Posted by:
AnonExMO
(
)
Date: November 19, 2010 02:57PM
5 kids, and had a well established thriving family. I had problems with her early on in flirting with other men, and in having a few mini-emotional relationships along the way (that I ignored for the most part). For instance, a few weeks after our marriage, I caught her in flirtacious discussion with a tall dark missionary in the hallway at church. I was pissed, and I told on him. I confronted her. She blew it off. After that I kept catching her chatting it up with various guys in the ward. She was very pretty in her younger days. There was the EQ president, a few guys in her YBU classes, a dude at the hospital she worked at. I'm talking long phone conversations, after class discussions, rides in the car on campus, etc. She was a flirt. Eventually it became a bit more serious with the 1st Counselor in the Bishopric. This dude actually called her almost everyday for six months to discuss "church business" - yeah right. To make a long story short, I finally caught her red-handed in a sexual affair, and later found out that it had lasted almost a year. I know, I know, there were many red flags, but it was still the most devastating and shocking moment of my life. Not only because of the affair, but because I still had 5 kids under the age of 14. Plus the risk that she had put me under in terms of disease. Most people think the guys are always the players - not in this case. Women can be ho's too.
I immediately forgave her, which she appreciated, and I told her that I would not divorce her if she would remain faithful to me. Well during the three years that followed, there were times when I could not account for her whereabouts, she did not act like a reformed woman, and I had other evidence that she was still involved with this guy. I was then placed in a predicament - do I divorce her or should I hang around for the kids sake? I ended up hanging around for two more years (5 total years post affair). So basically, I gave her another chance and I was faithful to her for 3 more years, but I began looking at other women after that three year mark. I was not committed after I had evidence of ehr cheating the second time. Turns out that it runs in the family - her sister cheated on her 2nd endowed husband just recently. Those two are a couple of ho's.
My advice, having been through it. Well it's a case by case basis, but in general, I'd say that the length and intensity of the affair are things to consider. The longer and more intense, the more likely she will do it again. I mean, anyone can have a weak moment. Another factor to consider is whether children are involved. It's worth hacking it out if you have children. I miss my kids so much. In the end though, if she's not going to take marriage seriously - then kick her to the curb.