Posted by:
knotheadusc
(
)
Date: November 08, 2011 12:26PM
nonmoparents Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Unfortunately, she considers her step-father her
> father. She told my husband this two years ago at
> Christmas. She tells everyone her family is her
> step-father, mother and little brother from that
> marriage and she has never verbally acknowledged
> us as her family. It appears to me that it's not
> the issue of the step situation, but who is Mormon
> and who is not.
My husband's ex wife got her oldest child, a son she had by her first husband, to call my husband dad. My husband was in that boy's life from the time he was very small until he and the ex divorced. The boy was 12 at that point, and was still calling my husband "dad". And my husband, though he was not legally the boy's father, paid $850 a month in child support for that boy until the kid was 21 years old and loved him as if he were his own.
My husband also had two daughters with his ex wife. They had been very close to him. He was "Daddy". Then the ex decided she wanted a divorce. Actually, it later came out that she didn't want a divorce; she just wanted to control my husband and force him to do what she wanted him to do. They split up.
Ex apparently was waiting for my husband to crawl back to her and submit to her demands. Instead, he found me and about a year after their divorce, we started dating. When my husband finally told ex that he was going to propose to me, she said with some resignation that her boyfriend (who had been shacking up with her in the house my husband paid for) had proposed three times. She was going to say "yes". They got married two months later and she was pregnant two months after that.
Now, my husband's girls, who had once called him "Daddy" and loved him so much, call their stepfather Daddy. They have not spoken to my husband directly since 2004 and in 2006, they tried to demand that he give them up for adoption to their stepfather, who for most of their marriage, hasn't had a job.
Meanwhile, ex reconnected her oldest child with his bio-father, the man who never paid child support and who had been out of his son's life for 15 years or so. She's had two kids with her current husband. Next month, my husband's younger daughter will be 18 and, I'm guessing, she and her sister will probably go ahead and get adopted by their stepfather.
You know what? At this point, I kind of hope they do. I agree with what Rod says about moving on. It's so hurtful what the church and vindictive people do to destroy families when a relationship doesn't work out or someone loses faith.
Edited 3 time(s). Last edit at 11/08/2011 01:25PM by knotheadusc.