom, I'm not optimistic for the forces of enlightenment...



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 10/30/2011 12:25PM by SL Cabbie.