Posted by:
CaptainCanuck
(
)
Date: November 21, 2011 12:52PM
A few days ago, I was leaving my local library when I was met with a set of missionaries. One greeted me with a polite head nod. I no longer attend church, but was curious enough to let them speak to me if they chose. As I approached, the one elder smiled and said, "Hello. Can I give you this card? It has our website on it. You can use to look up information about our church."
Some of you may have seen these things already, but I was handed a small card with the full church name on one side, and a picture of a smiling family on the other with a caption that read something like "How can I be happy in my marriage?" and the church website written below. I recognized the card since I've found a few lying on the ground when I walk home from work.
The mishie went on to say that they are "representatives of the church of jesus christ of..." when I interrupted to say, "Yes, I am too." They asked what ward I was in and I said I didn't know since I hadn't been in church in awhile. The other mishie joked and said "Why, are you're too busy?" I said I was taking a break.
At this point, I wish I had been brave enough to say the real reason. I wish I had said, "No, I have not been busy. I made a decision 8 years ago to stop attending the mormon church because I'm gay. The challenge of being both gay and mormon was too painful and for most of my 20's I thought it would be easier to die than to reveal my secret. I attended 3 years of therapy with a mormon counselor, only to discover that there is no actual change from gay to straight. I am much happier now that the church is not attempting to control my thoughts and my actions."
Instead, I changed the subject and asked them the tradition questions one asks the mishies. "How long have you been here in the city?; Where are you from? (both from Utah); Have you been to this part of the world before?; etc, etc". After a moment I left, knowing full well that they were gathering the courage to ask me about attending church again. I kicked myself afterwards for not speaking up. I now hope I have another opportunity to present them with the gay issue, since I'm interested in hearing their response to something like that.
In their defense, both missionaries were polite and friendly. It really made me think about my own time on my mission and how much I've changed over the years. I was also really interested in how they immediately pointed out the church website. I suppose this is a new method of tracting? Trying to connect with the "young folks?"